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Old 07-26-2014, 04:36 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,499 posts, read 54,084,735 times
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have you talked to your ex about how damaging it is for kids to spend so much time in front of a screen? Surely she wants what is best for them. Maybe she is so overwhelmed with being a single mother she is too tired to enforce rules or maybe she is unaware of the dangers.

These are very young kids and bad habits are hard to break the longer they are allowed. Once school starts you will see they need to be doing homework or letting off steam outside.
i have one daughter who is extremely allergic to bug bites. She swells up and is miserable so I'm torn between spraying her down with chemicals and making her play outside or letting her have alternatives to screen time inside. I think we have a good balance but during the hot days of summer about the only fun things to do outside is go to the community pool. We do make them walk our two dogs at least 3 times a day just to get them outside. Sometimes they see a friend and come back in wanting to stay out with a friend. But if nobody is there and we send them outside I find them sitting on the driveway playing with sidewalk chalk. Well...at least they are outside.

When we don't insist they go outside there are lots of alternatives including legos, puzzles, arts and crafts, piano practice. reading, writing. To get them ready for school which starts soon we are having our 12 year olds write two paragraphs before bedtime which can either be a story, what they did today, questions about something they might want to look up, questions about what they are reading...actually anything to get them back in the groove.

With your younger kids you could get them colored pencils and have them draw pictures telling you about their day or telling a story.
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Old 07-26-2014, 04:58 PM
 
32,516 posts, read 37,177,253 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Googx79 View Post
I completely understand what you're saying. However I was thinking more along the lines of making them want to get away from the TV.
That's easy. Don't let them watch anything but Lawrence Welk re-runs. (Check your PBS channel and fill up your DVR.)

Kids watch TV because it's full of stuff that appeals to them. If you're upset because your kids are glued to the tube...then control what's on the tube.

Personally, I don't think a couple of hours of junky TV on Saturday morning is going to rot the brains of American children and make them unable to compete in a global economy. As a kid I watched plenty of junky TV. But when I was seven and my parents turned on Lawrence Welk I fled the room.

I think they did that on purpose.
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Old 07-26-2014, 05:43 PM
 
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You have limited control over your ex. That said, all the setting rules stuff is OK I guess but it's much better to set an example. If during the time they spend with you you are working in the yard or garden, going fishing, lighting up the firepit and sleeping on the porch or in a tent in the yard, doing a jigsaw puzzle, renting a special movie so that the entertainment is planned & shared, playing a [] console type video game together, taking local trips whether to an eat-in pizza or ice cream place or some museum or trail in the woods [someplace where you have to actually talk to each other]. If you're not blogging, or watching tv, then they will learn by your example and even reluctant participation - - the effects could trickle into their lives at home.

Have them pick a year - use all that tech to research how people lived in that year during the week, and then spend the next weekend trying to do it. Technology doesn't all stink - teach your kids to use it as a tool to make living more that 2 feet from a screen more fun. Give them research on life, then live it. What's the best way to build a campfire? log cabin or teepee? What outdoor games did kids play in 1910? Can you really fry an egg on the sidewalk?
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Old 07-26-2014, 11:31 PM
 
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Kids usually watch TV a lot when parents are not very active. If you signed them up for a soccer team or whatever team and took them to play while you watched, they would have better things to do then watch TV. You have to take them out and do activities with them.
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Old 07-27-2014, 12:23 AM
 
49 posts, read 174,642 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 2.Milk View Post
Kids usually watch TV a lot when parents are not very active. If you signed them up for a soccer team or whatever team and took them to play while you watched, they would have better things to do then watch TV. You have to take them out and do activities with them.
This is the right answer.

Basically two out of the three need to be true:

1. Be a role model by steering away from these devices yourself.
2. You readily fund activities they would enjoy and are also good for them.
3. You consistently reward achievement in such activities - e.g., with money, opportunities, privileges, etc.
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Old 07-27-2014, 09:02 AM
 
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Have "no TV" time. Shut off the internet during those times, too. Heck, make it "no electronics" time. Boredom is a great teacher, they will quickly learn to find something else to do.
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Old 07-27-2014, 09:37 AM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,499 posts, read 54,084,735 times
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we call it no screen time at our house. they know what that covers.
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Old 07-27-2014, 11:56 AM
 
Location: U.S.A., Earth
5,511 posts, read 4,476,539 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by skelaki View Post
Sometimes you just have to be a parent and set and enforce rules even if the kids gripe and complain.

But also, you could use the no TV, computers, etc. time to o things with the kids. things such as playing board games (remember Uncle Wiggly or candyland, or chutes and Ladders?); or playing ball; or just spending time hunting bugs in the yard or taking a nature walk around the neighborhood. Or even reading a book to them.
If you're going the board game route, consider modern day board games, like Ticket To Ride, Settlers Of Catan, Dominion, etc. They go and other Eurogames like it go for $40 to $70 apiece, but it sure beats the drudgery of Monopoly, Risk, etc.
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Old 07-27-2014, 09:06 PM
 
Location: Long Island
9,531 posts, read 15,884,676 times
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my kids know 2 hrs of gaming on weekend dayss only and we put this rule in place when they started playing games around 3. I'm surprised they adhere to it now even at 6 but they do. It's all they know. TV time is considered the same thing. When they watched educational kids shows we were fine with it, but now there are fewer available this age.
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Old 07-27-2014, 10:13 PM
 
Location: NC
502 posts, read 896,379 times
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If the electronics are turned off (and I completely think they should be), then they have to have something else to do. They need interesting toys (legos, blocks, barbies, coloring books, stuffed animals, play dough) and games that they can play. Outside, balls are great - or get something like croquet so they can play together. And, frankly, there's nothing wrong with some sticks, some dirt and some water. Add some sand toys and you have mud pies shaped like fish and crabs. And don't forget books. Books are awesome and can be purchased super cheap at thrift stores.

The truth is kids love to play. They love to use their imaginations and invent and explore. My 7 year old twins have literally spent 8 hours in their play room simply playing. Not an electronic in sight. Now, do they love tv - sure. And there are days we watch it. But I find their behavior is worse when they do.

Your kids will get used to not watching tv. And, being bored won't kill them. If they can't find something to do, they can sit and stare at the walls. Or, you can give them chores. I bet they get busy playing quickly then:-)
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