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Unfortunately there have been too many negative comments about loners; and society being what it is, too often people believe that all loners are psychos.
When a person is comfortable with who they are and their lifestyle, and isn't wanting to blow away humanity - they shouldn't give a rat's patootie what anyone else thinks.
If we want to critique other's life choices, Why not question those who can't seem to stay at home for more than 20 minutes and are consumed with going out way too often? How about a person who claims they can't stand to be alone? Does that make them emotionally ill by not being able to spend time alone?
The OP is clearly NOT comfortable with who she is and her lifestyle. Or else why post like this?
To answer your final question...perhaps/sometimes, yes.
Unfortunately there have been too many negative comments about loners; and society being what it is, too often people believe that all loners are psychos.
The criticism here is NOT about being a loner. Nor have I seen it said that "all loners are psychos" (Wonder why YOU drew that conclusion....)
Quote:
Originally Posted by katie45
When a person is comfortable with who they are and their lifestyle, and isn't wanting to blow away humanity - they shouldn't give a rat's patootie what anyone else thinks.
Yeah, IF the person is comfortable with who they are and their lifestyle.
The OP is NOT - take time to read her other posts! - but will not do anything to change it
If you would connect with the deaf community you would see that EVERYONE struggles with verbal language with hearing people and for MOST everyday deaf people, that doesn't stop them.
I know MANY MANY MANY deaf people who grunt and groan and do charades communicating with the hearing even at work.
So, yes, this is all in your head and the anxiety, not really practical issues. Besides, even with lop sided eyes you could wear some type of tinted glasses. Or put a patch on one.
Adults tease you? Hmmmmm....like what? "Are you winking at me"? That's just stupid.
Nobody can help with geographic issues but the deaf community is prominently ONLINE anyway. Get some support perhaps.
You're CHOOSING to sit around on SSI for your whole life which is such a waste. And you're sentencing yourself to a lifetime of poverty relying on the government for stipends.
I've got the winking comments/jokes from men. I am part of an online deaf group.
I just feel so out of place with people. Growing up from my teen years and on, I hardly talked to anyone, not even at school. I kept to myself. Never had one close friend to do things with once I was in high schhol. Jr, high was somewhat like that too. That was around the time my favorite chilhood friend decided not to have much to do with me anymore. We rarely spoke or seen each other.
For years and years, I was stuck in a rut of working in retail. Living in the country where houses were scattered, I didn't talk to ANYONE except at work and my parents since I lived with them. I rarely went anywhere fun in my 20's.
Then my favorite childhood friend settled down in our hometown. Wanting to get out of the rut but didn't know where and how to turn, I took advantage of her kindness inviting myself to her home all the time. I then became very unhappy with myself because I've missed out on so much in my younger years and 20's. That and hating working in retail. Instead of being honest with my feelings and not having confidence at the time to quit a crappy job, I attempted suicide.
The retail job I've worked for many years took a toll on me and few years later I did quit
Quote:
Originally Posted by katie45
Unfortunately there have been too many negative comments about loners; and society being what it is, too often people believe that all loners are psychos.
If we want to critique other's life choices, Why not question those who can't seem to stay at home for more than 20 minutes and are consumed with going out way too often? How about a person who claims they can't stand to be alone? Does that make them emotionally ill by not being able to spend time alone?
Just because someone choose to live a certain way doesn't mean its wrong.
Unfortunately there have been too many negative comments about loners; and society being what it is, too often people believe that all loners are psychos.
When a person is comfortable with who they are and their lifestyle, and isn't wanting to blow away humanity - they shouldn't give a rat's patootie what anyone else thinks.
If we want to critique other's life choices, Why not question those who can't seem to stay at home for more than 20 minutes and are consumed with going out way too often? How about a person who claims they can't stand to be alone? Does that make them emotionally ill by not being able to spend time alone?
And some of "them," e.g. "me," don't as-you-say give that rat's patootie. Whatsoever. Agreed there. I have no plans to blow away humanity, ever.
As expressed elsewhere in this thread, big difference between "isolated, and wanting to engage but cannot due to ...(fill in blank)". That's sad, and I hope they find resources to overcome the challenge. Truly.
The other hand are those who don't like people, aren't "angry" about it, but treasure solitude. Lot of them living in the mountains and wilderness around here, of which there is plenty (Seattle and western WA: wild country).
I treasure solitude. Best pals calls me "his reclusive friend." I find it all amusing, and hold down a managerial role in IT without the slightest anxiety.
Unfortunately there have been too many negative comments about loners; and society being what it is, too often people believe that all loners are psychos.
When a person is comfortable with who they are and their lifestyle, and isn't wanting to blow away humanity - they shouldn't give a rat's patootie what anyone else thinks.
If we want to critique other's life choices, Why not question those who can't seem to stay at home for more than 20 minutes and are consumed with going out way too often? How about a person who claims they can't stand to be alone? Does that make them emotionally ill by not being able to spend time alone?
Stand down.
The thread asked about "recluses," which is different from "loners."
If it's your choice to avoid people, fine. At some point, for the types of recluses decribed here, "won't" became "can't."
My husband's cousin does not leave her house and won't let anyone see her. She was a teacher who worked with special-needs children, and one day at work she just started crying and never stopped. Her husband had to come take her home. She hasn't left their house since then, except for medical appointments. She doesn't come to funerals or family events. She deleted her Facebook account and she doesn't answer her phone. She's been like that for a few years now.
I've got the winking comments/jokes from men. I am part of an online deaf group.
I just feel so out of place with people. Growing up from my teen years and on, I hardly talked to anyone, not even at school. I kept to myself. Never had one close friend to do things with once I was in high schhol. Jr, high was somewhat like that too. That was around the time my favorite chilhood friend decided not to have much to do with me anymore. We rarely spoke or seen each other.
For years and years, I was stuck in a rut of working in retail. Living in the country where houses were scattered, I didn't talk to ANYONE except at work and my parents since I lived with them. I rarely went anywhere fun in my 20's.
Then my favorite childhood friend settled down in our hometown. Wanting to get out of the rut but didn't know where and how to turn, I took advantage of her kindness inviting myself to her home all the time. I then became very unhappy with myself because I've missed out on so much in my younger years and 20's. That and hating working in retail. Instead of being honest with my feelings and not having confidence at the time to quit a crappy job, I attempted suicide.
The retail job I've worked for many years took a toll on me and few years later I did quit
Awww well you did alot. Retail IS tough. I had a deaf employee in my pet store and people were so obnoxious about him. When I signed to translate what we were discussing in front of him, they'd say "I'm not deaf I don't need sign language".
I consider myself somewhat of a recluse, one that prefers to be alone most of the time interacting with others IRL once in awhile.
I've always been self-conscious of my looks and the way I am. In my younger days, being quite short made me look younger than I really was. I've always hated my voice. Along with my shortness, my voice made it hard for some to understand me as I struggle to speak well while dealing with being hard-of-hearing. My eyes don't appear the same. One doesn't blink well giving the appearance of winking at others and getting teased for it even in my adult years...
I've always been socially awkward.... Meds n therapy only help so much...
A roommate I had from summer 2010 until summer 2012. He stayed in his room or in his basement lab ALL THE TIME. Even when his friends asked to go somewhere, he'd rather stay cooped in.
I've got the winking comments/jokes from men. I am part of an online deaf group.
I just feel so out of place with people. Growing up from my teen years and on, I hardly talked to anyone, not even at school. I kept to myself. Never had one close friend to do things with once I was in high schhol. Jr, high was somewhat like that too. That was around the time my favorite chilhood friend decided not to have much to do with me anymore. We rarely spoke or seen each other.
For years and years, I was stuck in a rut of working in retail. Living in the country where houses were scattered, I didn't talk to ANYONE except at work and my parents since I lived with them. I rarely went anywhere fun in my 20's.
Then my favorite childhood friend settled down in our hometown. Wanting to get out of the rut but didn't know where and how to turn, I took advantage of her kindness inviting myself to her home all the time. I then became very unhappy with myself because I've missed out on so much in my younger years and 20's. That and hating working in retail. Instead of being honest with my feelings and not having confidence at the time to quit a crappy job, I attempted suicide.
The retail job I've worked for many years took a toll on me and few years later I did quit
Just because someone choose to live a certain way doesn't mean its wrong.
Why don't you take one trip to the library to check out a book about careers? I don't think that's asking too much.
I consider myself somewhat of a recluse, one that prefers to be alone most of the time interacting with others IRL once in awhile.
I've always been self-conscious of my looks and the way I am. In my younger days, being quite short made me look younger than I really was. I've always hated my voice. Along with my shortness, my voice made it hard for some to understand me as I struggle to speak well while dealing with being hard-of-hearing. My eyes don't appear the same. One doesn't blink well giving the appearance of winking at others and getting teased for it even in my adult years...
I've always been socially awkward.... Meds n therapy only help so much...
I'm not socially awkward, but, like you, I am self conscious about my height (although I like the rest of myself). Despite this, I work in a very people-oriented field and I like dealing with people on a professional basis. I no longer like social situations (which I used to like very much).
I would consider myself a recluse, despite the fact that I have a lot of friends. I just prefer being alone. And I'm rarely lonely these days.
OP, it doesn't sound like you're a recluse. You may not even be introverted. You just severely lack confidence.
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