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In the sense that one household got 215 and one got 85
You can keep typing if you want but we will never agree
Quote:
Originally Posted by westcoastforme
I don’t think deserve or earn was said
If you’re ok with it that’s your opinion
Unequal
And your opinion is also just an opinion, so it's incredibly rude for you to say error, error and keep telling people they are wrong when their opinion is every bit as valid as yours.
And yes, it is equal because it is divided by individual. Your refusal to accept that doesn't change reality. The result of an equal division means that the household with more people gets more when you add them together, but that is the same as the pizza example from before. And no, it doesn't matter whether it's $300,000 or pizza - when something is evenly divided among a group of people, you can categorize them in ways where some groups end up with more and some with less. But there is nothing fair or unfair about simple mathematics.
Neither FAMILY received anything. INDIVIDUALS did, and each individual got an equal amount of the estate: $43k apiece. Why are you struggling to understand this? It's a simple concept.
The only thing that's slightly unusual in this case is that the grandma saw her grandkids as heirs equal to her children in terms of what each grandchild would receive. But there's nothing unfair about that, even if it's not the usual choice.
I agree. It is not how I wrote my will (all my assets will be divided equally between my children and zero to my grandchildren), but that is how your relative decided to write her will. She decided that every person would receive an equal share. Of course, I'm only in my mid-60s, perhaps ten years or 20 years or 30 years from now, I may change my will and do it differently or I may not change it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by westcoastforme
Wrong a family did. Little kids oldest is 10. Youngest 1.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aredhel
That doesn't mean the money belongs to the family. It properly belongs to each child, and should be held for that child until that child is of age and can decide what to do with it. If the parents spend any of that money, even if it's to benefit "the family" as a whole, they are in fact stealing from their children.
And this, folks, is why you should set up a trust fund for each minor child you may decide to leave money to: to insure the money actually goes to the child in question. NEVER trust that the parents won't steal from their own offspring! Because far too many will, without hesitation and without feeling the slightest trace of guilt.
Of course the money belongs to the children, and of course the parents shouldn't steal it.
Is that the real problem? Do you and your spouse think that his sibling will just take the money that grandma left to her grandchildren and spend it on themselves?
Quote:
Originally Posted by westcoastforme
Another thing
Couple with 1 kid is younger. How Does granny know if younger couple has 2 or 3 more kids after they passed.
That is completely irrelevant as granny is dead. You can write any type of hypothetical that you want to write and it still won't matter as the person who wrote the will is already gone. Oh, my, what if your SIL falls down a flight of stairs tomorrow, suffers a traumatic brain injury and is paralyzed from the neck down for life. Well, her mother should have predicted that and left 100% of her estate to her disabled daughter and nothing for your spouse and the grandchildren.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aredhel
No, wescoastforme. Your wife's money is HERS and HERS ALONE. Your minor child's money is HIS and HIS ALONE. YOU have no claim to any of it. Now your wife may decide to be generous and share her portion with you, but make no mistake: she is in no way obligated to do so. And the child's money should be held securely in trust until the child is of age and can decide for himself what to do with the money. None of that money belongs to the household as a whole. it belongs to two separate individuals who happen to reside under one roof at the moment.
And the same is true for the other family. Each individual has a share; the family unit as a whole got nothing.
So you can drop the silly "$215,000 to $85,000" comparisons, as they are false and not relevant. Neither household received a dime.
Among my close friends and relatives who have received inheritances (and have discussed it with me) almost 100% put the money in a separate account or separate retirement fund and did not co-mingle even a single penny of that amount with their spouse or household (and the one person who did co-mingle funds realized later that it was a horrible, horrible mistake which her caused long range financial problems).
I really hope that you are not expecting your wife and child to share their inheritance with you or to co-mingle anything by paying household bills with money. It is not your money, not now, not ever.
And your opinion is also just an opinion, so it's incredibly rude for you to say error, error and keep telling people they are wrong when their opinion is every bit as valid as yours.
And yes, it is equal because it is divided by individual. Your refusal to accept that doesn't change reality. The result of an equal division means that the household with more people gets more when you add them together, but that is the same as the pizza example from before. And no, it doesn't matter whether it's $300,000 or pizza - when something is evenly divided among a group of people, you can categorize them in ways where some groups end up with more and some with less. But there is nothing fair or unfair about simple mathematics.
Not equal in the sense that granny’s kids (2daughters) and those kids’ children got vastly different amounts
I agree. It is not how I wrote my will (all my assets will be divided equally between my children and zero to my grandchildren), but that is how your relative decided to write her will. She decided that every person would receive an equal share. Of course, I'm only in my mid-60s, perhaps ten years or 20 years or 30 years from now, I may change my will and do it differently or I may not change it.
Of course the money belongs to the children, and of course the parents shouldn't steal it.
Is that the real problem? Do you and your spouse think that his sibling will just take the money that grandma left to her grandchildren and spend it on themselves?
That is completely irrelevant as granny is dead. You can write any type of hypothetical that you want to write and it still won't matter as the person who wrote the will is already gone. Oh, my, what if your SIL falls down a flight of stairs tomorrow, suffers a traumatic brain injury and is paralyzed from the neck down for life. Well, her mother should have predicted that and left 100% of her estate to her disabled daughter and nothing for your spouse and the grandchildren.
Among my close friends and relatives who have received inheritances (and have discussed it with me) almost 100% put the money in a separate account or separate retirement fund and did not co-mingle even a single penny of that amount with their spouse or household (and the one person who did co-mingle funds realized later that it was a horrible, horrible mistake which her caused long range financial problems).
I really hope that you are not expecting your wife and child to share their inheritance with you or to co-mingle anything by paying household bills with money. It is not your money, not now, not ever.
Settle down.
We have our own money. Future Pension. 170k in equity in the house. One paid off car. No debt 50k in cash with thousands getting added monthly.
Not equal in the sense that granny’s kids (2daughters) and those kids’ children got vastly different amounts
Not comparing pizza to 300k sorry
You and I will never agree
No, you will never agree with anyone who tells you the BOLD TRUTH. THST IS, that EACH INHERITOR, regardless of age or number, GOT AN EQUAL AMOUNT.
Let's take a look at alternate scenario, similar in nature.
Mom and dad have 4 kids. #1 son, #2 2 years later is a girl, 4 years later #3son, 2 years anotger son.
They buy a typical 3 br house with 2 baths. No attic space as its 4' high at peak, and on slab or crawl space, no garage. They cannot afford to build on.
WHO GETS WHAT BEDROOMS???
MOM AND DAD OBVIOUSLY GET ONE. is it FAIR the three boys share one room while girl gets room to self????
Now, 13 years later, ages 13, 11, 7 and 5. Should a pubescent teen boy really have to share a room with his 5 year old brother?
I think we can all agree teens should have some privacy to do what teens do, and to entertain friends in their room.
Now let's go back and say the roof IS tall enough to make bigger bedroom than main floor. Mon and dad don't want the resulting stairs and the master has attached bath, so AGAIN, WHO GETS THE NEW FINISHED OFF ATTIC BEDROOM?
The 13,year old boy?
The two younger boys because there's two of them and it's the biggest bedroom?
Even IF parents take the attic room, that still leaves 3 bedrooms for 4 kids.
WHO GETS what?
The oldest gets the attic room? So it's "too bad" for the younger two, the 7 and 5 yr old have to now share because they were unfortunate enough to be born later?
What if mom and dad have "oops, OMG, I'm pregnant again (how'd THAT happen??!!) And have another baby boy when oldwst is 16. Is it the new babys fault for being born "too late" and having to share with the now 11 and 8 year old brothers?
Now, easy answer is to make 2 attic bedrooms, so each of the 4 can "have their own room". But it's not in parents budget to do that.
How is any of the kids sleeping situation " fair", EXCEPT for the girl, who was lucky enough to be born only child of that sex.
It's the same idea.
You can't get it in your head, or wrap your head around the fact that the inheritance was left TO INDIVIDUALS EQUALLY, NOT TO FAMILIES, AND CERTAINLY NOT TO EACH DAUGHTER SOLELY.
It doesn't matter if younger couple has more kid's.. grandma NEVER knew them, and they did not ever meet grandma, so why would grandma leave money "just in case" more grandkids appear???? And don't sell the 38 year old short on not having more kids!! She could (OMG, IM pregnant again, with TWINS???!!!!) HAVE another child/ren.
Grandma left EQUAL SHARES TO THOSE 7 PEOPLE SHE LOVED. END OF STORY.
Its A VERY VERY SMALL PERSON, IF they CANNOT SEE THAT, OR REFUSE TO SEE THAT.
Granny did what SHE thought best, and GAVE IT TO EACH PERSON EQUALLY. if you wanted equal shares, you should have popped out more kids. It's here to do with as,she pleases.
If you got $120 And otger family got $180, it would have been "fairer" in your eyes, but Still not fair to you. Granny coukd habe done that too.
And of grannys story .
If she knew you would all have such sour grapes, she probably woukd have left it all to charity, and you'd have gotten bubkiss.
EACH parent should be putting the $43k into a trust account at the credit union for each child until age 18 anyway, so it STILL WON'T MATTER that one "family" got more.
EACH INDIVIDUAL FOR EQUAL SHARE.
AND OF STORY.
GET OVER IT.
and remind me to NOT put you in my will, you re not at all greatfuk for what you received.
No, you will never agree with anyone who tells you the BOLD TRUTH. THST IS, that EACH INHERITOR, regardless of age or number, GOT AN EQUAL AMOUNT.
Let's take a look at alternate scenario, similar in nature.
Mom and dad have 4 kids. #1 son, #2 2 years later is a girl, 4 years later #3son, 2 years anotger son.
They buy a typical 3 br house with 2 baths. No attic space as its 4' high at peak, and on slab or crawl space, no garage. They cannot afford to build on.
WHO GETS WHAT BEDROOMS???
MOM AND DAD OBVIOUSLY GET ONE. is it FAIR the three boys share one room while girl gets room to self????
Now, 13 years later, ages 13, 11, 7 and 5. Should a pubescent teen boy really have to share a room with his 5 year old brother?
I think we can all agree teens should have some privacy to do what teens do, and to entertain friends in their room.
Now let's go back and say the roof IS tall enough to make bigger bedroom than main floor. Mon and dad don't want the resulting stairs and the master has attached bath, so AGAIN, WHO GETS THE NEW FINISHED OFF ATTIC BEDROOM?
The 13,year old boy?
The two younger boys because there's two of them and it's the biggest bedroom?
Even IF parents take the attic room, that still leaves 3 bedrooms for 4 kids.
WHO GETS what?
The oldest gets the attic room? So it's "too bad" for the younger two, the 7 and 5 yr old have to now share because they were unfortunate enough to be born later?
What if mom and dad have "oops, OMG, I'm pregnant again (how'd THAT happen??!!) And have another baby boy when oldwst is 16. Is it the new babys fault for being born "too late" and having to share with the now 11 and 8 year old brothers?
Now, easy answer is to make 2 attic bedrooms, so each of the 4 can "have their own room". But it's not in parents budget to do that.
How is any of the kids sleeping situation " fair", EXCEPT for the girl, who was lucky enough to be born only child of that sex.
It's the same idea.
You can't get it in your head, or wrap your head around the fact that the inheritance was left TO INDIVIDUALS EQUALLY, NOT TO FAMILIES, AND CERTAINLY NOT TO EACH DAUGHTER SOLELY.
It doesn't matter if younger couple has more kid's.. grandma NEVER knew them, and they did not ever meet grandma, so why would grandma leave money "just in case" more grandkids appear???? And don't sell the 38 year old short on not having more kids!! She could (OMG, IM pregnant again, with TWINS???!!!!) HAVE another child/ren.
Grandma left EQUAL SHARES TO THOSE 7 PEOPLE SHE LOVED. END OF STORY.
Its A VERY VERY SMALL PERSON, IF they CANNOT SEE THAT, OR REFUSE TO SEE THAT.
Granny did what SHE thought best, and GAVE IT TO EACH PERSON EQUALLY. if you wanted equal shares, you should have popped out more kids. It's here to do with as,she pleases.
If you got $120 And otger family got $180, it would have been "fairer" in your eyes, but Still not fair to you. Granny coukd habe done that too.
And of grannys story .
If she knew you would all have such sour grapes, she probably woukd have left it all to charity, and you'd have gotten bubkiss.
EACH parent should be putting the $43k into a trust account at the credit union for each child until age 18 anyway, so it STILL WON'T MATTER that one "family" got more.
EACH INDIVIDUAL FOR EQUAL SHARE.
AND OF STORY.
GET OVER IT.
and remind me to NOT put you in my will, you re not at all greatfuk for what you received.
Sheesh.
Settle down.
Most of the people I’ve told agree with me.
Even a few on this thread agree with me.
So you and I will never agree.
Comparing pizzas and number of bedrooms with inheritance? Pleeeeease...
Maybe they shouldn’t have so many kids with only two bedrooms
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