Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
The biggest concern for me is (stupid I know) what is the interracial dating like in NC? What areas are good what areas aren't? I am a African American female and I exclusively date white men and Hispanic men (but mostly white).
When you think about interracial dating you don't necessarily think of the south as an area that's good for such things, but I'd say it's a little better than the Midwest in general. It's more diverse in the south than you'd typically think as well. If you stick to the more liberal/populated areas I think you'll find that it won't be a problem.
But having said that I think it's easier for the guys since so many of the local white guys around here won't entertain the possibility of long-term relationships with someone of another race/ethnicity. So for people like myself it means less competition. However, a number of local white girls seem to have no problem dating/marrying a black or Hispanic guy. So in that respect in W. NC you may find the Hispanic guys in shorter supply.
Realistically the largest factor when it comes to dating is going to be the size of the available dating pool. Then after that if you personally find the culture of whatever area you are in to be a good fit.
Then again you have odd things happening in the smaller areas around Asheville where people will both date out, but also be racist as hell.
I would advise against Charleston if you're looking for something long-term. There's a surplus of attractive single women in that city and as such the guys are known for playing the field.
Quote:
Originally Posted by RoaminRebel
It seems that if people catch flak for it, it's usually the opposite sex of their own race who are the most critical. In your case that would be the black males. At any rate, you may want to research further prior to moving - job availability being the biggest priority.
I am in my early 40's; born in NYC; lived in and around NYC most of my life.
Today, in 2016, there are areas within NYC (outer boroughs) where pockets of racism exist, in greater form than in Charlotte NC.
The folks whom I associate with, of varying ages and levels of education, would have no problem with an interracial couple.
I've found that much of the stereotypes associated with the South, are undeserved. For example, segregation is still practiced in much of the North, yet the South is desegregated. I've never left the United States, but have met native Southerners who've traveled around the world . I've lived alongside "educated" whites up North, have tolerated a lot of ignorance, yet have been blessed by the common sense that many (comparatively) uneducated Southerners possess.
Small towns in the South have bygone qualities that make them desirable. Large cities in the South are progressive, and benefit from wonderful parks and greenways. Conversely, the North clings not the successes of it's past, and many areas have failed to implement progressive policies that might benefit it's residents (e.g. park systems, nature trails, greenways, etc).
If you stick with larger metropolitan areas such as Charlotte, you might well find it more hospitable to interracial relationships than even some places up North.
No one really cares except in some of the extreme rural areas in NC. You'll find quite a bit of interracial couples in the metros like the Triangle, Triad, and Charlotte.
Even in most rural areas, no one cares. In fact, at least anecdotally, I've noticed that interracial couples seem as common, if not more so, in the working class rural areas of the state than some of the metro areas of NC others here are suggesting.
Broadly speaking, if there is subtle disapproval, it's more likely from older people who grew up in a different era when this wasn't as accepted as it is today, and they still cling to that mindset. But that isn't really unique to NC or the South.
Sorry if I am posting this in the wrong place. I am looking at potential job opportunities for after I finish grad school and I am from OH but looking to possibly move (likely move) to a southern state (NC, TN or KY) however, the biggest concern for me is (stupid I know) what is the interracial dating like in NC? What areas are good what areas aren't? I am a African American female and I exclusively date white men and Hispanic men (but mostly white). I know that I have heard that the South can be a little against that but I am really hoping that a move will be a good fresh start for me and will lead me to an amazing person to be with. I am looking at possible jobs near Jacksonville? For my situation is that a good place? Other areas that are better? Thank you
Before I give my two pennies, let me give you some of my background. I'm a black male in my mid 30s with a biracial child and a few white ex-girlfriends (this also includes an ex-wife who is white as well). However, I do not date white women exclusively. If a black female with a nice smile and a great personality comes along, she's got an equal chance with me.
My concern with your situation is that you exclusively date whites (Hispanics are whites too by the way). Most folks won't have a problem with your preference, but you are rare which makes it difficult for you to "fit in". For example, you won't fit in with white female friends who only date white guys. You won't fit in with black female friends who only date black men. Also, you won't fit in with those who don't care about race either (because you obviously do care about the race of your date).
So to answer your question, YES the south is full of folks with open minds. However, you're looking for a place that's open to a black female who ONLY sees herself happy with white men. I date outside of my race a lot, but I do not see white women as my only ticket to "happiness".
Just keep in mind that what you're looking for is the exact opposite of what MLK marched for. MLK marched against people being judged by the color of their skin. However, you seek happiness based on skin, but then you do not wish for society to judge your choice based on skin. We can sometimes fear from society the very same mentality that we contribute to society. Keep that in mind and welcome to the New South...
I live in Raleigh and have dated mostly African American women since moving here (I'm a white male). It's not uncommon from what I've noticed and for the most part, no one even bats an eye anymore.
Before I give my two pennies, let me give you some of my background. I'm a black male in my mid 30s with a biracial child and a few white ex-girlfriends (this also includes an ex-wife who is white as well). However, I do not date white women exclusively. If a black female with a nice smile and a great personality comes along, she's got an equal chance with me.
My concern with your situation is that you exclusively date whites (Hispanics are whites too by the way). Most folks won't have a problem with your preference, but you are rare which makes it difficult for you to "fit in". For example, you won't fit in with white female friends who only date white guys. You won't fit in with black female friends who only date black men. Also, you won't fit in with those who don't care about race either (because you obviously do care about the race of your date).
So to answer your question, YES the south is full of folks with open minds. However, you're looking for a place that's open to a black female who ONLY sees herself happy with white men. I date outside of my race a lot, but I do not see white women as my only ticket to "happiness".
Just keep in mind that what you're looking for is the exact opposite of what MLK marched for. MLK marched against people being judged by the color of their skin. However, you seek happiness based on skin, but then you do not wish for society to judge your choice based on skin. We can sometimes fear from society the very same mentality that we contribute to society. Keep that in mind and welcome to the New South...
"(Hispanics are whites too by the way)." Sorry my friend but that is one heck of a wrong statement!!!! Tell that to an Afrocuban! Tell that to an Afropuertorican! Tell that to a Afrodominican! and i can go on all day long all the way to the tip of South America and back, even through Mexico there are Afromexicans descendants of African slaves of that area. That is like saying Americans are whites too by the way.
And you are being angry at her or at least you come across like that as if, a Black woman were ton say, I only date Puerto Ricans, and i have met some, that you are going to come out swinging like you have done here. I have two daughters, and i can tell you, that my ex wife being White will not date a White guy. She is now with a very nice Black man, should i, being a Puerto Rican do what you did here?
Anyone, should feel comfortable in any society with whomever they want to be with. That was the real reason why MLK really marched for. You are isolating that March strictly to one level and it should not be. He (MLK) marched and sacrificed his life even when he knew that he would be killed. So everyone, including all colored people, from everywhere, so anyone, could be with whomever they wanted to be with, without being judge, because of the color of their skin. The tenets of racism is to separate people.
So, if you are Black and your experience is, that your personality best fits that of a White and or Puertorican women, why should you not be able to find true happiness by being smart about your choices, if that is the way you want to go about it. In a way you are being a racist too! And why is the reason why she couldn't fit anywhere and with whatever groups? That is a matter for those whom she approaches to deal with and whether she fits in. I doubt that anyone, worth their marbles are going to reject a nice educated couple just because they are interracial, of course unless they are racist and in that case this argument is mute.
Is a matter in fitting in, like in anything. You come across as if a Black American Woman should have no right to date exclusively White men and that if she did she is a misfit and a racist of sorts that is not going to fit anywhere?
Perhaps she is saying, i feel comfortable with this type of characteristics, this type of characters, prevalent in this type of races and she has found out that she can be happy with that. I do not see anything wrong with that. Happiness and love have no boundaries but the ones "we" "YOU" create.
And also MLK marched for freedom, so you could be racist, but without imposing that racism upon others.
And besides, you know nothing about her background, but that is a whole ball of wax in itself...
Sorry to differ but i almost dropped the dog! Come here poochy poochy....
Last edited by CaptRican; 02-14-2016 at 03:39 PM..
There is a reason why the census states "Non-Hispanic whites". Also, when most people say "I date whites and hispanics exclusively" that person is probably not interested in a South American (Spanish speaking) black person. I could be wrong, but the OP seems to be looking for a person with white features (whether they speak English or Spanish).
I'm not about to get into a foolish debate about race, language, religion, or any other silly social construct. The truth is that we all smell funny when we sweat, look goofy when we fall on ice, and get stiff when we die. I'm of the belief that beauty and attractiveness comes in MANY forms (which is why I generally disagree with anyone who can only appreciate beauty in 1 or 2 different races). Also, anyone who associates certain character traits with a certain demographic is a racist fool in my book. Thugs, Phds, fellons, nerds, dorks, dead beats, hood rats all come in different sizes, shapes, colors, and languages.
To answer the OP's question though; she won't have a problem dating white/Hispanic WHITES in NC (not so sure why a black would wonder about dating a Hispanic Black, think about that one). But hey, if you think the OP is interested in a Spanish speaking person that look like the Olmecs of Ancient Mexico (google them if you're unfamiliar) keep thinking that lol.
Last edited by urbancharlotte; 02-15-2016 at 07:26 AM..
So, if you are Black and your experience is, that your personality best fits that of a White and or Puertorican women, why should you not be able to find true happiness by being smart about your choices, if that is the way you want to go about it. In a way you are being a racist too! And why is the reason why she couldn't fit anywhere and with whatever groups? That is a matter for those whom she approaches to deal with and whether she fits in. I doubt that anyone, worth their marbles are going to reject a nice educated couple just because they are interracial, of course unless they are racist and in that case this argument is mute.
You probably meant to say that this "argument is MOOT" but I'll just pretend that you're educated enough to have known that. Also, how can someone's personality best fit with a particular ethnic group? Saying that my personality fits in better with Asians/Blacks/Whites/Indians etc just sounds dumb. Then again, this is why we have these pointless debates about race/culture/religion. This is probably why some folks think that they "don't belong" with certain groups of people.
For example, if you're black, educated, like rock/pop music, hate to dance, hates clubbing, don't smoke or drink and can't stand to go to church; it's tempting to think that you won't find happiness with a black partner. The reality is that there are MANY blacks out there just like yourself (and many non-blacks just like you too). In those cases, interracial dating makes sense. However, when someone takes it to the extreme and says "I won't date other people of my race" that's racism (like it or not). This also applies to the many different white females I've met who won't give a white dude a fair chance. Racism is racism, whether it's against other races or your own race.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
. I've lived alongside "educated" whites up North, have tolerated a lot of ignorance, yet have been blessed by the common sense that many (comparatively) uneducated Southerners possess.
Tell that to an Afrocuban! Tell that to an Afropuertorican! Tell that to a Afrodominican! and i can go on all day long all the way to the tip of South America and back, even through Mexico there are Afromexicans descendants of African slaves of that area. That is like saying Americans are whites too by the way. 
