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My daughter is 15 and they recently did sex ed in her high school health class. Apparently the subject matter was fairly generic and biological, with very little info about contraception.
She also told me that a friend of hers (15) had started having sex with her BF but they were not using condoms, he was pulling out. They believe this is safe, as they have never heard otherwise! We do live in a rural area where most are very conservative and never attended college or traveled. Teen pregnancy is common here.
Now when I did sex ed way way back in the 1970s, we most defininitely were taught all the myths about contraception, and the effectiveness of every method, including pulling out. When I told my daughter this, she looked disgusted and said that sex ed has really changed because of all the conservative parents sticking their noses in.
I find this really hard to believe. Could it be true that in a society where sex is discussed much more openly in popular culture, kids are learning even less about it in school?
Perhaps there was an earlier, more informative class taught in the middle school years--she attended 7th and 8th grade in European schools when we were living overseas. But still, I am shocked to read posts on the Relationships board from people who don't seem to know the basics about preventing pregnancy.
I was in High School in the 1990s so I'm not sure what the changes have been since then, but our sex education was nothing short of atrocious.
In the 7th Grade, the girls in my class and I had a brief lecture from our teacher one lunch hour about how to use Sanitary Pads and about the fact that we were probably going to get our period soon- if we hadn't already started. No explanation of what a period was, just told it was going to happen and shown a Pad.
In the 10th Grade (too late as far as a lot of the girls were concerned, I would estimate that at least a third of the girls in my class were sexually active by then) we had a single class- with one of the Nuns (I went to a Presbyterian school and a few of our teachers were elderly nuns) which in retrospect and even at the time was highly amusing. I remember her telling us that we could get pregnant from a toilet seat if a man had 'planted his seed' on it up to 3 days before we used it. Abstinence of course was the main goal of the class, but she did briefly touch on the topic of Condoms.
Needless to say, in that class I learned nothing, either.
And that was my sex education in the 90s in the private Australian school system! I hope like mad that it's improved!
EDIT: I learned most from teen magazines (regarding STDs, contraception, etc) but carried a lot of misconceptions through to adulthood. I got a very brief talk from my mother about how babies are made when I was about 7 or 8 years old- but never recall any contraception discussion, STD discussion, with her. Sex was something that wasn't talked about in my household. I'm definitely thankful for the bits and pieces I picked up from magazines, because if it had been up to my mother and the school system I would have known close to nothing!
In my personal experience, we received sex education in 4th grade, 5th grade, 7th grade, 8th grade, and 10th grade. In 10th grade we received an extensive treatment of contraception, as well as make Powerpoints where we had to lift pictures of STD-infected genitals off the internet and show them to all the class. One interesting thing about that class (which was mandatory) was that they used materials from Focus on the Family and Planned Parenthood in the same class. Abortion was not really discussed, nor were sexual techniques, although masturbation and sexual fantasies were both mentioned with approbation, which of course went entirely against my morals. One of the true-and-false questions on our tests even was "Sexual fantasies are immoral", which I answered with, according to my belief system, a True. Of course, the "right" answer to that question according to my teacher (a meticulous jock who checked notebooks randomly) was a "False".
The truth is that the "sex education curriculum" in public education is largely driven by pressures created by a few people who hold ultra conservative views on issues such as birth control, and abortion.
In my experience, there are too many school administrators who are "milk toasts" and won't stand up for what they know is right. Many try to "make everyone happy" when that's simply an impossibility. Sometimes what is taught in school is controversial. Its just the way that life is. For example, evolution is a scientific doctrine, and its been proven for anyone with an open mind. Yet, among some religions, it is "controversial". I compare it to a few people who won't accept that the Earth is round, or that the Earth rotates around the Sun. Some people because of personal or religious dogma won't believe what scientists have established as fact.
The result is that a good curriculum that provides information that helps young people avoid out-of-wedlock pregnancy and avoid unsafe sexual practices is replaced by preaching about "abstinence". If only young people would abstain from having sex, I suppose we could go back to living like people did in a t.v. show like "Leave it to Beaver". Young people don't abstain from sex though and teenagers can't be chained up or watched constantly, so the only real alternative is to educate them how to protect themselves.
People who oppose solid education about sex and reproduction for young people constantly show up at school board meetings and complain. They go the principal and complain. They write letters to the editor. I find most of their views absurd. They seem to live in a world that believes if you talk about the human body and reproduction that this somehow will encourage young people to go out and have sex outside of marriage. Their idea is that its better to keep young people ignorant about the way their own bodies function. There's nothing new about this. It was the genesis of laws decades ago that prevented contraceptives from being prescribed for even married women. It took a US Supreme Court decision to end that sort of nonsense.
These people are clearly a minority. Yet, they often get what they want when it comes to a school curriculum, simply because they are loud, noisy, and obnoxious. Normal people don't go to school board meetings and don't write letters-to-the-editor over this sort of thing, so our views are generally neglected. I've gotten to the point where I wish they would just take their kids out of the public school system and either home school them, or privately educate them. Than, without their constant complaining, we might be able to create a school curriculum that is actually meaningful for young people.
Last edited by markg91359; 01-26-2013 at 09:20 AM..
The truth is that the "sex education curriculum" in public education is largely driven by pressures created by a few people who hold ultra conservative views on issues such as birth control, and abortion.
In my experience, there are too many school administrators who are "milk toasts" and won't stand up for what they know is right. Many try to "make everyone happy" when that's simply an impossibility. Sometimes what is taught in school is controversial. Its just the way that life is. For example, evolution is a scientific doctrine, and its been proven for anyone with an open mind. Yet, among some religions, it is "controversial". I compare it to a few people who won't accept that the Earth is round, or that the Earth rotates around the Sun. Some people because of personal or religious dogma won't believe what scientists have established as fact.
These people constantly show up at school board meetings and complain. They go the principal and complain. They write letters to the editor. I find most of their views absurd. They seem to live in a world that believes if you talk about the human body and reproduction that this somehow will encourage young people to go out and have sex outside of marriage. Their idea is that its better to keep young people ignorant about the way their own bodies function. There's nothing new about this. It was the genesis of laws decades ago that prevented contraceptives from being prescribed for even married women. It took a US Supreme Court decision to end that sort of nonsense.
These people are clearly a minority. Yet, they often get what they want when it comes to a school curriculum, simply because they are loud, noisy, and obnoxious. Normal people don't go to school board meetings and don't write letters-to-the-editor over this sort of thing, so our views are generally neglected. I've gotten to the point where I wish they would just take their kids out of the public school system and either home school them, or privately educate them. Than, without their constant complaining, we might be able to create a school curriculum that is actually meaningful for young people.
"Meaningful for young people"? You mean covering such things as anal sex, pleasure techniques, and abortion in a totally approving way?
Unfortunately, if it isn't, too many young people would be put at risk for pregnancies and STDs. I would rather my kids have all the facts than thinking they know it all based on playground rumors.
Besides some parents being uncomfortable discussing sex with their children, the discomfort can go both ways, with kids also being embarrassed to ask mom and dad. A single parent may not be in a position to understand what an opposite sex child is going through. Far more good than harm comes out of sex education, as long as it isn't limited by conservative viewpoints, but is presented with all scenarios.
The truth is that the "sex education curriculum" in public education is largely driven by pressures created by a few people who hold ultra conservative views on issues such as birth control, and abortion.
In my experience, there are too many school administrators who are "milk toasts" and won't stand up for what they know is right. Many try to "make everyone happy" when that's simply an impossibility. Sometimes what is taught in school is controversial. Its just the way that life is. For example, evolution is a scientific doctrine, and its been proven for anyone with an open mind. Yet, among some religions, it is "controversial". I compare it to a few people who won't accept that the Earth is round, or that the Earth rotates around the Sun. Some people because of personal or religious dogma won't believe what scientists have established as fact.
These people constantly show up at school board meetings and complain. They go the principal and complain. They write letters to the editor. I find most of their views absurd. They seem to live in a world that believes if you talk about the human body and reproduction that this somehow will encourage young people to go out and have sex outside of marriage. Their idea is that its better to keep young people ignorant about the way their own bodies function. There's nothing new about this. It was the genesis of laws decades ago that prevented contraceptives from being prescribed for even married women. It took a US Supreme Court decision to end that sort of nonsense.
These people are clearly a minority. Yet, they often get what they want when it comes to a school curriculum, simply because they are loud, noisy, and obnoxious. Normal people don't go to school board meetings and don't write letters-to-the-editor over this sort of thing, so our views are generally neglected. I've gotten to the point where I wish they would just take their kids out of the public school system and either home school them, or privately educate them. Than, without their constant complaining, we might be able to create a school curriculum that is actually meaningful for young people.
"Meaningful for young people"? You mean covering such things as anal sex, pleasure techniques, and abortion in a totally approving way?
Ah, the old slippery slope argument.
Kids should be taught enough facts to avoid pregnancy and STDs, prevent sexual abuse, and understand the medical and surgical realities surrounding legal abortion.
The fact remains that where kids are taught openly about sexuality in the curriculum, teenage pregnancy and abortion rates are lower.
I'm always amazed that people think so narrowly when the topic of sex education comes up. It's always about affecting the short-term behavior of teens. There never seems to be much discussion of the need for knowledge that won't be needed until much later in life. It's strange how it's understood that most school subjects won't be needed until much later in their careers, but sex education is almost always intended to be used immediately. In my mind, that is what abstinence-only programs target--premarital sex.
We haven't generally tried true comprehensive sex education. In fact, the subject would be better named Reproductive Health Education. The goal of sex education should focus on the ostensible goal of teaching about the anatomy and physiology of the human reproductive system and its care throughout one's lifetime. This should include all stages of development, including menopause, malfunctions of the systems, cancers and other diseases of the reproductive system. A consequence of abstinence-only sex education is that schools are failing to educate about the range of reproductive health issues.
Even abstinent teens are likely to marry and have marital relations eventually. As adults, they will need to understand normal and abnormal reproductive system functions, including, but not limited to cancers of the reproductive organs--breast, cervical, ovarian, testicular, penile, and prostate, to name the most critical. Abstinent teens need to know how to do self-exams of the breast and testicles and the importance of regular medical check-ups for each stage of life.
Our girls need to learn at some point that there are genetic mutations that may influence them to have a prophylactic mastectomy. They need to be informed about endometriosis and fibroid tumors, ovarian cysts and cervical polyps. Boys need to be aware of how lifestyle choices will affect their prostate health. Both need to made aware of how infertility can impact people's lives.
Parents should provide this information, but unfortunately, most do not. That leaves school and peers as the primary sources of information. No one believes that a child's schooling is primarily for their immediate use. They are preparing to use their education in their adult lives. It may take decades before they ever have to use the knowledge they acquired in school, and no one has a problem with that. Why should reproductive education be different?
Even abstinence-only proponents should be able to agree that understanding one's own body and its functions is a critical part of a basic education. Abstinence education does not need to preclude the dissemination of information regarding infertility, endometriosis, cancer, and other common reproductive health problems. It has nothing to do with one's political orientation.
My daughter is 15 and they recently did sex ed in her high school health class. Apparently the subject matter was fairly generic and biological, with very little info about contraception.
She also told me that a friend of hers (15) had started having sex with her BF but they were not using condoms, he was pulling out. They believe this is safe, as they have never heard otherwise! We do live in a rural area where most are very conservative and never attended college or traveled. Teen pregnancy is common here.
Now when I did sex ed way way back in the 1970s, we most defininitely were taught all the myths about contraception, and the effectiveness of every method, including pulling out. When I told my daughter this, she looked disgusted and said that sex ed has really changed because of all the conservative parents sticking their noses in.
I find this really hard to believe. Could it be true that in a society where sex is discussed much more openly in popular culture, kids are learning even less about it in school?
Perhaps there was an earlier, more informative class taught in the middle school years--she attended 7th and 8th grade in European schools when we were living overseas. But still, I am shocked to read posts on the Relationships board from people who don't seem to know the basics about preventing pregnancy.
Thoughts?
How unfortunate that none of your daughter's friends have parents, since sex education is not the school's responsibility, you should not be surprised that they aren't doing a very good job of it.
How terribly tragic that 15 year old children are forced to make these kinds of decisions. What kind of parents raise a child to behave this way? My God, I would have been beaten with a tire iron if I ever even *thought* about having sex before I turned 18. What an incredibly sad situation for your daughter. My suggestion is to find her a better class of friends.
20yrsinBranson
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