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Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
$100 for a movie and dinner for two is extravagant. I don't know anyone who spends that kind of money on a date, especially the young people you're aiming your OP towards. You've set up an unrealistic scenario that doesn't reflect reality close enough for a fair discussion.
Eh, not really. I couldn't afford it at 25 probably, but it isn't extravagant. Popcorn and two tickets are $30... and $70 for dinner for two is a pretty mid level place with wine... cheap even. That's a $14/5 entree (x2), appetizer, and couple of glasses of house (not even a carafe) at a low end place with tip.
You'd think that it would be cheaper to live in two's rather than single, yet a disproportionate number of young adults (18-31) are living at home with their parents:
Now combine this with the skyrocketing cost of living (e.g. going on a date: $100 movie/dinner) when the average wage is $10-12/hr. and one can see why guys are in a panic over not being able to get a GF---even if they could attract a nice girl how could they take her to their parent's house, let alone afford a nice hotel room?
I'm speaking generally here, but pointing toward a trend: it's getting more and more expensive to breathe. Will this society eventually force young people to just not be able to have kids, a nice home, and a decent quality of life?
I go out shopping and, granted I shop at Whole Foods, which a lot of people call "Whole Paycheck" and for good reason. It's rare I can walk out of there with maybe 7-8 items without spending $30-40. I just don't know how young couples with two kids are surviving if they aren't doctors, lawyers or similar professionals.
Can the younger ones around here who are clawing their way to the top (or trying to) relate to what I am saying here?
Quater-life crisis is a very real phenomenon.
I live in CA. A date could easily cost $50 just for dinner alone for two and you're lucky to even watch a matinee with that combined.
Where I work, the younger kids have two jobs. They hardly have social lives outside of work. And, the people they tend to date are through work. That's even if they're lucky enough to find the time to date.
We're a generation that's moved from adults attending college to finding stable careers and purchasing homes, then to two income economies where both parents work, and now downsizing to a type of economy where adult children are now having to move in back home and working multiple part-time jobs, because full time jobs are no longer stable or as accessible.
The landscape of relationships aren't like how they used to be. Unfortunately, money does have an affect on the quality of life for most who aren't privilege. I shop "whole paycheck" too btw. I don't support those giant multiconglomerates who are also a part of the problem instead of solution. 1% verses 99.
I'm somewhat taken aback at the initial number of negative responses. Somehow I miscalculated. Let's give this another try:
single guy wants to take a girl out on a nice date. he's working an average job. what should a nice date with a nice girl he wants to impress cost him?
This is a different topic.
If you're talking about a first date, he shouldn't be spending anything. And what's with wanting to impress? Isn't dating supposed to be about getting to know the other person?
But assuming your talking dinner or a concert, and depending on the venue or city (local COL), he should be able to manage a nice date for $45-$60.
I'm somewhat taken aback at the initial number of negative responses. Somehow I miscalculated. Let's give this another try:
single guy wants to take a girl out on a nice date. he's working an average job. what should a nice date with a nice girl he wants to impress cost him?
Nice isn't about the money you spend.. nice is a memorable date.
Weird as it sounds, one of the best dates I went on is when a guy bought a bucket of chicken and we went to the beach and sat and talked. And fed seagulls chicken (which seemed kind of funny in a way). He did later take me out to dinner, but I can't remember as much as that beach thing... it was nice. And he pretty much hooked me (so to speak) with the beach date.
It all really depends on the woman you are asking out. Is she a fun loving, easy going sort of person... bet you could have fun with a round of mini-golf. Make up silly rules like for each stroke you have to tell something about yourself. Go out for ice cream cones afterwards... another memorable date that might cost you $15 at best.
Stuff like that.
If the woman scoffs at you not spending a lot of money, drop her... seriously. Women like that are basically the female equivalent of male players. You are better off without someone like that.
Nice isn't about the money you spend.. nice is a memorable date.
Weird as it sounds, one of the best dates I went on is when a guy bought a bucket of chicken and we went to the beach and sat and talked. And fed seagulls chicken (which seemed kind of funny in a way). He did later take me out to dinner, but I can't remember as much as that beach thing... it was nice. And he pretty much hooked me (so to speak) with the beach date.
It all really depends on the woman you are asking out. Is she a fun loving, easy going sort of person... bet you could have fun with a round of mini-golf. Make up silly rules like for each stroke you have to tell something about yourself. Go out for ice cream cones afterwards... another memorable date that might cost you $15 at best.
Stuff like that.
If the woman scoffs at you not spending a lot of money, drop her... seriously. Women like that are basically the female equivalent of male players. You are better off without someone like that.
This is the thing. It's about the quality of the interaction, not how much money is spent. I don't know why so many guys think quality-date = money/expensive. That's not how a lot of women think. You guys are putting way too much pressure on yourselves.
Someone who puts a lot of thought into a date, or shows some imagination is much more impressive than someone who just throws money at it.
That's ridiculous! I know plenty of people who are not doctors and lawyers who live well. They even have a single income come home. They don't wear designer clothing, eat at fancy restaurants, drive fancy cars or have a huge houses.
THEY LIVE WITHIN THEIR MEANS
give me a break!!!
that is NOT the reason people stay single.
Yeah, the cost of living may be good news in disguise, a fancy dinner may be nice once in awhile, but slightly higher quality of food than a decent sit down restaurant is not worth the skyrocketing prices.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,974,024 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
But assuming your talking dinner or a concert, and depending on the venue or city (local COL), he should be able to manage a nice date for $45-$60.
A concert or seeing a band at a bar? Lots of concert tickets are over $40 for one... unless you're getting a slice of pizza and a coke and seeing some local bands at the local rock club with a cheap cover you're not doing at date for $45-60. If if you could do that, it certainly wouldnt be a "nice" date, it would be a cheap hang out.
A concert or seeing a band at a bar? Lots of concert tickets are over $40 for one... unless you're getting a slice of pizza and a coke and seeing some local bands at the local rock club with a cheap cover you're not doing at date for $45-60. If if you could do that, it certainly wouldnt be a "nice" date, it would be a cheap hang out.
I was thinking: either a mid-level dinner, or a concert, not both in one date. And concert tickets (depending) can be had for around $20 if you get the cheaper seats. So a guy in the type of mid-level job the OP mentioned could do a "nice" date--a concert or the symphony--at an affordable price if he got cheaper tickets. That wouldn't make the date any less "nice", just for not splurging on better seats at the concert.
People on modest incomes need to economize. But this doesn't mean forgoing a nice date from time to time. They can make it work, they just have to make careful choices and not splurge beyond their budget. That's how I was approaching the question.
It also helps if the woman he's taking out doesn't drink. That keeps the dinner cost down. You'd be surprised how many women don't drink, or don't care if alcohol is absent from the meal.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,974,024 times
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Uh, not sure what concerts you're interested in. I can see bands at bars/small rock clubs (no seat places) for under $20 sure, but a concert concert? I'm looking at several this summer and the cheapest SRO "seats" are over $50. Of course I'm not talking about a symphony, they're considerably more unless you're doing a matinee or rehearsal show... and if you do that you can do one of the free outdoor concerts that most big cities have. Those are cheap dates, but will run you $30 anyway with a bottle of wine and snacks.
And yeah, I'd be surprised about how many women don't drink some wine with their meals as I've never, ever met one (except for craft beer aficionados) in 20 years of dating. Sounds like a party of a date. Wooooo. I hate wine so I order a glass and let it sit and sip it just to be social, it would make people uncomfortable to not do so (its actually borderline rude).
Uh, not sure what concerts you're interested in. I can see bands at bars/small rock clubs (no seat places) for under $20 sure, but a concert concert? I'm looking at several this summer and the cheapest SRO "seats" are over $50. Of course I'm not talking about a symphony, they're considerably more unless you're doing a matinee or rehearsal show... and if you do that you can do one of the free outdoor concerts that most big cities have. Those are cheap dates, but will run you $30 anyway with a bottle of wine and snacks.
And yeah, I'd be surprised about how many women don't drink some wine with their meals as I've never, ever met one (except for craft beer aficionados) in 20 years of dating. Sounds like a party of a date. Wooooo. I hate wine so I order a glass and let it sit and sip it just to be social, it would make people uncomfortable to not do so (its actually borderline rude).
hm... well, I did say the answer depended on where people live and the local COL. Concerts at the local concert venue in my town, nationally- and even internationally-known groups, can be had for $20-$30, depending. Symphony's about the same.
Buying wine you don't intend to drink? Why? If you know your date well enough, there's no need for pretenses. Assuming she's on the same page. All but one of my women friends have been non-drinkers, since college. Oh well.
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