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Well you don't cut off from your parents because that one thing is because of your parents you would not exist on this earth. And secondly you can be any age and you listen to your folks. Sometimes you need assurance from them because they were around before you came
Oh yes you can.
I did it and am better off for it
I HAD to get my assurance from my counselor due to BOTH my folks.
There are LOTS of people that have been here longer than you that can assure you if you need it and in a positive way .
My dad is LONG dead( The original Don Draper of Mad Men - same era too ) and had a second family when he was way older and more settled down and mom was a wild beautiful eccentric trainwreck with too much inherited $$ and did not know the word no . I loved her but feel more sorry for her . She was one glittering, glamorous, handful alright .I would have had a psychotic break had I had to deal with her much longer . FINALLY with the support of my husband and counselor we had one good last talk on the phone .
She never even knew, no fights no drama . I never saw nor heard from her again until her ashes were delivered to my house 10 years later last August .
She ran off everyone . Even my sister wasn't shaken up when she ( OR our dad) died and calls her by her first name.
You CAN do this on your own and you will feel so much better after awhile. No one can make you , you have to be to that point . You seem to be doing fine with the exception of this issue with your mother.
If I could buy a house again of my choosing I would LOVE to have one from the 40's - 70's EASY. I am SO jealous ,, I bet your house is cool .
EH, it's none of her business. An old Alanon slogan, too, is what she thinks is none of your business (or why she thinks it). You don't need to worry about why she's acting this way because it's her problem. It sucks to have a parent act like a child. RIght now, she's stone-walling you as a way of making you pay for not including her. She is hurt and now she's lashing out by shutting off emotions and care. VERY immature. She'll come around at some point and you can tell her or write to her that her behavior really hurt you. She may be narcissistic too, look it up, and then she won't be able to even comprehend why her actions hurt you because she may be just too wrapped up in herself to "get it."
MOw that lawn and love that house. She can keep acting like a 12 year old brat if she wants.
Wow. I am with Grandview Gloria. This appears a textbook case of narcissitic personality disorder. Their life blood is to control your emotions. Likely even your Dad cannot stand up to her. I am so sorry you have a mother like that. For you to be upset is an understatement. Parents don't act this way towards their child for not consulting them and obtaining advice upon buying a home. This doesn't get better, it is not normal.It's horrific. Appreciate your Dad, she probably hates he is talking to you.
Oh yes you can.
I did it and am better off for it
I HAD to get my assurance from my counselor due to BOTH my folks.
There are LOTS of people that have been here longer than you that can assure you if you need it and in a positive way .
My dad is LONG dead( The original Don Draper of Mad Men - same era too ) and had a second family when he was way older and more settled down and mom was a wild beautiful eccentric trainwreck with too much inherited $$ and did not know the word no . I loved her but feel more sorry for her . She was one glittering, glamorous, handful alright .I would have had a psychotic break had I had to deal with her much longer . FINALLY with the support of my husband and counselor we had one good last talk on the phone .
She never even knew, no fights no drama . I never saw nor heard from her again until her ashes were delivered to my house 10 years later last August .
She ran off everyone . Even my sister wasn't shaken up when she ( OR our dad) died and calls her by her first name.
You CAN do this on your own and you will feel so much better after awhile. No one can make you , you have to be to that point . You seem to be doing fine with the exception of this issue with your mother.
If I could buy a house again of my choosing I would LOVE to have one from the 40's - 70's EASY. I am SO jealous ,, I bet your house is cool .
Well I see your point . What was the driver as I mention this one SOB that is friends with my folks feed my moms brain with BS that the seller took me for a ride. That they were an old couple just waiting for a sucker to sell their so called junk house and they run off with the money.
First of all I dealt with the sellers and the neighbors told me that the couple are the original owners of when the house was build back in the 1970svsnd they took care of the place. They in fact added on a new and mind you an expensive roof 2 years ago. I gave the papers yo prove it. They fold the house because the husband was already old and it was getting too much for the couple to handle plus he was in and out of the hospital for medical issues. And they moved to a townhome. But this SOB that my folks know is a cheap person. He is retired and widowed. He is now a big spender with one woman he is saying. He buys an expensive car with all the bells and whistles but too cheap to buy a lawnmower and a decent lawnmower.
I have done so much to my home already without any help from anyone and the house is turning out great.?if I end up seeing this SOB I really feel like giving him a piece of my mind . Should I do it because I really want to lay it into him big time and at this point I don't care if my folks get mad at me if I give this SOB a piece of my mind.
Yes the house looks awesome. Looks like my mom does have a mental problem.
I end up seeing this SOB I really feel like giving him a piece of my mind . Should I do it because I really want to lay it into him big time and at this point I don't care if my folks get mad at me if I give this SOB a piece of my mind.
It would just be a waste of your time and energy. Nothing you say will make him think he did something wrong or make him change his behavior. It would just be adding to the drama. IMO it's best to just ignore it and not give him any attention.
It would just be a waste of your time and energy. Nothing you say will make him think he did something wrong or make him change his behavior. It would just be adding to the drama. IMO it's best to just ignore it and not give him any attention.
So basically if comes up to me and says hello, just act like he doesn't exist in front of me and don't say a word to him?
So basically if comes up to me and says hello, just act like he doesn't exist in front of me and don't say a word to him?
No, you don't take the child's way out...you handle it like an adult.
Let him know you are not happy with the way he betrayed your confidence. Because of this, you are not willing to trust him with anything similar in the future.
And then move on.
I like this quote:
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."
So basically if comes up to me and says hello, just act like he doesn't exist in front of me and don't say a word to him?
Why, at this point in your life, do you not know how to interact with other adults?
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