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Location: Stuck on the East Coast, hoping to head West
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Haha, I'm definitely going to just start thanking them. The neighbor says things to me ALL the time and I'm usually wondering what his point his. Yup, I cut my hair. Yeah, it's blonder now. And?
I guess my point is that when I compliment someone, I just come out and say it. I wouldn't go up to someone and say, "you got new shoes" and leave it at that. I would say, "I like your shoes" and wait for them to thank me.
This seems like a pretty normal way to try to make a positive engagement with another human....
I do empathize with your thinking something can be 'passive-aggressive', but coming from experience I would advise you to doubt yourself....not everyone is trying to be rude
I'd say something like yep I did! That's usually my go to when people vocalize very blatantly obvious observations. I'll usually add in some little piece too like oh I got it done at such and such salon.
Not sure exactly how to word this, but how do you handle people who are either being intentionally vague/random or passive aggressive?
Examples:
I ran into my neighbor and he said, "wow, Bande1102, you cut your hair!" and then nothing. I ran into him again and he said, "wow, your is blonde!" and then nothing. It's weird b/c he'll keep standing there and wait for a response. I usually attempt to walk away and then he'll attempt to engage me about a real issue (a favor, wants to borrow something, etc).
I was at the pool and an acquaintance (I barely know her) said, "hey, Bande1102, I love your suit. I think one piece suits are more flattering".
Usually, I ignore them; but I'd love to have some witty comeback or something. I just don't get them. My compliments are honest and if I don't have something meaningful or nice to say, I stay quiet.
Well... perhaps your neighbor is being honest and just saying what is coming into their head? And they just seem to be simple observations not fake compliments. And would you think them rude if they totally ignored your any changes to your hairstyle?
I think that you are slightly miffed because they didn't compliment your new hair cut or hair colour. Maybe those changes weren't as wonderful as you think they are.
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