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I am in a very similar predicament. My mother is dying of breast cancer. She even has custody of 2 of my brother's children. Although she does not spend friviously, she is just not very good managing her money and bills. She owes cc debt, mobile home payment, IRS and I think social security as well. I am so scared that I will inherit all that debt. I have excellent credit and manage my money very well.
Does anyone know for sure in the State of CA if the "I'm not responsible for her debt" applies?
I know for sure that anyone who is considered next of kin in CA is required to cover funeral bills. I learned that first hand from my deadbeat father that died whom I had not seen in 15+ yrs!! I paid for cremation and of course the funeral home refused to dump his ashes in the garbage as I asked so I paid an additional $35 for them to spread them in the cemetary....why do I have the feeling they went in the trash anyway. Just a little bitter about that subject.
You will have to pay for any funeral expenses, If there is any estate, the creditors have claim to that, but if they basically have nothing, that is what they have claim to.
My wife went through this with her mother several years ago. She had a bunch of CC debt, and the CC companies sent bills, wrote letters that were pathetic at best "I'm sure your family member would want you to pay their debt,, blah blah blah"
With a big red marker she wrote on the bill "DECEASED - NO ESTATE" and sent it back. That ended it right there.
Bottom line, if you didn't take out the debt, or co-sign, you have absolutely no obligation to pay the debt.
Location: 23.7 million to 162 million miles North of Venus
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I'm sorry about your mother.
No matter what state you live in, you would not be responsible for the bills of your parents if your name is not also on the account. Even if you are an authorized user you would not be responsible. The same goes for the IRS.
When the time comes you should send copies of the death certificate to the CRA's and to any creditor of hers that you know of.
Asheville Native made a very good post, that Bosco commented in, on how to deal with creditors if they send any dun letters.
You are right about the next of kin is responsible for funeral/cremation.
The only time someone cannot be held responsible is if the deceased person is a Jane or John Doe, and no relatives step forward to claim the deceased.
I checked into this myself, due to my father's irresponsibility with the IRS.
I cannot inherit debt unless I also inherit some kind of asset (and the debt is set up against the inheritance).
Since my mother died broke, and my father will die with no assets, that takes care of that. (My father does say that there's money in the closet for his cremation, and he did make arrangements with the V.A. He doesn't want a funeral, just wants to be sure that his headstone has a Jewish star on it).
Don't get involved in their debt issues. If they die with debt and don't own anything the debtors won't be able to collect. Cremation is cheap. Just let your dad know that he and your mother will be cremated. If he has something else in mind he'd better start saving for it now.
I guess it depends on your definition of cheap. My mom recently passed away. We did have a wake but she was cremated and even that simple service and the cremation is already at almost $10,000. We still haven't decided if we will bury her or scatter her ashes. A simple headstone is close to $1000 too. My mom was pretty irresponsible too. She has been in a nursing home for the past several years and didn't have an opportunity to accrue debt so that was good.
Location: 23.7 million to 162 million miles North of Venus
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Quote:
Originally Posted by golfgal
I guess itdependsonyourdefinitionofcheap. My mom recently passed away. We did have a wake but she was cremated and eventhatsimpleserviceandthecremationisalreadyatalmost$10,000. We still haven't decided if we will bury her or scatter her ashes. A simple headstone is close to $1000 too. My mom was pretty irresponsible too. She has been in a nursing home for the past several years and didn't have an opportunity to accrue debt so that was good.
The basic level of cremation cost, which includes many services, is generally somewhere around $600-$1,000.
The basic level of cremation cost, which includes many services, is generally somewhere around $600-$1,000.
I'm very sorry for the loss of your mom.
Where do you live that it is that cheep??? The ride from the nursing home to the funeral home alone was $375. The cremation, just the actual cremation, was $1000.
I've been through this twice, sad to say. But the good news is I won't go through it again. And since I've had my turns, I've learned enough to leave detailed instructions to my children while I'm alive, in letters so that they will know exactly what to do and what not to do when my time is up.
Do nothing....absolutely nothing. If it's not your debt (meaning not joint, you didn't promise, you didn't offer, etc.) then do nothing. I wouldn't even get copies of the death certificate and mail it.....why spend time and money. Creditors will find out.
The ticker picks it up through the obits and health deptartment when the death is reported....the Social Security Administration hears of it, too, then the CRAs flag the credit reports so the creditors do indeed know of the passing. They have the option of requesting the debt to be paid by the estate. [and if that doesn't work they can petition the court and then subsequently put a lien on property]
In both of my parents cases, I only paid the co-pays for his medical bills. My mom had full coverage. Nothing else was paid. And I really mean it....nothing else. No other creditor came forth (letters came but my attorney said to ignore them all-to wait for court action- and no one filed claims).
My dad's estate was sold and split among my siblings for quite a large sum. The attorney made out the best, of course.
My mom deeded all her property to a family member after she went on Hospice so there was no issue with that.
So, planning is key.
And when you lose a parent, grief takes you to a place that you've never been before. And I found myself feeling like an orphan coming to terms with my own mortality. This is no time for people to come out of the woodwork to 'claim' you need to pay them money for something your parent(s) did.
That's why we have courts. Don't be afraid to use the courts.
I went through this. It was not enough for me to write deceased on the bill, they wanted a copy of the death certificate, which I provided. Some of the credit card companies tried to get me to pay the debt by sending my name and address to the collection agencies. My attorney advised me to not even respond to those letters. By the way, they got my name and address because the apartment manager where my MIL was living forwarded it to them. I had no tie to the credit cards whatsoever but they will go after anyone they can with threatening letters to scare people to pay.
The debt holder can go after the estate. In this case, the estate had no assets so there was nothing to get.
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I TOTALLY understand
The basic level of cremation cost, which includes many services, is generally somewhere around $600-$1,000. 
