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Old 01-28-2015, 06:45 PM
 
191 posts, read 485,876 times
Reputation: 144

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I was laid off a couple of weeks ago and then I found out on Monday that I am pregnant (5 weeks). My husband and I are thrilled that we're going to be having a baby because we had been trying for some time but it scares me because well....I do not have a job right now. I have had too many interviews to count on two hands (no offers) so I am not sure how long I will really be out of work for (I have been applying for a lot longer than my unemployment period).

My husband (26) and I (25) have been married for four years, we just started our careers and we do not make much money...with two incomes, we would be able to handle a new addition but I am not sure how we could manage on one income plus a baby. Of course, I do not plan to be unemployed forever but the outlook is pretty bleak so far and I guess I am just trying to mentally prepare myself for the unfortunate circumstance of the latter. Then there's another thought, "I am pregnant, who is going to hire me?" And as I said, I am just starting my career but at this point I am willing to sacrifice it and take a job in a completely different area so that I can provide for my family....and I am not sure if that's wise either because it may be too early to "give up."

The main concern is that I am just really fearful of not being able to provide my child with what they need.

Anyone been in a similar situation? How did it work out for you?
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Old 01-29-2015, 09:29 AM
 
141 posts, read 160,563 times
Reputation: 317
How much is your husband making?

I think you would be surprised to see how basic you can still live and be ok.

Would you be eligible for some governmental help? If your household makes under 36 k, you can apply for wic.

How are you doing on the health insurance front? Could you apply for Medicare? Could the future grandparents help you out?

Congratulations, and don't worry! One of my friends was in your shoes, only more worn out - her husband lost his job as well ,and they made it through it, and hav a happy, healthy little boy now.
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Old 01-29-2015, 09:38 AM
 
Location: sumter
12,970 posts, read 9,659,574 times
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If you just lost your job a few weeks ago, you should be eligible for unemployment benefits. Good luck to you.
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Old 01-29-2015, 09:41 AM
 
483 posts, read 655,430 times
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Also remember that if you do start working you will have to pay for some sort of childcare, which depending on what your job is, could use up your whole paycheck anyway.

You'll be fine. Children need a lot less then you think, just the basic stuff will keep you and baby, happy and safe. Don't be fooled by the giant lists of the hottest new baby gear. Just start shopping around now for high-quality used baby gear(just not car seats) and maybe use your free time to learn how to coupon(there are a ton of great blogs out there for how to get started). I have friends who got into coupons just for things for the baby and they saved a considerable amount. Even saving a little can add up to a lot over time.

Congrats!
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Old 01-29-2015, 09:47 AM
 
45 posts, read 47,659 times
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Keep applying for jobs, I didn't show until I was towards the end of 6th month- well it helped to wear loose fitting stuff. So get a job and start working.... let them know later. They can't fire you for being pregnant. Also, I have a 9 mo old baby boy, it is not as expensive as I thought it would be. Once you get settled, as in have your crib or sleeping arrangement,... all you need after that diapers and food and some toys... babies play with mostly things that are not toys lol like my son loves to go to the kitchen cabinets/drawers. I had empty out the lowest drawer and put stuff in there for him... It will all work out Oh I am sure you will get most of what you need at your baby shower ...
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Old 01-29-2015, 11:50 AM
 
191 posts, read 485,876 times
Reputation: 144
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tacere View Post
How much is your husband making?

I think you would be surprised to see how basic you can still live and be ok.

Would you be eligible for some governmental help? If your household makes under 36 k, you can apply for wic.

How are you doing on the health insurance front? Could you apply for Medicare? Could the future grandparents help you out?

Congratulations, and don't worry! One of my friends was in your shoes, only more worn out - her husband lost his job as well ,and they made it through it, and hav a happy, healthy little boy now.
My husband makes about $38k annually before taxes ($27k after taxes and insurance deductions). I should also be getting unemployment benefits (about $425 a week) so I am not sure how much longer we would be eligible for governmental help. But we will be saving about 75% of that amount just in case.

I am on my husband's insurance plan with his employer. But I started to complete my Medicaid application last night as a secondary insurance but we need to first stop contributing to HSA (because you cannot contribute to HSA and have another insurance plan). We just starting contributing to it as well, there's about $700 in it. I feel like if we stop contributing just to get Medicaid, we are abusing the system though. So another option would be to start contributing more in order to pay the hospital bill.

The only future grandparent that can help is my mom (with daycare). She would be willing to care for little one while we both work during the day.

We have already started to cut cost (phone, cable, car insurance) to prepare for later. And I will look into WIC as well. Thanks for your suggestions. You're right about the basic living needs; I guess I always had this vision of how parenthood "should" be but sometimes everything does not work out like we want it to....and there's a reason why.
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Old 01-29-2015, 12:03 PM
 
191 posts, read 485,876 times
Reputation: 144
Quote:
Originally Posted by HattieB View Post
Keep applying for jobs, I didn't show until I was towards the end of 6th month- well it helped to wear loose fitting stuff. So get a job and start working.... let them know later. They can't fire you for being pregnant. Also, I have a 9 mo old baby boy, it is not as expensive as I thought it would be. Once you get settled, as in have your crib or sleeping arrangement,... all you need after that diapers and food and some toys... babies play with mostly things that are not toys lol like my son loves to go to the kitchen cabinets/drawers. I had empty out the lowest drawer and put stuff in there for him... It will all work out Oh I am sure you will get most of what you need at your baby shower ...
Thanks. When it was time to take off again when you gave birth, was your employer okay with it? How much time did you take off? Your job was not protected under FMLA but did your employer hold your position when you came back?

I think like weddings, people make having a baby like you "need" this and you "need" that but really your baby does not care if you buy the $700 stroller or the less than $100 stroller or the stroller that was given to you by a friend/family member. I think I just need to get out of this mindset of how parenthood should be and we will be okay. But you have really helped me see this as well.
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Old 02-08-2015, 08:50 AM
 
5,652 posts, read 19,353,293 times
Reputation: 4118
yes, the company I worked for lost a big account right before I was to give birth. So I was very obviously pregnant. NO way someone is going to hire me. Also, I had high blood pressure which meant I was supposed to be off my feet as much as possible. I waited til the baby was born. And did interviews after a couple of weeks post partum. Went back to work 5 weeks after he was born.

Nothing I recommend doing, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do I did the breast pump thing, so I did not feel as guilty. I would continue to interview since you are so early into your pregnancy.
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Old 02-08-2015, 11:12 AM
 
894 posts, read 1,050,753 times
Reputation: 2662
I would apply for every government program available. You and your husband worked and paid taxes, so you might as well get the same benefits that those who do nothing are entitled to.

As one of the posters above me stated, you don't need to buy thousand dollar strollers and Gucci onesies. As long as your baby stuff is safe and functional, you'll be fine. Best of luck with your pregnancy!
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Old 02-08-2015, 11:58 AM
 
Location: Raleigh, NC
2,541 posts, read 5,477,486 times
Reputation: 2602
Just wanted to throw out there that it is illegal for a company not to hire you because your pregnant. For that reason, it shouldn't figure into their hiring process at all and you have absolutely no need to tell them you're pregnant at this point.
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