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You got to use your energy to take care of you and your family. That is #1. Anyone in her life are going to know whats going on, and likely trying to help her or out of gas on it too. We can't save other people.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,742,544 times
Reputation: 41381
KA, I know damn well we don't see eye to eye on a lot. But trust me when I tell you this, the best thing you can do with someone who is not on meds for bipolar disorder, is staying away from them. You've done what you could do, now (as the church folks would say) time to let go and let "God."
Stay with this if you can handle the stresses of your daily life with a liberal sprinkling of her bipolar disorder heaped on top.
Miss Hep had some great ideas.
Thank you.
She is so disruptive that my other friends and family literally cannot stand being around her. I mean, I've invited her to family events and other events with friends, and without exception they've told me she drove them up a wall with her incessant loud and domineering talking and laughing (she won't attend any events when she's on the low end of her cycling so people only see her when she's "up").
Once she got mono, and naturally she got bored staying at home with it, and after a couple of weeks she wanted to come over to my house or me go over to her house, even though she was still symptomatic. I didn't want to risk getting mono and neither did my husband. No, neither of us had weakened immune systems, but my husband is self employed and the financial impact would have been catastrophic on us if he'd gotten mono. Considering that she also has chronic sinus issues and complained about being allergic to cats (she has several and I have one) so she was always sniffling and sneezing, etc I just didn't feel comfortable with in person visits while she was actively sick with mono and I was just honest with her about it. After all, her doctor had even told her to stay home for four weeks, which wasn't too difficult for her to do since she doesn't work, but she was bored and wanted company.
She was FURIOUS at me for not coming over or allowing her to come over. I mean, furious. She was still mad about that the other day when she called - "I wasn't going to give your PRECIOUS HUSBAND mono! I didn't even give my OWN husband mono!" I just felt that was so inappropriate. But then...she's inappropriate, so I don't know why I'm even surprised.
After all the sympathy and support you have given her, is she better off?
Have you been able to help her?
You are not in a position to help her. You can not save her. There is nothing you can do to fix her or help her. She needs professional help and the right meds.
You have to let go of her and realize that you tried everything you could to help her. She has to hit rock bottom before she can get better.
You know, I know a few bi-polar people and none of them are this rude and inconsiderate. I get she isn't fully controlled on meds, but even manic or depressed, the people with bipolar I know are not nearly as rude, intrusive and difficult as this woman.
It brings me to a couple thoughts
1) more is going on with her mental health (like a personality disorder)
2) I can't help but wonder if she was taking the meds as prescribed all along. I know the side effects suck, and its hard for bipolar people to want to take them because of that. If she went totally off them, I wonder if she was every fully compliant.
Sorry but iam with photobuff. She needs professional help. No matter what you do, you cant help her.
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