Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Rise above and don't ever use half joking snarky comments . I'd be happy if my step daughter just liked me, I do more , tend to and encourage her more than either of her parents. To her I'll always be the woman that took her dad away from her ( my husband had been divorced 5 years when we met )
Then years before that we had the "Christmas of the Ashley's" . 3 out of 4 of my sons all had girlfriends named Ashley they brought and they all hated one another !!!
That was certainly exciting !!!
We don't do Christmas anymore except for our last teen at home and us and we go to Denny's .
The Ashley's all left on their own at varying times and my 30 yr old step daughter finally got a new boyfriend and POOF disappeared ?? Again , I am the only one who has tried to email or text to see if she is alright . She won't answer her dad . They still live in Europe so there is no telling where she is and no one seems to be disturbed by it so I just roll with it .
Next week I swear I am moving in with Aunt Bea, Andy and Opie !!!!
So, because she is his child, she should be able to insult her half brother, say mean things about my daughters, openly critique our home, decor, etc? What planet do you people live on?
I wouldn't act like that to someone I DON'T like, much less my step-parent & elder.
Your the one calling it YOUR house. Curious as to why it is not also your husband's house... Does he live in the backyard shed? Does he not deserve to have a place where his daughter can come visit and feel welcomed?
And don't say you make her feel welcomed, serving food she does not like and not having enough chairs for her and her fiancee to sit with the other adults, is not making someone feel welcomed. So, yes you do seem to act like that to someone you don't like, especially your step-daughter.
I didn't read the entire thread, so I don't know if my take on this has been discussed to death already.
I think your step-daughter was rude to bring food from Taco Bell. She should have eaten the food that you and your MIL prepared, and skipped the ham. Bringing her own food was a way of rejecting your hospitality.
That said, she is 22yo, and her behavior is not entirely unusual for that age--rude, but not unusual. Hopefully as she gets older and more mature, her behavior will improve. I would just ignore her bringing the Taco Bell food. I'd talk to my husband about it later, though, so that HE could tell her that was inappropriate and not to do it again.
The problem with the seating was your fault. You should have had seats to accommodate everyone. Even if she was arriving a bit later, you should have had enough seating for them to join the group when they arrived. Where was she and her fiancé supposed to sit? Did you expect them to stand while you sat and continued eating with the rest of the family?
I see a third wife in the husbands future if the wife doesn't allow his children over to their house... Oh, wait, I mean her house.
You people are insane. I've never said she wasn't welcome. She had a chair at the table for Dinner (I ended up at the island), she brought Taco Bell & ate what she wanted, and her grandmother is the one who was in charge of bringing "the meat". But somehow I was awful???
Must be a lot of bitter ex-wives on this board whose ex husbands married younger, more attractive women & had more kids.
You people are insane. I've never said she wasn't welcome. She had a chair at the table for Dinner (I ended up at the island), she brought Taco Bell & ate what she wanted, and her grandmother is the one who was in charge of bringing "the meat". But somehow I was awful???
Must be a lot of bitter ex-wives on this board whose ex husbands married younger, more attractive women & had more kids.
I AM the second wife, and I think you are behaving like a child. She is young, hurt, and feeling like she is not really part of her dad's new family. You have to be the bigger person. If she was trying to offend you and ruin your holiday, she won. You should have smiled, made her welcome, and just let it go. Once you take away someone's power to affect your mood, they usually give up. Sadly, the two of you need to get along, and the way BOTH of you are going it won't happen anytime soon.
You people are insane. I've never said she wasn't welcome. She had a chair at the table for Dinner (I ended up at the island), she brought Taco Bell & ate what she wanted, and her grandmother is the one who was in charge of bringing "the meat". But somehow I was awful???
She had a chair at the table only because she apparently took the one you were going to use. You already said much earlier in this thread that there were just enough chairs before step daughter and her fiance arrived. Not having enough chairs set out for guests is rude. You said you expected her to just go off and find her own chair to use. Since you were the hostess, it was your job to make sure there were enough chairs for everyone and not just assume that your step daughter would wait to eat until everyone else was done.
Also, as a hostess it is your responsibility to make sure everyone has something to eat. Yes, grandmother was the one bringing the ham, but that doesn't mean you couldn't make a small chicken or another meat dish. There are no rules that only one person is allowed to cook the meat...
Quote:
Must be a lot of bitter ex-wives on this board whose ex husbands married younger, more attractive women & had more kids.
Or a lot of people who know how to be good hosts...
You people are insane. I've never said she wasn't welcome. She had a chair at the table for Dinner (I ended up at the island)
That's how it went down, but certainly not how you planned it. There weren't enough chairs or room for *all* adults to sit at the same kitchen table at the same time. She took your seat, which appeared to be 'open,' and angered you. You said you assumed someone would have been finished by the time she arrived and that would have opened up a spot -or- she & fiance could have sat at the large island with the younger kids, where there was room.
Quote:
she brought Taco Bell & ate what she wanted, and her grandmother is the one who was in charge of bringing "the meat". But somehow I was awful???
Was grandma insulted at her not eating the ham? Did grandma care one way or the other? Who all was pissed off at her bringing Taco Bell to the dinner (besides you)? What did your husband say when you spoke about it to him later?
And more importantly, how are you going to manage holiday dinners at your house in the future? You need a plan so you can prevent ending up pissed off.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
