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To all the step moms out there stressing over adult step children....... do yourself a favor and cut all ties! If any of them are rude or disrespectful one time - cut all ties and communication! Support your mate! I am so much happier and my marriage is so wonderful once I butted out of everything! We now spend our weekends and holidays with each other doing something romantic and tell the children "call us if you want to come visit for a couple of hours" We are having a blast being free and its interesting to watch the other grandparents enslave themselves to these selfish children! They call us more now then they ever have but "sorry weve made plans this weekend" thanks for calling!