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I have family like this and can beat the 36 yo grandma--I have a relative who became a g-ma at 29! And a sis who has skated thru life never working a job that could be listed on a resume. At 47 though, her gravy train is beginning to slow down.
A lot of you are jumping on the OP, but it does boil down to character. Since when is it wrong to expect people to work and actually pull their own weight rather than living off of taxpayers/other people? I know it becomes a cycle when you are born into a family where that is the norm, but still you have to know that you really should be supporting yourself. And OP said that is not the case with his acquaintance anyway.
I dunno, maybe my experience is different than most (I hope not), but I grew up with a father who was fiercely proud and considered it HIS responsibility to provide for his family. He grew up poor and heck, *I* grew up poor. My dad was a blue collar/working poor worker his whole life. I know we would have qualified for assistance. But we were never hungry and he figured out a way to provide for us. It wasn't anything he taught me by saying it; he lived it. He got up and went to work every day. In exchange for housing, he did all the farm work for the landowner where we lived. He started that job when he got home from his day job. I only remember him mentioning public assistance/welfare one time and what he said was that there was no way he would ever accept it. I guess maybe if he were disabled or in a position that he really couldn't provide for his kids, that he would have had to reevaluate his stance, but I really think he would have figured out a way to take care of us without government assistance.
I don't understand why the government gives money to able-bodied people who COULD be working and seniors who have worked all their lives are given barely enough to live on (or not enough to live on). If I were president, people who were able to work would be required to work. I would take that money from entitlement progams and give it to seniors. I would also send all the illegal aliens home (the former welfare recipients could take over those jobs) and they would no longer receive education, food stamps, housing, or healthcare from the US government. I would use that money for our seniors too, and for our military.
If that makes me a judgmental idiot, then okay! I think the Bible says "If a man will not work, neither shall he eat." Cannot work - well that is different. But will not work? Yeah, that describes a lot of (most of, I would say) the people on public assistance.
You're just a judgemental idiot, now get off the computer and get back to work.
Whoa there, new kid on the block. Chowhound is not a judgmental idiot.
I do suspect he may have hit a nerve of yours.
And it is spelled - judgmental. The little squiggly red line under a word indicates a misspelling. Right click on it to select the correctly spelled word. Use it. How is that for "judgement?"
A lot of you are jumping on the OP, but it does boil down to character. Since when is it wrong to expect people to work and actually pull their own weight rather than living off of taxpayers/other people? I know it becomes a cycle when you are born into a family where that is the norm, but still you have to know that you really should be supporting yourself. And OP said that is not the case with his acquaintance anyway.
I dunno, maybe my experience is different than most (I hope not), but I grew up with a father who was fiercely proud and considered it HIS responsibility to provide for his family. He grew up poor and heck, *I* grew up poor. My dad was a blue collar/working poor worker his whole life. I know we would have qualified for assistance. But we were never hungry and he figured out a way to provide for us. It wasn't anything he taught me by saying it; he lived it. He got up and went to work every day. In exchange for housing, he did all the farm work for the landowner where we lived. He started that job when he got home from his day job. I only remember him mentioning public assistance/welfare one time and what he said was that there was no way he would ever accept it. I guess maybe if he were disabled or in a position that he really couldn't provide for his kids, that he would have had to reevaluate his stance, but I really think he would have figured out a way to take care of us without government assistance.
I don't understand why the government gives money to able-bodied people who COULD be working and seniors who have worked all their lives are given barely enough to live on (or not enough to live on). If I were president, people who were able to work would be required to work. I would take that money from entitlement progams and give it to seniors. I would also send all the illegal aliens home (the former welfare recipients could take over those jobs) and they would no longer receive education, food stamps, housing, or healthcare from the US government. I would use that money for our seniors too, and for our military.
If that makes me a judgmental idiot, then okay! I think the Bible says "If a man will not work, neither shall he eat." Cannot work - well that is different. But will not work? Yeah, that describes a lot of (most of, I would say) the people on public assistance.
I agree, since when is it wrong to work for a living and not live off the taxpayers?? If there were no taxpayers, or people working to support others, then they could not sit home on their butt eating cheese puffs and watching Springer all day!
Common sense says entiltlement programs breeds more entitlement...when are you going to teach people in this country to be responsible and know they have to work for something??
I agree, since when is it wrong to work for a living and not live off the taxpayers?? If there were no taxpayers, or people working to support others, then they could not sit home on their butt eating cheese puffs and watching Springer all day!
Common sense says entiltlement programs breeds more entitlement...when are you going to teach people in this country to be responsible and know they have to work for something??
I agree with you.
I'm empathetic and do understand temporary situations where public aid may be necessary for unfortunate circumstances involving a lay-off and major medical. Sometimes poo may fly when least expected for someone that normally rides high on the hog in their life.
However, those who ride the system, are manipulative and lazy, IMO. There is absolutely no reason that the public should have to support someone's continued poor life decisions with so many options out there in this day and age for betterment.
Well.... I'm certainly getting my rear end handed to me....
I, in no way, wasn't discounting SAHM parents, as I think that is the hardest job that there is... I see this from afar, as I have not kids myself, but I can respect the hard work of parents.
I think, that perhaps I framed this thread in the wrong context. Yes, I was probably a little bit harsh and being a little judgmental, but I did acknowledge that a couple of times, yet I still got a lot of heat about it. The thread should have been the bigger picture about bad decisions we make and the lack of personal responsibility, not necessarily about that one particular friend. It's just a big rough to see a lot of people making really stupid decisions repeatedly through out their lives, while others try and do the more responsible thing.
I, can also, to a degree, see that some people in life don't have the wherewithal to be as successful as others... not that I'm so successful...
I have family like this and can beat the 36 yo grandma--I have a relative who became a g-ma at 29! And a sis who has skated thru life never working a job that could be listed on a resume. At 47 though, her gravy train is beginning to slow down.
Well.... I'm certainly getting my rear end handed to me....
I, in no way, wasn't discounting SAHM parents, as I think that is the hardest job that there is... I see this from afar, as I have not kids myself, but I can respect the hard work of parents.
I think, that perhaps I framed this thread in the wrong context. Yes, I was probably a little bit harsh and being a little judgmental, but I did acknowledge that a couple of times, yet I still got a lot of heat about it. The thread should have been the bigger picture about bad decisions we make and the lack of personal responsibility, not necessarily about that one particular friend. It's just a big rough to see a lot of people making really stupid decisions repeatedly through out their lives, while others try and do the more responsible thing.
I, can also, to a degree, see that some people in life don't have the wherewithal to be as successful as others... not that I'm so successful...
Everyone wants a better society. Everyone wants others to be as productive and accountable as they are.
The sad fact is, humanity is not perfect. Some people have the misfortune to be born into circumstances which hold them back, or have things happen to them over the years that stop them ever being 100% healthy.
We will never know an individual's circumstances. All you can do, if you're lucky enough to be in the percent that has managed to pull together a "functional" life, is be more sympathetic to others and not assume you are the judge and jury of "success".
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