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I don't keep in contact with my extended family members anymore. When I had seen any of them in the past 5 years, it had been because of attending funerals. I haven't initiated contact at all through phone, email, or anything else. I just don't want to.
I am barely on social media. I only had a linkedin and my aunt requested to add me there. I ignored. Then I had a blank facebook, I just used for the messaging. She sent a friend request. I also had a cousin I stopped talking to several years ago, who randomly tries to contact me. I completely ignore.
I don't know why they can't just respect that I am not interested in being in contact with them. I feel like this is at least on some level of harassment, not that I consider it illegal harassment, just them not respecting that I don't wish to be in contact. My reasons are mostly due to their pushiness and gossiping.
Maybe I'm just venting. I don't know what I can do besides ignore. I'm not going to message them and tell them to not bother me.
I don't keep in contact with my extended family members anymore. When I had seen any of them in the past 5 years, it had been because of attending funerals. I haven't initiated contact at all through phone, email, or anything else. I just don't want to.
I am barely on social media. I only had a linkedin and my aunt requested to add me there. I ignored. Then I had a blank facebook, I just used for the messaging. She sent a friend request. I also had a cousin I stopped talking to several years ago, who randomly tries to contact me. I completely ignore.
I don't know why they can't just respect that I am not interested in being in contact with them. I feel like this is at least on some level of harassment, not that I consider it illegal harassment, just them not respecting that I don't wish to be in contact. My reasons are mostly due to their pushiness and gossiping.
Maybe I'm just venting. I don't know what I can do besides ignore. I'm not going to message them and tell them to not bother me.
Have you told them specifically that you don't want any further contact with them? If not, then you probably should do so. Until then, you can't really get annoyed if they try to stay in contact.
Have you told them specifically that you don't want any further contact with them? If not, then you probably should do so. Until then, you can't really get annoyed if they try to stay in contact.
I was going to ask the same thing. Did you just distance yourself or let them know you have no interest? I don't know your history, but it is nice to have family reach out to you.
I guess you guys are right. I should tell them, if it's an issue for me that I don't want them to contact me.
I was never close to the aunt. I didn't know her while growing up. I have only seen her at family gatherings, which don't happen anymore. So I don't think it should be a big deal if I don't stay in contact.
As for my cousin, we used to hang out for a few years. But not for maybe 7 years. She's super pushy. If I didn't say yes to one of her invitations, then she would argue with me about it. I'd keep on giving the reasons why I would pass on certain invitations (to nothing important), and if I pressed further on declining she would act offended. So I ended up just not answering her calls...forever. There's that and that she's a huge gossip. My father did tell her just to leave me alone a few years ago. That was nice of him.
I don't keep in contact with my extended family members anymore. When I had seen any of them in the past 5 years, it had been because of attending funerals. I haven't initiated contact at all through phone, email, or anything else. I just don't want to.
I am barely on social media. I only had a linkedin and my aunt requested to add me there. I ignored. Then I had a blank sm page , I just used for the messaging. She sent a friend request. I also had a cousin I stopped talking to several years ago, who randomly tries to contact me. I completely ignore.
I don't know why they can't just respect that I am not interested in being in contact with them. I feel like this is at least on some level of harassment, not that I consider it illegal harassment, just them not respecting that I don't wish to be in contact. My reasons are mostly due to their pushiness and gossiping.
Maybe I'm just venting. I don't know what I can do besides ignore. I'm not going to message them and tell them to not bother me.
"I'm not going to message them and tell them to not bother me."...AND that is the reason they still keep doing it.Why don't you just tell them you don't want them contacting you and the reason why??That way they will stop and you will not have to be dealing with it anymore.
Last edited by Miss Blue; 10-19-2016 at 06:24 AM..
You sound pretty cold. I am sure you'll have no problems telling them you want to be left alone.
I don't have much contact to my extended family, maybe once a year, but I find it rather normal to want to stay connected within your own blood. I think it is neither wrong nor harassment, it is human nature. If you don't want to participate, fine, but I find your statement pretty mean.
I am not connected with any family members through facebook either. You can change your facebook settings so nobody can contact you. Or simply block them without sending them an offensive message.
You sound pretty cold. I am sure you'll have no problems telling them you want to be left alone.
I don't have much contact to my extended family, maybe once a year, but I find it rather normal to want to stay connected within your own blood. I think it is neither wrong nor harassment, it is human nature. If you don't want to participate, fine, but I find your statement pretty mean.
I am not connected with any family members through social media either. You can change your facebook settings so nobody can contact you. Or simply block them without sending them an offensive message.
I guess it can be seen as cold. But I didn't grow up knowing them. My parents kept me away from them until my late teens, even though they lived in the same area. So they never really felt like family.
Last edited by Miss Blue; 10-19-2016 at 06:26 AM..
I don't think it's necessarily cold. It sounds like you have good reason for keeping them out of your life, and your parent's must have thought so too. If ignoring doesn't discourage them, you may just have to tell them straight out, as has been suggested. I had a similar situation with one relative, and nothing worked until I wrote a brief letter saying I was not interested in contact with her. Some relatives can be toxic.
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