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Even though none of us have met face to face and despite all the bickering in the politic threads....I have a new found respect for each of you that have posted. Some of your stories have brought me to tears (literally) but each of them are touching.
After spending yesterday and a little while today putting up the last of the outside lights ("we" changed direction this year and put up fewer) I'm pretty much done. "We" were tired of the C-9 lights so "we" went with icicles on the wrap-around porch with nothing on the second story except swags under the windows and candles in the windows with strings of white mini-lights wrapped around the holly and pine trees in the front yard.
Also done are the inside trees (the ceramic one didn't come out this year) and the 1960 aluminum tree on the front porch, highligted with a spotlight.
Even though none of us have met face to face and despite all the bickering in the politic threads....I have a new found respect for each of you that have posted. Some of your stories have brought me to tears (literally) but each of them are touching.
+1.
Have to say, I am really glad the trolls have left this thread alone!
This weekend has been a struggle. My boyfriend got more bad news regarding the surgery he needs to save his sight - his health insurance still won't cover it. We have been investigating charity options but unfortunately, since glaucoma tends to effect people who are covered by Medicare, there seems to not be many viable options.
Meanwhile, his best friend who is a 26 year old with cerebral palsy is having serious issues with an abusive caretaker. He had to file a restraining order against him on Friday which means that he currently has no paid caretaker. The boy and I have been taking turns caring for him, but we're not sure what's going to happen when I have to go back to work tomorrow.
I feel like everything going on in my life is negative. Unlike previous posters, my own health crisis did nothing to give me clarity or calmness. If anything, it took away any ability for me to take risks. All I do is worry about money, think about how to make money, etc etc. I fear that I will never be able to live on my own (currently live with a roommate who is awful - can't find another room in my budget to move out to), much less own a home or condo. I am underpaid and believe that I could get a higher income if I found a different job - but then I would lose my FMLA in case my cancer recurs (which is a very high possibility).
Life is harder than I ever expected it to be. I was prepared to sacrifice, live below my means, and work long hours to get what I wanted. I wasn't prepared to get cancer at 23 and suddenly find that "cutting corners" means I need to cut therapy meant to get me back on my feet after treatment ended because I can't afford the copays or having arguments with my roommate for turning on the heat when it's 60 degrees in the apartment because I can't afford the cost of heating. I've been out of treatment for 4 months and it just gets harder. I'll be paying for the treatment for the next 10 years, but paying emotionally for longer than that.
People think when you have cancer, that you should all be like hawkeye. I find myself under more social pressure to be positive and happy as a cancer survivor than I ever did at any point in my life. People think it's over and done with - they don't realize that I am left in a lifetime of pain (from bone lesions and scar tissue), lung and liver problems, and stress of wondering if that lower back pain is a tumor pressing against my spine again or if the itch I have is a sign of the cancer coming back. More than even having my life, I worry about how I will afford to prolong it. I just wish sometimes that people could try to understand what I go through just to put my work clothes on in the morning rather than glaze it over by telling me that I'm "so brave". I'm not brave. I do what I need to do.
Be thankful for your health and for your children's health. If you have young adult children, do everything in your power to make sure they have health insurance. I've watched my friends in the young adult cancer community suffer through without and no one in the world deserves that kind of stress and misery on top of being seriously ill. If you know a young adult with a serious illness, be there. People stop talking to you when you're in your 20s and have cancer - it reminds people of all ages of their mortality. Take them out for lunch, bring them movies and stupid magazines... just be there. And after it's "over", don't stop being there. It doesn't get easier. If experience tells me anything, the months after treatment are much, much, much harder than treatment ever was.
Sorry that I am so ranty and depressed. During this time of year especially, it's tough that I will be alone for Chanukkah and my birthday because I can't afford to go home. I can't even afford to send my family presents (and am only knitting my boyfriend a scarf because my boss gave me a ton of yarn when she moved). This level of stress is completely unsustainable, but it's almost coming up on 1 year of my diagnosis and the stress has only escalated.
My heart feels for you, but please be positive, as i know you can. When things seem like there is no way out, small miracles do happen.
If people stop talking to you in your twentys when you have cancer, then who needs these people as friends. Friends are there for you always, thru the thick of things. The caretaker deal, should be reported immediately.
Do you know that the best gifts are ones made with love, that a person makes themselves. Has more meaning. Please try and be positive because the stress, can kill you or anyone.
I do not take health for granted, my husband in early fifties, had two heart attacks, and then a 5 bypass, which almost killed me, within a 1 1/2, year period did not think i would get thru all that, but someone i did find strength, found strength, because i needed to take care of the person who has been there and loved me all the years of our married happy life. I sincerely hope you find the strength also. During the second heart attack, a couple months later, i lost my Mother, it was a very hard time in my life, but things are working out good for my husband. I wish with all my heart and soul the same for you.
I am praying, sending luv, and postive vibes your way, you have been thru a lot, but appears, still with a head on your shoulder. I with all my heart sincerely hope that things work out for you, in the best possible way.
Being there for people who need you now, not when it is too late, is what matters most.
Money cannot do that, well it can in a sense, make things more relief, but caring about people, comes from the heart. God Bless You.
Last edited by california-jewel; 12-11-2011 at 03:41 PM..
My heart feels for you, but please be positive, as i know you can. When things seem like there is no way out, small miracles do happen.
I am praying, sending luv, and postive vibes your way, you have been thru a lot, but appears, still with a head on your shoulder. I with all my heart sincerely hope that things work out for you, in the best possible way.
Being there for people who need you now, not when it is too late, is what matters most.
Money cannot do that, well it can in a sense, make things more relief, but caring about people, comes from the heart. God Bless You.
My heart feels for you, but please be positive, as i know you can. When things seem like there is no way out, small miracles do happen.
I am praying, sending luv, and postive vibes your way, you have been thru a lot, but appears, still with a head on your shoulder. I with all my heart sincerely hope that things work out for you, in the best possible way.
Being there for people who need you now, not when it is too late, is what matters most.
Money cannot do that, well it can in a sense, make things more relief, but caring about people, comes from the heart. God Bless You.
How is Foxy?
Been praying for you and yours, my friend.
You need to get you some kinlen (sp? on the phone) and/or starter logs. Fires look nice but they're a drain on the electric bill unless you cut the heat off while burning them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by muleskinner
Next time you unfortunately find yourself in Wallyworld,grab you a case of "Starter Logg" by Pine Mtn....I heat with wood and since I've started using that several years ago,I quit saving newspapers...takes the work completely out of starting a fire.
Thanks for the tips!
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