Great advice or gift for a "kid' leaving home for the first time (allowance, smart)
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Those of us who are experienced parents( we have 7 all together) know that parenting and teaching goes on every single minute and not one discussion or program makes up the majority of our teaching. We realize we have to use lots of creative ways to get our points across and good parents know when they are not being listened to. Somehow kids tune us out like the invisible droning teacher in the Charlie Brown programs. That is how we sometimes sound to our kids.
There was a thread here not too long ago discussing why two accomplished pianists would hire a piano teacher for their kid. makes perfect sense to me. Outside influences and resources bring variety and different approaches to a problem. My next door neighbors are a world renowned writer and a Ph.D. scientist who are both native Russians. Twice a week a woman comes in to teach their kids Russian. No explanation needed.
Our kids take piano lessons from a woman who hired another pianist to teach her son who pouted and fumed every time his mother tried to teach him. He is now extremely proficient and confident but does not want any criticism from his mother. I would never eschew another source of education for my kids if I thought it would help and especially if I was not being heard or followed.. I would not think ill of any parent who called in somebody else to offer expertise or a different approach.
It's almost too late in this case. "Getting ready to leave" should have started about 4 or 5 years ago if not longer.
Does he know how to budget and cook? Does he know how to do his own laundry? (do NOT wash a red towel with your whites, just to "save doing another load"). Has he ever cleaned a bathroom?
He should have been going to the grocery store YEARS ago, buying your family's dinner, then cooking it and cleaning it up.
He should have been doing (at least his own) laundry YEARS ago.
I could go on, but you get the picture. "Just as he's about to leave" is WAY too late.
I'm a guy, and I can see that all that is being sent out is another "boy" looking for another "mother" to take care of him.
If he doesn't know how to budget, shop, cook, or clean, he stands a good chance of "not succeeding", which is not the same as "failing".
Start on those things NOW so at least he's aware of them, and let him know that he can and should call you when questions about those things come up.
Oh, and let me add one final thought: "The older I got/get, the smarter my parents became".
yes indeedy. I chained them to their own living room chairs, gaged them so they couldn't protest and forced the whole group to watch the TIVO at gun point. It's a wonder they didn't call the cops on me. It was during a conversation with my friend that I mentioned the everyday lessons in life which are covered by Judge Judy and she lamented she worked and had never seen it. She was delighted when I volunteered to TIVO it for her and her son. Both sets of parents knew about the tape and were curious since they had heard of Judge Judy but never had seen it.
The boys came by shortly thereafter to personally thank me. Now the mother has asked me to drive with them to where the boys will be moving. Guess they really hate me now!
I am floored by the assumptions that this tape was an indictment of their poor parenting and suggestion that the kids would end up in court!. And appreciative of the people who see it for what it is..an act of friendship for my friend and her family.
I guess you missed the part where the parents, and recipients, liked it? Or that a regular gift was also given? Good grief, some people really need to get over themselves. There is nothing wrong with NK's creative offering, as she obviously knows her audience.
P.S. My husband HATES Judge Judy and Nancy Grace. I'm always telling him I will have pictures of both of them, plus Nancy's twins in the casket with him!
Isn't amazing how some people see things that aren't even there? I bet they hear voices, too.
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