Nashville, Welcomes All y'all to the Convention (lease, condominium)

[Diane Giam]

I thought this was funny, and since this is geared to other states. Btw, you need to take Old Hickory to get to my house-Seriouly.



Nashville welcomes all y'all to the debate

Buzz up! A hearty welcome to Nashville, all ye hearty souls who have arrived for Belmont University's mighty presidential debate: Secret Service folks, the thousands of reporters and photographers (yes, there is a beer tent), candidates, pundits and persuaders.

We're glad y'all are here. Say, would you like to buy a condo?


No? Well, if you change your mind, we have quite a few of them available at the moment.

By New York or L.A. standards, they're so cheap you could even buy one for your short stay, then lease it back to a Vanderbilt freshman.

While you're here, we hope you'll take time to enjoy (and use your expense accounts in) Nashville, aka Music City USA, The Third Coast, and The Athens of the South. (That last nickname is not because our buildings have more columns than most cities. It was a tribute to our numerous institutions of higher education).

Y'all have fun now
Here are some tips to enhance your stay:

• Be generous with your servers and valet parkers. Chances are excellent they are musicians or songwriters. Two out of three human beings in Davidson County are. You think that's a joke? My primary care physician used to fill in on the standup bass for Tom T. Hall. Seriously.

So if you want to hear their stuff, just ask. Most of them have a box of CDs inthe trunk of their car. Oh, and if it'stheir very first CD? You can bet dollars to doughnuts it will include a self-penned song about their unique grandfather.

• If the concierge at your hotel gives you directions involving Old Hickory Boulevard, you have done something to tick him off. OHB theoretically circles Nashville, but in reality, it doesn't. If you tryto go the way he said, you may never be seen again. When country stars sing Will the Circle Be Unbroken, they are most definitely not referring to Old Hickory Boulevard.

• A "meat 'n' three" is a reference to what's on the menu at many local restaurants. It does not mean each person at the debate gets to meet the candidates and ask three questions.

The "three" refers to vegetables, a loosely used term. Macaroni and cheese, coleslaw and mashed potatoes? Always on the list. Salsa, polenta, and edamame? Never on the list.

• Take time to visit the historic Belmont Mansion while you are on the campus. It was built, and run, by a fascinating woman named Adelicia Acklen. Born in 1817, she married well (several times) and, with the help of the nation's first prenuptial agreements, grew extremely wealthy and independent beyond her time.

Her story is filled with romance, drama, high-stakes business negotiations and, yes, tragedy.

Today, her legacy lives on not only in the mansion, but also in The Adelicia, located nearby.

That's a brand new high-rise condominium development. Just in case you're interested