friend demanding I pay her back now..when I can't.. (couples, person)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
We don't know why the friend is demanding to be paid now, other than the OP telling her that she'd pay her now. Maybe a better friend wouldn't be starting an argument about $45, but there is no excuse for the OP's attitude. The OP has taken no responsibility for this at all. she didn't come here saying she feels bad that she messed up and now isn't able to pay her debt. That's the problem. she puts all the blame on the person who loaned her money. How does that make any sense?
As for your parents giving you money, that is totally different. they are your parents. It would get old pretty fast to always be the one giving money to a friend, and never the one receiving.
If I bought you a concert ticket, and you dragged your feet on repayment, I'd give the ticket to someone else. Maybe a good friend doesn't demand immediate payment, but a good friend would pay up ASAP.
I agreed to pay her on payday..she demanded it. I wasn't even sure I"d be able to afford all of the 45 bucks this paycheck..probably only 20 with this one..but I figured I'd wait till I saw what my check was before I told her that 20 was all I could afford at this time. Of cousre I feel bad that I messed up..how dare you make me some bratty inhumane person because I made a mistake? I'm not putting all the blame on her. the only thing I"m blaming her for, is not being accommodating and demanding I dip into my savings which when you're in college..at least for me, is for my rent, not concert tickets. that stuff comes out my paychecks. that's how I will do things until I have a professional job with real pay.
Also, to all of you saying I'm not paying her back, ever..read this thread. I said I can't pay her back NOW, but I can in a few days. reading comprehension skills 101 .
I stopped fronting money for "friends" for this very reason. OP is an idiot. I don't care if you have to sell something, it's your #1 priority to pay people back the money they lend you so THEY don't have to suffer for you.. You aren't worth it.
when I say I am never paying her back, then your post will be valid. otherwise..you're just rude. ..she isn't suffering by the way.
You should have refused to take the ticket so you would not owe her anything but since you agreed you should have already had her paid in full no matter how much she makes. It was your decision to NOT stand your ground and refuse to let her purchase the tickets. I don't think she is being rude at all and if you have money in savings and wanted to go to the concert that badly why not draw your money out of savings to pay for the ticket in the first place?
She is NOT telling you what to do with YOUR money she is telling you to give her the money YOU OWE HER, very different issues here. So either give her the money still owed on the ticket out of your savings or ask for the money you have already paid to be returned to you, tell her to keep the ticket and write her off as a "friend". Then next time make sure there is no next time so there are no money issues with friends.
again...my savings is not for this stuff, as a college student. she knew I would have to pay in increments and was fine with it. she knew it was tough for me..yet insisted. anyways..yes, lesson learned..don't accept anything from anyone. got it.
I think the only one being harsh here is Mir86...being poor didn't bother her when she agreed to borrow the money...now that it needs to be paid back..it does?.......why should her friend wait, when there is no need to?....If you ask me, Mir86 is willing to lose a friend over 40 dollers...too bad....you can bet the friend learned a lesson as well....don't lend money to a friend if you want to keep them as friends.
Clearly you need to learn to read. where did I say I was not paying her back? I said I can't pay her back NOW . so, yes, she is the one willing to dump this friendship over a few bucks that she is gonna get anyways. I definitely valued her friendship, but after her not being accommodating (among a few other things that are now making more sense), I'm not sure I'm too bummed anymore. but if she feels that I'm the horrible person here when I have always paid her back (or been fair when it comes to splitting bills on travel when we have traveled, things like that) on things like this, then that's her opinion and that's fine. she's entitled to that. If it makes me entitled to feel that the only thing I really did awfully wrong was pay her a few days later than I said I could, then so be it.
when I say I am never paying her back, then your post will be valid. otherwise..you're just rude. ..she isn't suffering by the way.
It doesn't have to be NEVER to be valid. And whether she is "suffering" or not isn't your business or the issue. Paying her back is your priority...so eat raman for a week and do the right thing and learn a lesson.
I would never put off paying back a friend who fronted me money, I'd be embarassed and feel like a loser. As I should.
I was supposed to get paid today and I told a friend of mine that I'd pay the remaining 45 dollars for a concert ticket that I owe her. When she bought the tickets, I told her it was a bit much for me and she insisted she'd buy them and I can just pay her back but she never gave me specific due dates until now and she knows my pay has dropped and I've paid her almost half..which is tough on me but I know I owe her so I did. well anyways, I didn't realize that I forgot to turn in my time sheet for the job that was supposed to pay me today, so I didn't get paid and now its going to have to wait until next pay period. I tell her this and she demands I draw out of my savings cause she has bills to pay (and I don't??)...and she makes double what I make! I'm so outraged. I don't even know what to do..this is the second fight her and I have had in 2 weeks, over stupid and rude stuff on her end. If she made the same or less than me, I would just draw out my savings for her, but she makes double so how dare she tell me what to do with my money???
It's not your money. It's her $45 that you owe her. It doesn't matter how much she makes and how much you make. Take it out of your savings, pay her, and move on.
Quote:
Originally Posted by redvelvet709
This is the kind of liberal argument that makes me crazy. You OWE her. She does have a legitimate gripe. For you to even make mention of her income in relation to this is highly immature.
And this is the kind of b.s. ideological sideswipe that makes me crazy. Whether one is liberal or conservative has nothing to do with it. Want proof? I'm a liberal. If you want to argue politics, go to the political forum.
It doesn't have to be NEVER to be valid. And whether she is "suffering" or not isn't your business or the issue. Paying her back is your priority...so eat raman for a week and do the right thing and learn a lesson.
I would never put off paying back a friend who fronted me money, I'd be embarassed and feel like a loser. As I should.
I'm not even eating real food! . Haven't even bought groceries in weeks. My mother has been sending me food because she wants me to eat real and healthy food..which is free, meaning cheaper than that disgusting food you call Ramen. So you're right that her suffering is none of my business, but what you're forgetting, is that I happen to know she isn't. My savings is not really a savings..its rent money. it will be a real savings once I have a "big girl" job next year and then I can just dip into savings for things like this. as for the loser thing..I'm a few days late..there are way bigger things in life than money paid a few days late, to feel like a loser for.
I'm not even eating real food! . Haven't even bought groceries in weeks. My mother has been sending me food because she wants me to eat real and healthy food..which is free, meaning cheaper than that disgusting food you call Ramen. So you're right that her suffering is none of my business, but what you're forgetting, is that I happen to know she isn't. My savings is not really a savings..its rent money. it will be a real savings once I have a "big girl" job next year and then I can just dip into savings for things like this. as for the loser thing..I'm a few days late..there are way bigger things in life than money paid a few days late, to feel like a loser for.
Does it make a difference if you take the $45 out of your savings now and put it right back when you get paid? At least if you pay your friend you will not have to deal with this acrimony.
Really, $45 is not worth all the stress this is causing.
Does it make a difference if you take the $45 out of your savings now and put it right back when you get paid? At least if you pay your friend you will not have to deal with this acrimony.
Really, $45 is not worth all the stress this is causing.
yes, it actually will. if it wouldn't, I wouldn't be causing such commotion over this. I'm not that bratty, lol. I've had other really major emergencies that I'm still trying to repay into my savings and I'm going broke trying to pay for everything so I haven't really done much of anything fun lately or that costs "extra". that's why I was very upfront with my friend about my situation if she insisted I go with her to the concert given my financial situation. I never said I would never pay her back. 75 bucks is doable, just not all at once, right away. I've already paid her back 30 of it and I will pay her the rest in a few days.
I forgot this forum is full of middle class professionals. I'm a poor college kid..45 bucks is the diffrence between a meal and a full gas tank, or not, for me. g.
Then maybe you shouldn't be going to concerts, etc.
Certainly not on borrowed money...or any money till you have enough savings to handle small emergencies.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
.
..she isn't suffering by the way.
. so, yes, she is the one willing to dump this friendship over a few bucks that she is gonna get anyways. I definitely valued her friendship, but after her not being accommodating (among a few other things that are now making more sense), I'm not sure I'm too bummed anymore. but if she feels that I'm the horrible person here when I have always paid her back (or been fair when it comes to splitting bills on travel when we have traveled, things like that) on things like this, then that's her opinion and that's fine. she's entitled to that. If it makes me entitled to feel that the only thing I really did awfully wrong was pay her a few days later than I said I could, then so be it.
