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Yup, sometimes they do weird things...they are very socially
inappropriate many times.
Sure, we can get angry...ultimately we have to be glad we are not them...
And be careful out there!
Seriously? This guy followed the OP! Hardly made up. I too have been yelled at and called all sorts of names by homeless men. I do think some are mentally ill, but NOT ALL. One should never assume that they are harmless or harmful. They can be aggressive like anyone else, and if they are getting angry you should be on your guard. I don't like taking sh-t from a non homeless person, so why should I take it from someone who is?
Maybe you're too uptight. I had a homeless guy get argumentative towards me when I wouldn't buy a subway token from him. What right did he have to accost me? Well, my attitude was more "Why the eff should I care?"
If you're getting angry at homeless people, who are mentally ill as often as not, you're kind of looking for stuff to be annoyed about. I could see being a bit appalled by someone FOLLOWING YOU, but that doesn't seem to have bothered you at all.
What's the point of letting some probably schizophrenic homeless person get you agitated and upset? Why let someone in that position take up so much negative head space?
Seems that it's easy to think of homeless people as one monolithic group with the same reasons for being out on the street, same level of aggression. Try thinking of the homeless you encounter as individuals; some are meek and pathetic, others are aggressive and dangerous. Each could be suffering from one or a combination of mental, physical, addiction problems.
There's a great book called Under the Overpass about how to find a balance between compassion and concern with your own safety.
I give small amounts of money but not if I feel threatened; have bought groceries for hitch hikers , and often I let them know about local resources. Groups like the Salvation Army are much better suited to give real help to a person in need.
I live in an area with a fair number of homeless but nothing like a big city environment, so maybe I'm a bit sheltered.
Maybe he has a mental illness that prevents him from holding and keeping a job.
Don't get me wrong, I get annoyed by greedy and entitled beggars myself. But I do think there is a reason for how they are. No self respecting mentally sound person would choose to sleep on the street. I've done it myself and it's not fun trust me.
Who the hell is he to react like this? What possible grounds could that ****ing parasite scrounger have to feel bitter towards me?
A stray dog knows when people don't like them, and so does a "****ing parasite scrounger".
Maybe his reaction towards you was because your feelings show more than you like to think.
Personally, I don't get into reasons, I just say "No, thank you" and keep walking. If one follows you, you might want to keep some pepper spray handy. A mentally ill person on the streets is not to be reasoned with, they are most likely off their meds. Have you ever met a person undergoing psychotic behavior? I have.
When I was young, I had to walk right through skid row in Los Angeles to meet my Mom for lunch. Try to imagine hundreds of cardboard boxes filled with human beings, or as you put it, "****ing parasite scroungers".
This guy sounds like a beggar I see at the Wawa in the Society Hill neighborhood of Philadelphia. Whenever I am in that area, I always observe him holding the door open for people and expecting money in return. I tell him what I tell all of the other bums in Philly (when I actually don't have money on me): I can't give you any money as I use my credit card for all of my purchases. Most of them understand.
I do spare money whenever I have the chance, however. Last weekend, I took a day trip to Philadelphia along with my brother. When we were on the Market-Frankford Line, there was this guy who broke down crying on the middle of the crowded subway car. As a man myself, I could tell that he was in extreme pain from his unfortunate situation as it takes an extremely bad situation for a man to break down and cry in a public place. I gave him all of the change I had in my pocket.
Since your reaction was colored by the circumstances, you shouldn't feel guilty about it.
What we have to be careful of is never having empathy, and stereotyping all beggars based on the actions of some. As others have already stated, there are innumerable reasons a person resorts to begging. We must remember that we're all one devasting disaster/misfortune from becoming beggars (or homeless persons) ourselves.
Admittedly, it's especially difficult to have sympathy when accosted by panhandlers. When someone singles me out to approach for a handout it's because they've labeled me a sucker, rather than a generous person...why shouldn't I take offense to that. What else am I to think when I'm usually approached when a woman is at my side, as if I'm supposed to give them money so I don't look bad to her; in those situations I'm more concerned with her safety than looking like a nice guy.
Really the issue is where's their "reverse-empathy", perhaps I'm living on scraps too. It's a rare day that I give a handout, but when I do it's to someone who didn't beg for it; and the authentically mentally ill are unlikely to beg since they're usually of an avoidant personality type. People who have fallen on hard-times are likelier to seek government/community assistance, or do without, rather than beg. For those who do beg, you have to ask yourself if they're begging because they don't qualify for aid, or are they unable or unwilling to adhere to the stipulations of aid.
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