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So, who has been paying your tuition? Do you take all or most of your meals at home? Is space limited, as in others needing to use the bathroom, etc.? All of these things can contribute to resentment of younger siblings who might just want some space of their own. Try to focus on the advantages you've been given. No one is beating on you (are they?),
you have not had to work or pay your own way so far. It's not as easy as you think out in the real world.
Thank you all who gave me good advise. I very much appreciate it. I guess the bottom line and the point Im trying to make is it's hard to understand people who are mean to you when you have done nothing wrong to them. I don't know why my sisters are just rude to me out of the blue and my mother as well.
Is it possible your mother is frustrated with you and vents about it to your sisters? Maybe they are speaking up for her because she won't do it for herself. Is there a consistent theme to these issues? If so, examine how you may be contributing. In other words, if the fighting is always about messiness, try work on that.
It's your mother's home. She's letting you live there at 30 when she has no obligation to do so. Try to make your presence as stress free for her as possible.
[quote=UNC4Me;44199207]Is it possible your mother is frustrated with you and vents about it to your sisters? Maybe they are speaking up for her because she won't do it for herself. Is there a consistent theme to these issues? If so, examine how you may be contributing. In other words, if the fighting is always about messiness, try work on that.
It's your mother's home. She's letting you live there at 30 when she has no obligation to do so. Try to make your presence as stress free for her as possible.
Oh brother.
Do you know what triangulation is? An adult mom can speak for herself -- not through her other kids. That's just wrong that she would talk badly about one kid to the others.
Mean, abusive people can find any -- any -- reason to attack: you made broccoli? You know I hate broccoli! You left the tricycle in the driveway! You took the last towel and I needed it for a shower! What?! You ate the last cookie. You're breathing my air! You're so selfish.
That's what abusive people do. They justify their anger as in, "you made me mad!" If you were a better/cleaner/skinnier/less sensitive/whatever person, I wouldn't be so mad at you.
That's how abusive people roll, people! Look up the "abuse cycle."
Come on! Even if your parents were good, haven't any of you had a rotten boss? Or neighbor? Or friend?
I am one step closer to completely cutting ties with my family, however easier said than done. I am 30 years old in college ALMOST DONE! ready and so anxious to embark on this new journey and freedom my life will take me once I have graduated college. I still live at home with my mom and dad because unfortunately, I simply cannot afford to move out on my own at this time and I do not have any friends I could live with either. I am a pretty lonely person but I do not let it get me down unless I wish I had some sort of friend or escape I can go to when it comes to dealing with my family.
My sisters are horrible to me. They like to gang up and blame me for everyone's problems. The thing is, I don't do anything! I have spent time with myself figuring out if I have done anything on my end to make them treat me like this and I can honestly say with all my heart, I haven't. My mom takes their side ALWAYS. They could call me every name in the book, say that I am a failure, yell, whatever, and my mom will blame me for it and never my sisters. My sisters get away with everything. I am so sick and tired of being treated like this. I cannot sit down with any of them and tell them how I feel because again, they will put the blame on me instead of listening to me and try to make an attempt as to how I feel. If anything it will make the situation worse. I do not see any resolution in sight for this. I am STRONGLY considering once I have graduated college and get a job to cut off ties with them completely. I have dealt with this long enough and I can't do it anymore. Any support or advise to anyone on here that is in or has gone through the same experience I am going through right now is greatly appreciated.
Just relax. Very soon this dude is going to come by and see if a glass slipper he found fits your foot, and when it does, your troubles are over for good.
I am sorry maybe I misunderstood.....you have supported yourself since 16? So you paid rent, groceries, utilities, etc....or did your parents? I understand you are working and paying for school yourself and that is GREAT!!! BUT your parents are still supporting you and by doing so you can afford to go to school. They deserve some consideration for that.
Wait until you are out of the house and self supporting before you make any decisions. And try to remember that without your parents support you could not afford that education.
I come from a poor family. I fund my own college education, work part time to feed myself and pay my own bills which are not much just an internet and phone bill.
My sisters and mom all talk bad about me. The second they came home from the beach they all ganged up on me out of the blue for no apparent reason. I just have a hard time understanding what there problem is with me when I do not do anything to them personally.
I am one step closer to completely cutting ties with my family, however easier said than done. I am 30 years old in college ALMOST DONE! ready and so anxious to embark on this new journey and freedom my life will take me once I have graduated college. I still live at home with my mom and dad because unfortunately, I simply cannot afford to move out on my own at this time and I do not have any friends I could live with either. I am a pretty lonely person but I do not let it get me down unless I wish I had some sort of friend or escape I can go to when it comes to dealing with my family.
My sisters are horrible to me. They like to gang up and blame me for everyone's problems. The thing is, I don't do anything! I have spent time with myself figuring out if I have done anything on my end to make them treat me like this and I can honestly say with all my heart, I haven't. My mom takes their side ALWAYS. They could call me every name in the book, say that I am a failure, yell, whatever, and my mom will blame me for it and never my sisters. My sisters get away with everything. I am so sick and tired of being treated like this. I cannot sit down with any of them and tell them how I feel because again, they will put the blame on me instead of listening to me and try to make an attempt as to how I feel. If anything it will make the situation worse. I do not see any resolution in sight for this. I am STRONGLY considering once I have graduated college and get a job to cut off ties with them completely. I have dealt with this long enough and I can't do it anymore. Any support or advise to anyone on here that is in or has gone through the same experience I am going through right now is greatly appreciated.
I'm going to go off this post and nothing else. There's some big assumptions about the OP in this thread.
1) Obviously there is a lot the OP isn't telling us. I'm not gonna make up other stuff in my head to try to fill in the gaps.
2) Thirty is too old to live with mom unless you are paying rent to her. And if you aren't paying rent and your rooms a mess besides, then that is inexcusable and disrespectful. It really doesn't matter if you go to school or not. You may be someone that has worked very hard since they were 16, but it isn't the same thing as having to support yourself.
3) You say you don't have friends you can go live with. I have plenty of friends myself, but not friends I can just go live with because I want to go to school and need to live cheap and take their support to do it. Who has friends like that? You can only take advantage of parents in this way. Friends are there for you temporarily if your house burns down or something like that.
4) I think to cut off your mom that has given you a place to live and supported you through getting an education would be a slap in the face to her. She doesn't owe you a room to live in and I think you should consider it a gift.
... going to school full time and working part time is extremely hard and right now....
Why?
It's hard for everyone, but most people your age have some kind of living situation that doesn't involve their parents figured out.
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