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One thing i realized as i got older and have gone through quite a few relationships before meeting my wife is the problem was never the city, circle of friends, places i worked, met people, etc the problem was ME.
Perhaps you need to change some things about yourself before realizing what needs to be fixed and meeting an amazing person.
This.
Add to the fact that people here are extremely picky and you have a recipe for loneliness.
Most would spend their weekends alone or with a friend with benefit then actually take the time to get to
know people.
Moving to Texas is not going to help the OP. She is 36 and from what I read seems to be attractive.
Pretty sure she has had PLENTY of opportunities to find a good guy. Probably have turned down quite a
few decent ones for one reason or another.
36 is getting up there. She cannot be choosy like she used to be or she find herself hitting 40 with the same results.
I don't feel sorry for her or any other ladies in her position at all.
You obviously have no children yet. Also, women tend to catch up and look older than men in their 40s so hold on tight cause that feeling you have now will be what men will be thinking of you later!
This is such a ridiculous stereotype that women deteriorate after having children. My wife is 54 and she looks better now, after having two children, then when I met her when she was 29. Of course she looks older. But she looks better.
I also noticed this at a recent 35th high school reunion. While yes, there was a good share of women (and men) who looked absolutely awful, there were others who were total knockouts.
This is such a ridiculous stereotype that women deteriorate after having children. My wife is 54 and she looks better now, after having two children, then when I met her when she was 29. Of course she looks older. But she looks better.
Better than that 25 year old apprentice in the office?
Go to the Bronx or Brooklyn and tell a woman that she is pretty or good bless you baby. These comments only inflate a woman's ego here in nyc and ruin it for future potential guys later on. Especially nice guys.
Your post is funny and so accurate. I am guilty of trying to look younger myself and had to laugh lol
I've said it before, NYC is a rare case where too many choices have become the problem in the dating scene. I've never seen so many people who are completely idealistic and set on finding the perfect one than I have here...
In contrast to much smaller cities and towns, people seem to marry and appear to be satisfied far more frequently without much complaining with far less choices.
I have asked myself a million times, why is it so difficult to meet Mr. Right in NYC? What am I doing wrong? I don't think that I'm asking for too much, typically I look for guys that have a similar background as myself. I am interested in finding a nice guy who is loving, caring, spiritually inclined, family oriented, ambitious, and professional.
Perhaps it's my age that is working against me. I'm 36! Is it too late for me to meet the right guy, get married and have a family? Should I pack my bags and head for Texas or is it still possible to find love and committment in NYC?
Honestly, I've seen a lot of women in your predicament. In NYC, the time seems to fly by so fast, I'm a few years younger than you and it seems like it was just yesterday that we had the first anniversary for 9/11...anyway...to be quite frank...yes you are doomed if having a family and settling down are your ambitions at this point...my wife's friend said exactly the same thing that you're saying now, 4 years ago (it's hard to believe that it's been that long) and she'll now be 40 years old this year...she's pretty much tossed out the idea of marrying and having a family, although she did want one when she was in her mid 30s...and she's now stuck on the train tracks of desperately meeting and sleeping with several men hoping that something will work...only to rack up more numbers than the lotto as time passes by.
And not to be mean or sexist or anything...but in this city...the women are trying to be like the men...meaning that alot of them are geared towards dedicating themselves towards building a career, in addition to dating and sleeping around with guys simply for the drama and the fun of it...whilst not knowing that they are spending their most valuable menstrual years 'finding' themselves.
My opinion? You have to act now...either drop some of your requirements, get active and let your intentions be known....because believe it or not...there's ALOT of men who think just as you do out there...and/or move somewhere where the dating scene fits your needs.
Dating is a numbers game that has a lot to do with timing and everything to do with "chemistry". You can actively try (dating sites, singles events, etc) or you can passively try (doing activities where you meet people) but you need to try. I met my boyfriend online and would never in a million years think I could me a decent guy on a dating site. This was after having thrown my hands up in the air in sheer annoyance with all of the train wrecks for boyfriend material out there.
Oh and don't let the guys on here tell you you're past your expiration. If you're hot with a hot body men don't care about the number.
I'll disagree with that...Having men think that you're attractive and having men that actively want to settle down with you aren't mutually inclusive. I'll use my friend in my previous statement as a an example...she's attractive, educated, and extremely personable and well rounded...all the other variables aside...does she have a problem getting men to hit on and/or who want to sleep with her? Absolutely not...now does she have a problem finding guys who want to take her seriously, build and be in a long term relationship with her? Absolutely. I think it is largely due to her age...and that's pretty much it.
Personally, if I were single, and saw her out in the street, I wouldn't mind going after her either...but would I marry/settle down with her? Nope, and it's really because of her age (she'll be 40 this year).
Too many people, which creates too much competition.
And temptation!
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! Is it too late for me to meet the right guy, get married and have a family? Should I pack my bags and head for Texas or is it still possible to find love and committment in NYC?
