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I do read cues in such situations pretty well, and respect that "leave me be" vibe.
It's easy to tell another gregarious soul when we meet. But I guess I can say, the hundred people I've transited in close seat proximity, who wanted nothing but to pretend they weren't surrounded by other human beings, and kept themselves neatly closed off to contact...they are instantly and utterly forgettable. But the ones who shared their stories and listened to mine, on the other hand, are remembered and appreciated.
I keep meeting people who seem to hate all of the rest of humanity. I can't get on board with that, I know too many wonderful people. I just wish sometimes that I had more frequent or meaningful interaction with some of them. If I didn't find other human beings interesting, I probably wouldn't be here trying to talk to you people, or reading your input on your own lives and on mine, would I now?
It is illustrative of some of the issues of forming relationships, romantic and otherwise. Look how many people are hostile to the idea of forming new connections in person. I mean, I know, there is awkwardness in the airplane environment, sure. But I wonder do you similarly prefer that strangers just not engage with you in other places in life? Do you think this harms your chances or odds of meeting someone special? Or is it perfectly acceptable to just approach people via the cold glare of a monitor, and scary to do so in the flesh, now? What's up with that?
I do read cues in such situations pretty well, and respect that "leave me be" vibe.
It's easy to tell another gregarious soul when we meet. But I guess I can say, the hundred people I've transited in close seat proximity, who wanted nothing but to pretend they weren't surrounded by other human beings, and kept themselves neatly closed off to contact...they are instantly and utterly forgettable. But the ones who shared their stories and listened to mine, on the other hand, are remembered and appreciated.
I keep meeting people who seem to hate all of the rest of humanity. I can't get on board with that, I know too many wonderful people. I just wish sometimes that I had more frequent or meaningful interaction with some of them. If I didn't find other human beings interesting, I probably wouldn't be here trying to talk to you people, or reading your input on your own lives and on mine, would I now?
It is illustrative of some of the issues of forming relationships, romantic and otherwise. Look how many people are hostile to the idea of forming new connections in person. I mean, I know, there is awkwardness in the airplane environment, sure. But I wonder do you similarly prefer that strangers just not engage with you in other places in life? Do you think this harms your chances or odds of meeting someone special? Or is it perfectly acceptable to just approach people via the cold glare of a monitor, and scary to do so in the flesh, now? What's up with that?
When I book a flight I am not trying to meet someone special or otherwise. I am trying to get from Point A to Point B. I already have special people in my life and don't need lonely creeps using the mere coincidence that we are sitting next to each other in a metal tube in the sky as a chance to chat me up and try to get my number. Just look at all the creeps in this thread that are willing to admit that they would like the chance to have a flight during which they are seated next to an attractive female.
I do read cues in such situations pretty well, and respect that "leave me be" vibe.
It's easy to tell another gregarious soul when we meet. But I guess I can say, the hundred people I've transited in close seat proximity, who wanted nothing but to pretend they weren't surrounded by other human beings, and kept themselves neatly closed off to contact...they are instantly and utterly forgettable. But the ones who shared their stories and listened to mine, on the other hand, are remembered and appreciated.
I keep meeting people who seem to hate all of the rest of humanity. I can't get on board with that, I know too many wonderful people. I just wish sometimes that I had more frequent or meaningful interaction with some of them. If I didn't find other human beings interesting, I probably wouldn't be here trying to talk to you people, or reading your input on your own lives and on mine, would I now?
It is illustrative of some of the issues of forming relationships, romantic and otherwise. Look how many people are hostile to the idea of forming new connections in person. I mean, I know, there is awkwardness in the airplane environment, sure. But I wonder do you similarly prefer that strangers just not engage with you in other places in life? Do you think this harms your chances or odds of meeting someone special? Or is it perfectly acceptable to just approach people via the cold glare of a monitor, and scary to do so in the flesh, now? What's up with that?
Eh?
I prefer to be left to myself becuase when I travel it means I have been dealing and interacting with people all day. The flight is generally my "alone" unwind time.
I do not shun anyone who may approach me and try to start a conversation, but if I am giving off a vide that I want to be alone...it's becuase I honestly want to be left alone.
I'm likely to chat with people during long flights (it seems awkward to sit pretty much on someone's lap for, say, a transatlantic flight, and not once acknowledge their presence).
Overall, though, I generally find it interesting to get to know others, and if someone is horribly boring or an awful conversationalist, I'm pretty good at politely wrapping things up and going back to my book or nap or whatever. On the other hand, if they're interesting, I'd rather spend the flight being interactive than engaging in solitary pursuits.
I don't tend to initiate conversation with strangers, however (in any setting, not just on planes), but tend to let others take the lead.
All I know is I had a blast with the guy sitting next to me on my last flight.
He fell asleep while we were delayed for take-off, so when the announcement came on that it was time to roll, I tapped him on the arm. He woke up and I pointed to his ginger ale (we were in first class) and said, "I wouldn't want that to end up in your--"
and as he went to pick it up, he knocked his drink into his
"--lap."
He looked at my wine and said, "I should have a drink."
Fast-forward 25 minutes or so, and a boy about 9 years old in the first row behind the wall lets out this HUGE kid-burp, much like the first burp in this video:
The guy looks at me, and his eyebrows pretty much disappeared into his hairline. We about lost it trying not to laugh out loud.
Another 10 minutes go by, and we hear the kid spill his drink all over the floor.
So the guy looks at me and says, "She's got her hands full with that one."
And then, in a soft voice tinged with defeat, we hear a woman say from behind the wall, "God help me."
This may already be here because the thread is old, but...
I really try to ignore the people I sit next to because I've been stuck listening to people I don't want to.
On one flight I was in the middle, so immediately started reading, then watched a movie... after started chatting with the man next me: a Ph.d in math with his field being infectious disease, from Egypt. He was absolutely fascinating and I kicked myself for losing 3 hours I could have been talking to him. But that's the only time.
I'm fine talking with people in the shops, the restaurant, the bar, and the boarding area. Just not anyone seated next to me.
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When I book a flight I am not trying to meet someone special or otherwise. I am trying to get from Point A to Point B. I already have special people in my life and don't need lonely creeps using the mere coincidence that we are sitting next to each other in a metal tube in the sky as a chance to chat me up and try to get my number. Just look at all the creeps in this thread that are willing to admit that they would like the chance to have a flight during which they are seated next to an attractive female.
And this makes an assumption I find rather annoying, but it pervades American (western?) culture... That anyone who is speaking to you must want something from you. People do not simply interact...there must be more to it! It is the same assumption where males and females cannot be friends, and a stranger of the opposite gender dare not smile at you in the street. Beware! Everyone must be out to use your body, it could not be anything but that! Basic friendliness is subject to all kinds of suspicion. Well, I find that pretty awful. But different strokes for different folks, I suppose.
Me...I like people. But, I'm an unapologetic extravert. I may know plenty of people, but I usually enjoy meeting more.
The man I spent a good 4 hours chatting with on a plane last year, he wasn't trying to get my number. He wasn't up to anything nefarious. He was just friendly and liked to talk. He explained that he very much preferred the entertainment of conversation over trying to awkwardly sleep or engage in some sort of solitary passing of the time. I quite agreed, and we had a very nice time talking.
But again, unless someone is unusually poor at reading the cues of others, it is easy to tell when someone does NOT want to talk. I'm as capable as anyone, of reading a book or awkwardly trying to nap on a plane.
Ah, it is also worth mentioning that while talking to other travelers on a plane can be pleasant...talking to other travelers on a Greyhound bus is generally inadviseable. I HAVE met some rather scary people the couple of times I've done a bus trip before...
Morning flights: I have probably been up since 4 am and doing nothing but trying to get on the damn plane. So I am not up for socializing. Not a morning person at all.
Evening or night flights: By the time I get on a flight I am usually well buzzed so once we hit cruising altitude I am out like a light. Not much for idle chit chat.
If you find me in the bar pre flight I will shoot the chit with you no problem.
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