How did you tell your parents you're moving out? (girlfriend, children, adults)

[Hedgehog_Mom]

I knew I was moving out because I came home from work and my belongings were thrown in the front yard.

My husband found out that he was moving out when he turned 18 and child support stopped. His mom kicked him out then and he didn't talk to her for 15 years. So being Hispanic didn't make her want him to stay until he got married.

My kids will be welcome to live in my house until they get married. I would prefer them not having boyfriends or spouses move in with them, but we'll review that on a case-by-case basis (mostly whether or not my husband can tolerate the guy). I've told them that they're welcome to move out any time after they graduate from high school, but that it makes sense to live here during college if they go to a local college, and even after they graduate from college, so they can save up a down payment for a house. I made sure I picked a house with big enough bedrooms to fit adult-sized beds and dressers, and the kids' bedrooms are down a separate hallway so it already feels like their own section of the house.

As far as telling your parents that you're moving out, are you planning to marry your boyfriend at some point? Your parents would probably be less resistant to the idea of you living with a man if the two of you were engaged.

[jtab4994]

I forget when/how I told them. It was 30 years ago.

However I do remember my grandmother crying when I actually moved my stuff out.

[High_Plains_Retired]

After I left for the Air Force in 1968, I never went back home except to visit.

Interestingly the Air Force never seemed to think I was receiving any type financial support from my parents and treated me as an adult. However after my military service and although I was four years older than the normal student, the college I attended assumed I had parental support and required that I prove with records that I did not. Two worlds for sure. One expects to deal with young adults and one expects to deal with children.

[theluckygal]

Originally Posted by Solhildaaa

Did your parents care? Did they support you in going out to find an "adventure" with your life?

My parents cared a lot so I had a really tough time convincing them to let me go. I never lived on my own & I was migrating to usa for higher studies so I can understand how hard it must have been for them. I had to bring in other family & friends as well to support my case. It wasn't easy at all. Took me several months to get their permission. Now they are very proud of me & are happy that I am on my own. I think American culture is perfect where they send off kids to college & encourage them to survive on their own. It builds a lot of self-esteem & confidence. Being over-protective stunts your kid's growth. Other cultures don't understand this & see it as a sign of indifference & negligence to leave the kids on their own. So you end up with an adult child who cant survive without adult supervision, doesn't lose their innocence & ends up getting easily manipulated by others. After kids grow up even parents deserve some peace & quiet. They need their privacy & extra income to take better care of themselves.

I would say just tell them you are moving out. No explanations needed. Don't give into the emotional blackmailing. Moving away doesn't mean you stop loving them or wont visit them. Tell them you will make time to keep in touch regularly. You need to spread your wings & fly. Its the most important step you will take towards building a better future. All the best.

[kevxu]

"I'm leaving next Tuesday for New York."

[Chemistry_Guy]

Less than three weeks after my 18th birthday I went away to college. While I went home on breaks, I never moved back home and my stuff stayed in my apartment. My parents asked me if I wanted to move home upon graduation, but I was able to line up my job and apartment such that I only had to sleep on a couch with all of my belongings in a pickup truck for three nights.

[Koale]

How did I tell my parents I was moving out? I didn't, they told me...
Koale

[shortel]

When I got my first real job and after a few months my father told me to pay rent or move out. By the weekend I had a moving truck rented and was on my way out. He was very surprised but there was no way I was paying him rent.

[aneye4detail]

My parents had kids and grandkids in their home since 1959. So in 1989, when I was 22 and moving out, my parents said, don't let the door hitchya on the way out. Although as Catholics they were not happy I was shacking up with my boyfriend.

[ss20ts]

I said I'm moving out. That was it.