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My family is moving end of the month and we're struggling with an odd, if not macabre, issue. Our first family pet (a cat - Tigger Too) and someone who has been with us in every place we've lived as a family is buried in the back yard. At the time we buried him we figured we'd be staying in the house forever. We picked a perfect spot and my wife found a great marker so we'd always know where he was.
Fast forward two years and our plans have changed and away we go. We're both torn by the thought of leaving him behind, in a manner of speaking. Obviously it would be grossly inappropriate to disturb the site but we both need to come up with an appropriate gesture to feel as if we're honoring his memory beyond the move. Returning in the future to visit is obviously not a real option.
My wife suggested removing the marker and taking some of the dirt in a baggie and placing it in the backyard of our new home. That appeals to me but I can't shake the feeling like we're abandoning him. To anyone not a pet lover this would sound just plain weird. However I'm hoping that some of you can related and share either your advice or experiences in dealing with something like this.
My family is moving end of the month and we're struggling with an odd, if not macabre, issue. Our first family pet (a cat - Tigger Too) and someone who has been with us in every place we've lived as a family is buried in the back yard. At the time we buried him we figured we'd be staying in the house forever. We picked a perfect spot and my wife found a great marker so we'd always know where he was.
Fast forward two years and our plans have changed and away we go. We're both torn by the thought of leaving him behind, in a manner of speaking. Obviously it would be grossly inappropriate to disturb the site but we both need to come up with an appropriate gesture to feel as if we're honoring his memory beyond the move. Returning in the future to visit is obviously not a real option.
My wife suggested removing the marker and taking some of the dirt in a baggie and placing it in the backyard of our new home. That appeals to me but I can't shake the feeling like we're abandoning him. To anyone not a pet lover this would sound just plain weird. However I'm hoping that some of you can related and share either your advice or experiences in dealing with something like this.
I don't have any direct experience with this (i never buried the ashes of my beloved first fur baby - have them in the house) but i do like your wife's idea. to add to it you could bury a picture of your fur baby along with the dirt and put the marker up at your new home. You're not abandoning him, he's on rainbow bridge watching over you. He'll go where ever you go.
I think your wife's idea is great.You could bring a bit of Tigger along with you. I sort of wish I'd known about this idea before we moved. We buried the ashes of our dog at our old house, then planted a beautiful linden tree. At the time, we had not the slightest inkling that we would ever move. We do still have lots of pics, her collar, etc.
NYC2, have you ever read The Tenth Good Thing About Barney?
Ostensibly, it is a children's book, but I and other adults have taken great comfort from it. I think you might, too.
Well, thank you for being such GOOD parents to your beloved furbaby. Your concern made me SMILE big-time-because you care so much.
I think your wife's idea is perfect! I like the picture too. Your furry is at the bridge, watching over you and waiting for you. You are not abandoning him/her. The fact that you care SO MUCH says it all. You are not, and never would, forget your precious one.
Good for you, and thanks from one animal lover to another, for caring so deeply
As much as I'm sorry for your lose, I must say, I LOVE pet owners who really care, like you do! It restores my hope in humanity!
I love your wifes idea!
If it means anything, Your Tigger is in good company on that Rainbow Bridge, I have lost many great friends and I know they're there waiting for me.
Oh I think your wife has come up with the most reasonable solution. Perhaps in place of the marker you could plant a tree or bush so the grave is still adorned but not so obvioulsy a grave anymore? I feel for you I don't know what I would do in the same situation. {{HUGS}}
I was thinking about that the other day. How awful that would be to have the next owners accidentally dig the grave up. Planting a tree would be a fabulous idea. That way your cat will be forever hugged by the roots that you planted. You could even drive by to see the beautiful tree and know why it is so special.
I feel your confusion and sorrow. Good luck to you!
I think a special tree or bush is a great idea! You could plant it over the grave and take a leaf with you to press in a frame with your pets picture! A cat that was loved as much as you loved yours could never really be left behind anyway don't ya think? I like your wife's idea as well.
I moved into this house in December 2001, my beloved black cat Nigel died the same month...then my beloved Tottles died that Febuary...they are buried in the backyard side by side, each with their own grave markers...
I'm glad someone posted this because I always wondered how I could leave them.
Thanks to everyone for both their support and suggestions (my son liked the picture idea).
When my youngest asked why we'd bury a picture I told him it would make it easier for Tigger to know where to move. I also explained that by taking some of the dirt from the burial site he'd be able to recognize the scent and feel comfortable hanging out in the new place.
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