So you can't give your children things they want? (ideas, teenager, teaching)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
You can only give your children things you want them to have, and nothing they want? What is that about? Does that include everything, or just things you didn't want at that age and so it must be just total rubbish?
I'm not saying you should spoil your kids, but give me a break. What's wrong with exchanging the things they want for work around the house, inside, outside, washing the car, whatever?
I guess because you didn't want a phone when you were 11, kids now shouldn't want them either... because change is so bad and evil, and all change and difference means the end of the world... apparently.
I'm guessing you are a teenager. Maybe a young adult without kids yet. Parenting isn't about giving them whatever they want/whatever you can afford. It is about teaching them what they need to know to function in the real world as adults. Real world adults need to know how to prioritize their wants and needs. Giving in to everything they want teaches them absolutely nothing. There aren't enough hours in the week for my kid to work off an iphone. It has nothing to do with me not having an iphone when I was 11. It has to do with the fact that I function perfectly well NOW without one. So can any 11 year old on the planet.
And seriously, think about the amount of money parents spend on a TON of cheap toys for a 6 or 7 year old. Why can't $100 in Barbies, baby dolls, etc for Christmas be traded for a cheap used iPhone you picked up for $50-$100?
I'm just curious. That's why I asked... if it's secluded to things only she wants, or if it's everything.
I think it's about a balance and about what works for the family. If the family can afford it, then yes, the kids can have things that they want vs. only things that they need. It then becomes a matter of prioritizing wants. Adults do that too. I have friends whose children get one Christmas gift per year (last year, they each got a scooter), but the parents own every gadget and then some--not just the iphone, but also the special gloves to work the iphone. That's a mixed message, I think.
My girls are good girls who have never so much as gotten behavior warnings in their classrooms, and they listen and respect their parents. In fact, they don't even ask for much. Part of how we reward that is by buying them things they want for their birthdays and for Christmas.
It is in my strongest belief that you should not purchase an iphone. Why? because you are giving into her wants. It is not a necessity and she has a cell phone already. I think you should teach her the value of the dollar and let her work for an iphone if she so desperately wants one and pay for such an expensive gadget out of her own pocket, be it Christmas money, birthday money, chore money and what not.
With the economy in such bad shape and people still being unable to afford even basics, I would use this as a learning experience. I want to make myself clear I am not judging you as a parent but just look at the scenerio differently.
And if you decide to purchase said iphone regardless, please have her donate the old cellphone to charity.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeezy is BACK
To name one of many. It's crazy, I don't care how old you are.
I might add that age isn't always directly related to wisdom, and I resent your assertion that I must be an idiot because I'm young.
Here is the entire post you are quoting. You sure took her words out of context.
Nobody called you an idiot. What happens is that we were all young and thought we knew it all. Then we matured and learned we did not know anything specially about raising children.
Here is the entire post you are quoting. You sure took her words out of context.
Nobody called you an idiot. What happens is that we were all young and thought we knew it all. Then we matured and learned we did not know anything specially about raising children.
I didn't take it out of context at all. I also clearly asked what would be wrong with just GIVING it to your kid? Would posting all of it have changed my point? No. I cut it down to a specificity for the purpose of highlighting my point. That's even what the thread title indicates... simply giving it for nothing. The same people here judging me for my ideas are out there GIVING their children hundreds of dollars of other crap on a regular basis. And seriously, this isn't just concerning an iPhone. There are threads debating how little children should be given all the time around here, with the same people going off on rants about how terrible it is to just give your child something. I don't understand it.
And if you read closely, you'll see that I never said I was "called" an idiot, I said it was asserted. Like how you just asserted that I'm ignorant. So please don't try to change the subject or alter the debate. Don't bother if you have nothing useful to add. But please feel free to enlighten me with your infinite wisdom you've gained over the years that young people are oh-so-unprivy to.
^^ I agree about the hundreds of dollars of plastic crap. My youngest daughter had to have zhu zhu pets for her birthday, and several family members chipped in to buy her about $120 dollars worth. They have been played with exactly once, on her birthday, four months ago.
If the only thing that the child wants is a single pricier item, it's not worse to buy that item than bins full of zhus zhus or whatever. Do I wish I could have back the $20 I spent on bendaroos for Christmas? Yes I do. I get the point. Many parents are spending this kind of money anyway, but in smaller increments, so what makes an iphone off-limits?
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
