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Great advice on this thread. I work from home too but joined a business club, where I have made some contacts but mainly friends. Aside from Meetups, I recently joined Rotary. Great way to meet people as well as give back to the community and the world.
Sometimes old friends will let you down and it hurts. You have to shake it off and change gears.
You can make new friends and work from home if you can find a group of people who share common interests. It could be as ordinary as finding a sewing or knitting center, a book or garden club, taking ceramics classes, being a docent in a museum, or even getting your husband out and learning to dance. You can attend Rotary Club, feed the hungry, volunteer at your local library, or join a church. Join a neighborhood Facebook page, rescue stray animals, attend Audubon meetings, take a women’s self defense class and go to the Y.
Don’t sit at home or waste time shopping. Get out and try new things. Walking is a great idea!
OP...Lots of good suggestions in this post. I would also suggest that you give it time....4 months is not long enough to decide to throw in the towel and look for a traditional job....rather than your work from home....Especially since you like it and your boss.
Explore the options for volunteer opportunities, group activities that you can join, etc. Does your hubby also have a new job....with new co-workers? That is opportunity to get together with co-workers, etc.
Give it at least a year....If you still hate it....then think about a traditional job.
As far as your friend....To have a friend be a friend.....she obviously isn't being reciprocal......but perhaps you'll give her some space to work that out. Stop relying on her, and perhaps also stop being so available. Maybe if you give her time to really miss you, she'll put it into perspective.
Sounds like presently her travel revolves around her long distance boyfriend....Otherwise I'd suggest meeting half way for dinner, shopping, movie or coffee dates.
Put things into perspective. How often did you do things with her prior to your move? Was she traveling to see her boyfriend then?? Was your time together more happen chance then planned? Maybe you should drive to visit her?
Since moving 4 months ago, my best friend...or so I thought,has not come to visit me, has bailed on the last 4 times she was supposed to meet up with me and really only calls when she has an issue. I haven't really heard from my other friends either (but not as close). It has really made me examine our friendship and now in retrospect, I see it was more one-sided.
My husband says she has always been that way and I am just seeing it. It just sucks to know you don't mean as much to some people as you thought. My husband also said that I'm a little depressed because I am not meeting people because I work from home. I had another job offer, but I really like my job and my boss,but I'm not sure its good for me.
I just really need some advice on how to let go and move forward. Transitions are not alwayseasy.
Yeah...it does suck. I had friends that blew off my wedding. Friends that I thought would be happy for me and want to celebrate the day with me...and just blew it off with no explanation. Not until a couple of years later. And the explanation was sucky too. lol
I think your husband is giving you good advice. OFTEN, transisitions are difficult. How far away from your friend did you move?
Moving, even under happy circumstances, is stressful. Takes a while for your house to feel like home, having to learn a new neighborhood, new shopping areas, if you have kids, getting them established in school, dealing with their sadness about leaving their friends...it's all a lot. You don't have your new routines down yet.
You know...maybe you could invite one of your new neighbor over for coffee sometime? I know usually it's reversed, where the neighbor invites the new person over...but you could flip it.
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If they won’t come your way or at least meet in the middle somewhere like at a cheap sandwich joint or coffee shop, then that really says a lot about the friendship
Since moving 4 months ago, my best friend...or so I thought,has not come to visit me, has bailed on the last 4 times she was supposed to meet up with me and really only calls when she has an issue. I haven't really heard from my other friends either (but not as close). It has really made me examine our friendship and now in retrospect, I see it was more one-sided.
My husband says she has always been that way and I am just seeing it. It just sucks to know you don't mean as much to some people as you thought. My husband also said that I'm a little depressed because I am not meeting people because I work from home. I had another job offer, but I really like my job and my boss,but I'm not sure its good for me.
I just really need some advice on how to let go and move forward. Transitions are not always easy.
It's only been four months. If it gets longer than I could see being concerned.
Don't give up the remote job due to wanting to make some friends. The office is often NOT the place to make any friends. Instead, as others have suggested, join groups, go to events, volunteer, etc. as a way to meet new people. Give off a positive energy and be willing to make the first move to invite others to get together.
I'm sure your husband's right in that she was ALWAYS like that. Often times, the person connected to the bad person is the last to see it because they're in denial &/or just don't see it.
Always remember: IF a person really wants to do something, they'll do it. If they don't, they won't. It's as simple as that.
For her being your "best friend", you'd think she would have visited you by now. 1.5 hrs isn't that far a drive in general IF you're used to seeing each other often. HOW often did you used to see her before moving? That makes a big difference...hopefully, you weren't the one always going to her.
OP I work from home and completely feel you. It is really hard to meet people. We moved to Texas a little over 5 years ago and finding new friends has been next to impossible. I joined a volunteer group and met a wonderful group of women who are now my close friends.
That said, working from home isn't for everyone. I would give it a bit more time to settle in. I found putting myself in a routine really helps. (frankly I need to get back into it). I would start my day, then around 10/11 go to a gym with the same class to get exercise and social time. Late afternoon I get out of the office for a short walk. Doing this on a daily basis, really helps.
It's easier to keep your friends for a lifetime if you don't put expectations on them. Everyone is busy with work and family and other commitments. The older you get, the busier you get, usually because your family is growing and there's even more things to do.
My ex decided he no longer wanted his old friends because they didn't visit us enough after we moved. My position was that WE moved, we should be the ones to make the extra effort to keep connected, not demand that others come see us. Decades later, after several moves, I have good friends all over the country, he has written off every single friend and family member and lives alone.
When we moved, I made the most friends through the kids' activities and volunteering at school. As I got older, it was through getting involved with our church and the neighborhood. I also worked from home.
You shouldn't feel bad about your friend not seeing you when she visits her boyfriend. It's very hard to fit in several visits over the same day or two and of course her boyfriend is most important. When we go to our hometown for a weekend, we rarely have time to see anyone outside of family. One of my very best friends lives two blocks from my sister in law. I've left family gatherings for 30 minutes to run down to her house for a quick visit.
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