Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Lots of responses on here. I get that kids take up time and should be the priority, it just seems that so many I know don't do ANYTHING at all that doesn't involve their kids. Not saying it's bad, just curious why that is.
Lots of responses on here. I get that kids take up time and should be the priority, it just seems that so many I know don't do ANYTHING at all that doesn't involve their kids. Not saying it's bad, just curious why that is.
I think some just end up losing their identity. Like how when someone gets into a relationship, and they drop everything (friends, going out, hobbies, etc.).
I think some just end up losing their identity. Like how when someone gets into a relationship, and they drop everything (friends, going out, hobbies, etc.).
To me, it's NOT a healthy way to live whatsoever.
Some people do and that is sad. I have seen that happen with friends.
I mentioned earlier that my wife and I socialize less, but for us it is more a result of pure exhaustion. When our kids are older and can do things like dress and bathe themselves I look forward to having a little more energy for fun.
Someone else mentioned that I wouldn't have any of this freedom until the kids are grown. This is where I agree more with you. My wife and I don't plan on over scheduling our kids the way so many people seem to these days. While we will provide a loving and supportive home we will also make it clear that they aren't the center of the universe.
I didn't mention in my first post that the good friend I still see the most is actually childless. That being said we don't go out to bars together or anything like that anymore. He is happy to come over to our house for dinner and to watch a game and drink some beers. My wife and I are pretty relaxed and are more than happy when he stays after the kids go to bed, so we do get adult time. The understanding here though is that if we go to his house we can't really stay past 8:30 or 9 since we have to get the kids to bed.
I socialise with childless people. It depends on the person, though. Once I went to a meetup group and in the first ten minutes the facilitator made sure to mention how she hated people talking about their kids. Not interested in that sort of group. I'll bet she would have been offended if I said I wasn't interested in hearing about her dog.
Now, one excellent friend is childless and we have a great time at the playground, my kids play and we chat about all sorts of things, including my kids and her dog. That's because she is a great person who just happens to not enjoy young children, not an ogre.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ss20ts
I don't have kids. I can count on one hand how many friends I have with children. What do we have in common? We're not at kids concerts, games, etc. I don't want to hear all about little Johnny every conversation. I want to do adult things and have adult conversations. Our lives don't revolve around the same thing and that's ok.
Many people with small children also don't have time to hang out with friends. When they do quite often it's more that the kids are getting together to play or whatever.
If you brought kids to my house, it would be a nightmare for all of us. My house is far from child proof.....breakables all over. I have really nice furniture that people aren't allowed to put their feet on....no shoes on my sofa or coffee table....actually shoes aren't allowed in my house. No jumping on my furniture. No running around my house....it's not a gym or a playground. I also have absolutely noting for children to play with. I mean they could play with sticks in the backyard, but something tells me that wouldn't go over well and it could be a disaster with a doctor's visit. We don't even have a game system and don't give out our wifi password so we're a party for young adults and teens.
Who doesn't give their wifi password to guests?
We get our kids together to play as a way to meet people, it is an excellent way to meet people! and because it would cost ridiculous amounts of money to hire babysitters.
My guess is the childless people are childless by choice (not always so please don't jump on me about your sister's cousin's friend who is infertile) and if they don't have kids they don't want to hear about little Cayden or Madison every minute you are together. They don't want you to bring your precious ones to their house to make a mess on their adult furniture and they don't want to end a night early because you have to relieve the babysitter.
Once you become a parent your focus changes and that's the way it should be. People without children don't get it so I can certainly understand why people without kids prefer to socialize with others without them.
We were invited to a BBQ last Saturday. Nice couple in their barely 30s, kids 3 and 5 and three other couples I counted ten kids under 10. It was impossible to have a conversation.
"Never" is a strong word. We've socialized with people with and w/o kids over the years. In general, it is kind of easier when people are all on the same page (having to, or not having to worry about child care).
We have many shorties in our life and I would rather socialize with the shorties vs some of the parents
Yes it's true. Don't make me come over there lest I unleash inner child on you. Be afraid, be very afraid. She makes me do things no adult would ever allow their child to do. Circus peanuts for breakfast. Are you serious spoiled brat.
We met some new friends with an adorable 6 year old autistic boy that has to be tube fed every two hours because he won't eat. I was seriously worried that he wouldn't be uncomfortable in our spooky old house full of spooky old antiques. He is difficult to interact with but as soon as he saw that Yorkie crying to get near him, he was just like any other kid that comes to our house. His mother asked him if he was ready to go home and he said "No." Sweet. Inner child comes through again. He's just as animal crazy as I am.
One of my besties grand daughter just had a first birthday and I got to spend some quality time with her 4 year old sister in a princess bouncy house.
If you have kids or animals in your house when I come to visit you may find me sitting at the kid table for dinner or in the aviary playing with your parrots like I was at besties house for her grand daughters birthday party. They have two dogs as well Poor John. I seriously need to leave him at home and go by myself. He was way out of his comfort zone.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
