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1 Ohio school, 4 bullied teens dead at own hand: Nation | adn.com (http://www.adn.com/2010/10/08/1491890/1-ohio-school-4-bullied-teens.html - broken link)
The parents and the school is going to have to step up to stop this. They don't just call a name and then stop; these monsters badger until the one being bullied can't take it any longer. These are not normal kids...treat them like the criminals they are!!
1 Ohio school, 4 bullied teens dead at own hand: Nation | adn.com (http://www.adn.com/2010/10/08/1491890/1-ohio-school-4-bullied-teens.html - broken link)
The parents and the school is going to have to step up to stop this. They don't just call a name and then stop; these monsters badger until the one being bullied can't take it any longer. These are not normal kids...treat them like the criminals they are!!
I put the blame 100% in the parents hands. Why do kids have unlimited private access to computers in their bedrooms? Why don't the parents have the computers out in the livingroom where they can control what they are doing? Why aren't the parents more attentive to what the kids are doing?
Oh I'm sorry, They want their "ME TIME", they want their personal time. They don't want to be bothered with what the kids are up to. But when the kids do get into trouble, they want to bame it on the schools. These kids when found to be conected to the loss of this child, should be Adjudicated with "Delinquency by Murder" under the ORC. And their parents should be all charged with "Complicity of the Same", because they didn't pay attention to what their kids were into. Now the parents of the child who died can file a law suite for "Wrongful Death".
I've known some fathers and mothers that took matters into their own hands because of what they saw what other students were doing to their kids. They asked "only once" that the punks parents put an end to problem. And if it didn't end, they went back to the parents of the bully and PUT AN END TO IT.
I put the blame 100% in the parents hands. Why do kids have unlimited private access to computers in their bedrooms? Why don't the parents have the computers out in the livingroom where they can control what they are doing? Why aren't the parents more attentive to what the kids are doing?
Oh I'm sorry, They want their "ME TIME", they want their personal time. They don't want to be bothered with what the kids are up to. But when the kids do get into trouble, they want to bame it on the schools. These kids when found to be conected to the loss of this child, should be Adjudicated with "Delinquency by Murder" under the ORC. And their parents should be all charged with "Complicity of the Same", because they didn't pay attention to what their kids were into. Now the parents of the child who died can file a law suite for "Wrongful Death".
I've known some fathers and mothers that took matters into their own hands because of what they saw what other students were doing to their kids. They asked "only once" that the punks parents put an end to problem. And if it didn't end, they went back to the parents of the bully and PUT AN END TO IT.
What? How the hell is computer use relevant at all?
And how can you blame the parents of the kids who did the bullying? Do you know for a fact that the school made the parents aware of what their son/daughter was doing? No. You don't.
It's not that their parents "don't want to be bothered with what the kids are up to." It's called giving their child a little thing called independence. Hoovering over their kids shoulder like a hawk gives the kid no independence. No room to mature. No room to grow as a person. This is high school, not third grade. Parents are supposed to give them a little room to breathe.
What? How the hell is computer use relevant at all?
And how can you blame the parents of the kids who did the bullying? Do you know for a fact that the school made the parents aware of what their son/daughter was doing? No. You don't.
It's not that their parents "don't want to be bothered with what the kids are up to." It's called giving their child a little thing called independence. Hoovering over their kids shoulder like a hawk gives the kid no independence. No room to mature. No room to grow as a person. This is high school, not third grade. Parents are supposed to give them a little room to breathe.
Did they not do the threats over the internet?
Were any of the parents attentive to what their children were up to?
Do any of the parents check with the school to see if the children are behaving themselves and doing the school assignments?
Do any of the parents stand with the school when the children get into trouble, or do the say "Not my little Bobby he's a good kid".
You can give a child a LITTLE Freedom, but you must stll control them with some restraint. You can give them room to breath, but you must always let them know who is and always will be in charge as long as they reside under your roof. The rooms they sleep in belong to the home owner, not the child. So there is no such thing as "this is my private room stay out". NO! I own the house and as long as you live here, "I go where I wish to". When you leave the HOUSE I OWN, you do as you please.
Even as high school students, they are still children living under their parents roof and rule and the parents ARE ultimity responsible for their actions. So they should suffer the same, if it is proven that they (the parents) are delinquent in their actions (as) parents (adults of culpable mental state).
What? How the hell is computer use relevant at all?
And how can you blame the parents of the kids who did the bullying? Do you know for a fact that the school made the parents aware of what their son/daughter was doing? No. You don't.
It's not that their parents "don't want to be bothered with what the kids are up to." It's called giving their child a little thing called independence. Hoovering over their kids shoulder like a hawk gives the kid no independence. No room to mature. No room to grow as a person. This is high school, not third grade. Parents are supposed to give them a little room to breathe.
Sorry to say, but until that child is a legal adult, the parental units are STILL responsible for the actions by the child. It is the parents' RESPONSIBILITY to keep the child inline, be aware of what the child is up to, and take appropriate action when necessary. "Room to breathe" ?? HA! My father told me if I wanted certain freedoms that he did not feel appropriate for my age, I was more than welcome move out. But, while I lived under HIS ROOF, I had to play by HIS RULES. End of discussion. Oh, wait.. there was no discussion!
My family situation is a great example of engaged parents versus not. My father was strict with my sister and I, but allowed us to join any educational / team oriented / growth activities that we wanted, but did not force us to do anything. We had choices. He also taught us consequences are both good and bad with every decision we make. If we wanted to do something above the normal that might cost extra, we have to do extra around the household to 'earn' the privilege. I was highly involved with 4H and music, my sister with karate, music and international groups. I did not go to college, she did. We both are skilled, have respectable occupations, are functioning members of society. My father's more recent wife felt she had to be her childrens' best friend in life, never laid down the law, was never engaged with their activities and did not monitor what they were getting into. Before her 2 sons were even 16, they both had criminal records that included grand theft auto. By their 20's, 1 son is now deceased to drug overdose, the other has been in the hospital at least 2 times for drug overdoes (the most recent they didn't think he'd come back). This son is currently trying to fight his case for disability and his highest occupational achievement was pizza delivery - that he could not continue due to suspended license and impounded vehicle (the impounded vehicle stopped him, not the suspended license). The younger daughter purposely got knocked up at 18 so she could 'live off the system' and is very violent towards people and property. None of these individuals are productive members of society or do respectable things to get by.
What does that mean? Parents need to be engaged in the activities of the children. If they are not, they are just as accountable as the child. Maybe more so.
4 kids in one school. that is a trend and intervention is warranted.
it breaks my heart that the family moved here for a better life, probably during Yugoslav the wars of the 90s and this is what came of it. i didn't read about the next three.
is there a geographic component to this or could it happen anywhere? i think people with accents are welcomed in my neighborhood, but maybe they are in Mentor too.
What I see here is a lack of responsibility on the schools part and the parents part. I`ll never understand why parents keep sending their kids who are in this situation to school. They are in total DENIAL!...I would have pulled my kid out of this school a long time ago. I don`t get it....
I put the blame 100% in the parents hands. Why do kids have unlimited private access to computers in their bedrooms? Why don't the parents have the computers out in the livingroom where they can control what they are doing? Why aren't the parents more attentive to what the kids are doing?
Oh I'm sorry, They want their "ME TIME", they want their personal time. They don't want to be bothered with what the kids are up to. But when the kids do get into trouble, they want to bame it on the schools. These kids when found to be conected to the loss of this child, should be Adjudicated with "Delinquency by Murder" under the ORC. And their parents should be all charged with "Complicity of the Same", because they didn't pay attention to what their kids were into. Now the parents of the child who died can file a law suite for "Wrongful Death".
I've known some fathers and mothers that took matters into their own hands because of what they saw what other students were doing to their kids. They asked "only once" that the punks parents put an end to problem. And if it didn't end, they went back to the parents of the bully and PUT AN END TO IT.
I agree with most of what you are saying. I'm not a legal scholar, so I can't even begin to tell others what exactly the law says in a situation like this. What I can say is that parents need to better monitor their kids. Now, having recently been one myself, and still surrounded by many (OSU is like that), I can say kids lie. They tend to lie a lot too, especially when it comes to school life. This is why schools, both admins and teachers, should be aware of what's going on in the class room and tell parents when something is going on, be it bullying or being bullied. Intervention at the earliest stages is the best way to stop this.
Now, I know a lot of parents would probably get ticked off at the fact that the teacher is telling them how to parent, but I know from my parents and grandparents that their teahcers' words were final, NO IF, AND, or BUTS! I was raised much the same way. A teacher should still do this, as well as get admins involved (because isn't that why we pay them so d@mn much?), partly because it brings responsible adults into the situation, but also covers the school's end of things. If a school doesn't respond to parents request (especially if they "lost/destroyed" records, which is rather fishy and possibly illegal, IMO), then something is wrong at the school.
To me, it looks like the school had its chance to do something and screwed up big time. While I still feel parents are the ones ultimately responsible, the school may have acted in negligence here.
So, the point is, ask your kid what they are doing in school, or whether they are being harrassed. I don't know if I agree with escalating the situation with the bully's parents beyond a talk, but if things continue, then go to the school, and if that doesn't work, the police. Even then, if things are going badly (and it better be badly cause this situation is costly on many fronts), file a lawsuit.
As far as situations outside of school, that is squarely in the parent's court, and if to a certain degree, law enforcement officials.
I agree with most of what you are saying. I'm not a legal scholar, so I can't even begin to tell others what exactly the law says in a situation like this. What I can say is that parents need to better monitor their kids. Now, having recently been one myself, and still surrounded by many (OSU is like that), I can say kids lie. They tend to lie a lot too, especially when it comes to school life. This is why schools, both admins and teachers, should be aware of what's going on in the class room and tell parents when something is going on, be it bullying or being bullied. Intervention at the earliest stages is the best way to stop this.
Now, I know a lot of parents would probably get ticked off at the fact that the teacher is telling them how to parent, but I know from my parents and grandparents that their teahcers' words were final, NO IF, AND, or BUTS! I was raised much the same way. A teacher should still do this, as well as get admins involved (because isn't that why we pay them so d@mn much?), partly because it brings responsible adults into the situation, but also covers the school's end of things. If a school doesn't respond to parents request (especially if they "lost/destroyed" records, which is rather fishy and possibly illegal, IMO), then something is wrong at the school.
To me, it looks like the school had its chance to do something and screwed up big time. While I still feel parents are the ones ultimately responsible, the school may have acted in negligence here.
So, the point is, ask your kid what they are doing in school, or whether they are being harrassed. I don't know if I agree with escalating the situation with the bully's parents beyond a talk, but if things continue, then go to the school, and if that doesn't work, the police. Even then, if things are going badly (and it better be badly cause this situation is costly on many fronts), file a lawsuit.
As far as situations outside of school, that is squarely in the parent's court, and if to a certain degree, law enforcement officials.
The biggest thing is that the parents NEED to get envolved. And when they need to confront the school, bullies parents and all envolved. Take notes or video tape of who, when, where and what was said as best as they can. This way when they need to take it to the courts, the courts, law enforcement and lawyers can investigate all aspects and deal with those at fault accordingly.
Bullies need to be expelled after 1 warning. Mentor High School is a damn disgrace. The parents & school personel who do nothing about the bullies need to have their asses beat down.
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