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I don't want someone tracking MY every move, I am going to respect my child's right to that as well. At some point you have to cut the cord and just pray you raised them right and that they make good choices.
We use the "Find My Phone" feature all the time on the family phones. I have never thought of it as tracking or stalking at all. There are a multitude of reasons why we use this feature instead of calling or texting the person, none of which have to do with lack of trust, but usually to do with knowing the party cannot likely use their phone at that moment.
I dunno . . . I never felt the need to know where my husband and my kids were every second of every day. My husband and I use Waze to let each other know when we'll be home (we both work odd hours), but that's about it. Honestly, my peace of mind does not depend on knowing exactly and precisely where my family is at any given second. They earned trust by showing increasing responsibility. In our state, the curfew for under 18s was midnight (they couldn't drive after midnight unless they were driving from work to home) So that made it simple -- home by midnight. School nights were home by 9. After they were 18 and off to college, I only required a phone call or text before midnight to let me know what their plans were for the rest of the evening. Even now, as young adults, I ask for a text or phone call -- not as a control, but as a courtesy: If they aren't in their beds when I get up at 7 am, I just want to know if I need to call the police. :-)
I sorta laugh when I hear about the tracking stuff people come up with -- I always remember my daughter's roommate one summer in college. Her parents demanded that she be in her dorm room (from 100 miles away - they were idiots) by midnight, and tracked her GPS. Wait -- no, they tracked the PHONE'S GPS -- the phone was always in the dorm room before midnight -- sometimes all night after 9 or 10. SHE, on the other hand, was out having a wonderful time, with cheap little phone tucked in her pocket for emergencies.
I dunno . . . I never felt the need to know where my husband and my kids were every second of every day. My husband and I use Waze to let each other know when we'll be home (we both work odd hours), but that's about it. Honestly, my peace of mind does not depend on knowing exactly and precisely where my family is at any given second. They earned trust by showing increasing responsibility. In our state, the curfew for under 18s was midnight (they couldn't drive after midnight unless they were driving from work to home) So that made it simple -- home by midnight. School nights were home by 9. After they were 18 and off to college, I only required a phone call or text before midnight to let me know what their plans were for the rest of the evening. Even now, as young adults, I ask for a text or phone call -- not as a control, but as a courtesy: If they aren't in their beds when I get up at 7 am, I just want to know if I need to call the police. :-)
I sorta laugh when I hear about the tracking stuff people come up with -- I always remember my daughter's roommate one summer in college. Her parents demanded that she be in her dorm room (from 100 miles away - they were idiots) by midnight, and tracked her GPS. Wait -- no, they tracked the PHONE'S GPS -- the phone was always in the dorm room before midnight -- sometimes all night after 9 or 10. SHE, on the other hand, was out having a wonderful time, with cheap little phone tucked in her pocket for emergencies.
I dunno . . . I never felt the need to know where my husband and my kids were every second of every day. My husband and I use Waze to let each other know when we'll be home (we both work odd hours), but that's about it. Honestly, my peace of mind does not depend on knowing exactly and precisely where my family is at any given second. They earned trust by showing increasing responsibility. In our state, the curfew for under 18s was midnight (they couldn't drive after midnight unless they were driving from work to home) So that made it simple -- home by midnight. School nights were home by 9. After they were 18 and off to college, I only required a phone call or text before midnight to let me know what their plans were for the rest of the evening. Even now, as young adults, I ask for a text or phone call -- not as a control, but as a courtesy: If they aren't in their beds when I get up at 7 am, I just want to know if I need to call the police. :-)
I sorta laugh when I hear about the tracking stuff people come up with -- I always remember my daughter's roommate one summer in college. Her parents demanded that she be in her dorm room (from 100 miles away - they were idiots) by midnight, and tracked her GPS. Wait -- no, they tracked the PHONE'S GPS -- the phone was always in the dorm room before midnight -- sometimes all night after 9 or 10. SHE, on the other hand, was out having a wonderful time, with cheap little phone tucked in her pocket for emergencies.
Clearly this is excessive. I doubt many people would go to this extreme. I know I wouldn't
I dunno . . . I never felt the need to know where my husband and my kids were every second of every day. My husband and I use Waze to let each other know when we'll be home (we both work odd hours), but that's about it. Honestly, my peace of mind does not depend on knowing exactly and precisely where my family is at any given second. They earned trust by showing increasing responsibility. In our state, the curfew for under 18s was midnight (they couldn't drive after midnight unless they were driving from work to home) So that made it simple -- home by midnight. School nights were home by 9. After they were 18 and off to college, I only required a phone call or text before midnight to let me know what their plans were for the rest of the evening. Even now, as young adults, I ask for a text or phone call -- not as a control, but as a courtesy: If they aren't in their beds when I get up at 7 am, I just want to know if I need to call the police. :-)
I sorta laugh when I hear about the tracking stuff people come up with -- I always remember my daughter's roommate one summer in college. Her parents demanded that she be in her dorm room (from 100 miles away - they were idiots) by midnight, and tracked her GPS. Wait -- no, they tracked the PHONE'S GPS -- the phone was always in the dorm room before midnight -- sometimes all night after 9 or 10. SHE, on the other hand, was out having a wonderful time, with cheap little phone tucked in her pocket for emergencies.
We keep hearing this over and over again. That is not how the vast majority of people use these apps, including teens who use these apps themselves, and parents.
It is just another alternative to the hey, where are you?" text. Are you really claiming you never texted/called your teens to find out where they are? We are a busy family but we still check in. If they went out before I got home, I would call/text them to ask where they were and what their plans were.
I dunno . . . I never felt the need to know where my husband and my kids were every second of every day. My husband and I use Waze to let each other know when we'll be home (we both work odd hours), but that's about it. Honestly, my peace of mind does not depend on knowing exactly and precisely where my family is at any given second. They earned trust by showing increasing responsibility. In our state, the curfew for under 18s was midnight (they couldn't drive after midnight unless they were driving from work to home) So that made it simple -- home by midnight. School nights were home by 9. After they were 18 and off to college, I only required a phone call or text before midnight to let me know what their plans were for the rest of the evening. Even now, as young adults, I ask for a text or phone call -- not as a control, but as a courtesy: If they aren't in their beds when I get up at 7 am, I just want to know if I need to call the police. :-)
I sorta laugh when I hear about the tracking stuff people come up with -- I always remember my daughter's roommate one summer in college. Her parents demanded that she be in her dorm room (from 100 miles away - they were idiots) by midnight, and tracked her GPS. Wait -- no, they tracked the PHONE'S GPS -- the phone was always in the dorm room before midnight -- sometimes all night after 9 or 10. SHE, on the other hand, was out having a wonderful time, with cheap little phone tucked in her pocket for emergencies.
How is the bolded less intrusive than the app? I never heard of a parent requiring their college students to check in regarding their evening plans each night (although I don't doubt some do). If a kid is mature enough to go away to college, then parents need to accept that the oversight period has ended.
I completely understand that the worrying doesn't end just because our children reach 18. In fact, when they reached 21 I worried even more. Asking an adult child who lives at home to let you know if he/she is coming home at night is reasonable. Asking them to provide an itinerary each night at college is not. I don't think a tracking device at that age is either, unless both parties agree to it. And, I'm sure the parents of several college students who end up missing each year wish they had it.
How is the bolded less intrusive than the app? I never heard of a parent requiring their college students to check in regarding their evening plans each night (although I don't doubt some do). If a kid is mature enough to go away to college, then parents need to accept that the oversight period has ended.
I completely understand that the worrying doesn't end just because our children reach 18. In fact, when they reached 21 I worried even more. Asking an adult child who lives at home to let you know if he/she is coming home at night is reasonable. Asking them to provide an itinerary each night at college is not. I don't think a tracking device at that age is either, unless both parties agree to it. And, I'm sure the parents of several college students who end up missing each year wish they had it.
This. I didn't even know it was an option to make your child check in with you once they were off to college.
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