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Almost a year ago, I was out to eat with a few friends. Seated next to us was a small family of 3. A mother, grandmother and a little boy.
The Mother and grandmother were talking and the boy was just sitting quietly. When the two adults were finished talking, the boy proceeded to say something like "I really enjoyed the ride over here, I never saw that"
The boy never really even finished his statement when his grandmother cut right across him and proceeded to talk about another subject. The boy said "Grandmom I was speaking" and the mother then said "It doesn't matter, she's an adult and your a child, you wait."
The Mother looked about 35, Grandmother, late 50s, child between 8 and 11?
Do you believe in "Seen and not Heard"
Should Parents/adults respect children.
Last edited by Jaded; 07-26-2013 at 01:15 PM..
Reason: Please don't discuss moderator actions.
In general, I think this is poor parenting on the mother's part. Can't really blame the grandmother as she may have hearing issues or something. It's also somewhat dependent on the grandmom/mother dynamic so hard to know 100%.
Stuff like that a kid can carry for a long time. Anyhow, providing all was on the up and up, I think his mother was rude and disrespectful and I feel bad for the kid.
My family is a perfect example. As my brother and I got older, our parents were less strict on the rules. We basically started ruling the household. They lost control over us and we did whatever we wanted. If we wanted to buy something, we'd go straight to their wallets without even asking. It's their fault for not standing their ground (I couldn't think of any other way to rephrase this. No TM/GZ reference intended).
My family is a perfect example. As my brother and I got older, our parents were less strict on the rules. We basically started ruling the household. They lost control over us and we did whatever we wanted. If we wanted to buy something, we'd go straight to their wallets without even asking. It's their fault for not standing their ground (I couldn't think of any other way to rephrase this. No TM/GZ reference intended).
No matter what you say to your kids when you're raising them, the example you set will always be more powerful.
Want to be a better parent? Be a better person.
That means showing them courtesies and respect on a day-to-day basis that you expect to be shown in return, while still knowing when it is time to "get all parental on them" as I put it to my 11 and 14 year old. If they are about to make some lame excuse for something, I will interrupt. That's me being The Mom. But what you describe...it's rudeness and it's setting a poor example in my opinion.
My family is a perfect example. As my brother and I got older, our parents were less strict on the rules. We basically started ruling the household. They lost control over us and we did whatever we wanted. If we wanted to buy something, we'd go straight to their wallets without even asking. It's their fault for not standing their ground (I couldn't think of any other way to rephrase this. No TM/GZ reference intended).
We always treated our Sons as adults and carried on conversations with them as such. They were taught manners, but if they had something to say we listened and let them talk. If a child was butting in when some adult was talking that would be a different matter, you would say "Wait until "Bill" is finished so you can have your turn." But I certainly would not demean a child and make them feel like a sub par human being.
But everyone teaches their children differently, I guess.
Don
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