Spend time with people who you have no conversational chemistry?

[stan4]

Actually, a couple of my best friends and favorite people are like this...pulling teeth.

But I like them so much, it is ok if I have to be the conversational cruise director.

One of them has a chatty husband, so it is easier when he is there.

[jillianshae713]

I know exactly what you mean. I used to have people that I tried to be friends with but there was NO conversation so finally the friendship died down. I only have a few people I choose to talk with, I mostly avoid conversation all together or I talk about things no one wants to talk about so I don't have to deal with the anxiety of attempting to keep it going.

[CSD610]

I don't waste my time in the presence of anyone I cannot have an actual conversation with, there is no point at all.

[DrSloan]

There's an old saying going around that says: "The truth is stranger than fiction" Do you you want to know the whole truth and nothing but the truth? Most people live boring and mundane lives, and the only ways to make themselves sound interesting is to make up fabricated stories. How do I know this? Because I've already been through a TON of experiences in my life and easily catch people in lies. But I tend to brush it off and pretend they don't exist. If they want to make themselves feel important for no reason, then I have no reason to stop them.

[Martha Anne]

Originally Posted by I'm Retired Now

It's amazing how much time I have to spend with people who I share absolutely no conversational chemistry. They are usually friends of my wife, relatives or people who are in various groups I participate in. I use every trick in the book to get the conversation in gear to make it interesting for everyone but both parties appear to be unsatisfied. I leave the event bored to tears and they give me the impression they feel the same. At least I try.

Is this common with you and how do you cope? (Don't tell me I don't have to attend, I do!)

I don't think you DO have to attend. If your wife knows you are bored to tears, she should be more understanding.

I am in my mid 60's and we now pretty much only spend time with people who interest us. We even avoid many close family members and have come to realize how relieved we have become. It takes practice. Try it.