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maybe she remembers more than you think, and was "attached" to you because mama abandoned her.
I realize "abandoned" isn't what really happened, but in her view it might be.
I would talk to her about mama, and tell her the good news that mama's coming back and daughter can live with her again. Stress the happiness and joy of reunion, and promise that you'll spend time with her when you can.
Thank you for the welcome and the great replies. We are not official foster parents but I attended a resource family orientation right before we got her so we could start the official process, and we hope to commence once she is back with mom.
Since we are her aunt and uncle, and we are teaching her spanish, she calls us "tio" and "tia" and she knows very well who her mom is. Until mom boarded a ship in June, they facetimed 2x times daily, and now just once a month, but she kisses her pictures on FB and IG and she has a build-a bear with mom's voice recorded. Mom sends gifts monthly from each country that she ports in, and I make sure she thanks mama for the gifts and then everytime she uses something from mom, she mentions "mama" herself and I reinforce it again.
As to mom staying with us for a few weeks, I think that would be best case scenario, but mom may have other plans. She was able to stay for Christmas week last Dec, so I think it would depend on how much time off work she gets this time and if she even wants to stay at all. Before I begin this actual conversation with her, I just wanted to prepare myself and become as knowledgeable as possible about it in the case that I may have to suggest to her potential scenarios.
I'll try contacting some professionals as well.
I already repped you, but I "must" say that you are one of the most special and caring people I have ever encountered on C-D!
OP I don't have any advice, but I wanted to say THANK YOU and applaud you so much for supporting a military mom and looking out for the child. You are truly amazing!
Thank you for the welcome and the great replies. We are not official foster parents but I attended a resource family orientation right before we got her so we could start the official process, and we hope to commence once she is back with mom.
Since we are her aunt and uncle, and we are teaching her spanish, she calls us "tio" and "tia" and she knows very well who her mom is. Until mom boarded a ship in June, they facetimed 2x times daily, and now just once a month, but she kisses her pictures on FB and IG and she has a build-a bear with mom's voice recorded. Mom sends gifts monthly from each country that she ports in, and I make sure she thanks mama for the gifts and then everytime she uses something from mom, she mentions "mama" herself and I reinforce it again.
As to mom staying with us for a few weeks, I think that would be best case scenario, but mom may have other plans. She was able to stay for Christmas week last Dec, so I think it would depend on how much time off work she gets this time and if she even wants to stay at all. Before I begin this actual conversation with her, I just wanted to prepare myself and become as knowledgeable as possible about it in the case that I may have to suggest to her potential scenarios.
I'll try contacting some professionals as well.
You seem to have thought of everything, and I can't thank you enough for taking the time to do this for your sister and niece. I hope your sister knows how lucky she is.
Sounds like you are doing all the right things. Sounds like she knows who mom is but it will still be a transition time when mom comes home.
Tell her thank you for your service. That has got to be tough leaving her daughter behind.
Oh wow, everybody is so sweet. Thank you all for the compliments. I know her mom can't wait to return and she hopes never to leave her side again. I will definitely thank her for her service and the opportunity to have helped raise her beautiful baby. I still feel like I need to prepare for mom's arrival, so I will start to mention her a lot more from now on, as well as everything else that was adviced to me here. Thank you.
Both natural parents must be thrilled to have the child in their arms! What a dedicated relative you are to attend to this young one.
Yes the child will have separation anxiety...And the resilence comment is a typical way to appease the adult. The kid still has to incorporate this change of who is the mom and dad.
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