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How did you get to the mindset you have today? What events or observations shaped your views on women?
I think I have a little bitterness towards many women simply because, at least in my view, they tend to have the upper hand when it comes to dating, sex, romance, marriage, etc. The whole courtship process seems to demand that guys take the initiative, that guys make the moves, do the approaching, and do the chasing. And this seems to create a bit of a power imbalance, whereby the female (especially attractive ones) gets to sit back and be the commodity and the guy has to prove himself worthy and capable of meeting the price of that commodity (and pretty women know they are in high demand). And this puts the female in a position of power, and depending on the female's personality and/or morals/ethics, she may abuse her position. Guys crave physical attraction and generally have high sex drives, and most women know this, so it's easy for an attractive female to exploit a guy's hardwiring to her advantage. The less attractive females can't exploit things to the same degree, but they still can; just their pool of potential exploitees is smaller.
But don't get me wrong: I don't hate women. I just hate the advantages women seem to have in the romance/sexual department.
I think I have a little bitterness towards many women simply because, at least in my view, they tend to have the upper hand when it comes to dating, sex, romance, marriage, etc. The whole courtship process seems to demand that guys take the initiative, that guys make the moves, do the approaching, and do the chasing. And this seems to create a bit of a power imbalance, whereby the female (especially attractive ones) gets to sit back and be the commodity and the guy has to prove himself worthy and capable of meeting the price of that commodity (and pretty women know they are in high demand). And this puts the female in a position of power, and depending on the female's personality and/or morals/ethics, she may abuse her position. Guys crave physical attraction and generally have high sex drives, and most women know this, so it's easy for an attractive female to exploit a guy's hardwiring to her advantage. The less attractive females can't exploit things to the same degree, but they still can; just their pool of potential exploitees is smaller.
But don't get me wrong: I don't hate women. I just hate the advantages women seem to have in the romance/sexual department.
Key word: "seem". This is mostly a matter of perception. MANY women don't feel like they have any advantage at all, especially the women who don't get approached, except by bums. You're basing your resentment on a minority of women, the pretty ones. And you're assuming they're "exploiting" what you see as an advantage. Then you extend that to plain and unattractive women, and assume they're exploiting this advantage, too, even though many never get approached by anyone stable and capable of at least supporting themselves. (And btw, even some of the pretty ones don't get approached at all, for various reasons.)
So much of this is in your mind. Do you see how your mind is doing a number on you? In order to resolve this problem, all you have to do is change your mind. Change your focus, and lose the mythology that's upsetting you so.
Last edited by Ruth4Truth; 05-01-2014 at 03:19 PM..
Key word: "seem". This is mostly a matter of perception. MANY women don't feel like they have any advantage at all, especially the women who don't get approached, except by bums. You're basing your resentment on a minority of women, the pretty ones. And you're assuming they're "exploiting" what you see as an advantage. Then you extend that to plain and unattractive women, and assume they're exploiting this advantage, too, even though many never get approached by anyone stable and capable of at least supporting themselves. (And btw, even some of the pretty ones don't get approached at all, for various reasons.)
So much of this is in your mind. Do you see how your mind is doing a number on you? In order to resolve this problem, all you have to do is change your mind. Change your focus, and lose the mythology that's upsetting you so.
This is a bit of what happened to me in my last relationship. I was very much into the guy I was dating and had strong feelings for him. Among other things, he had a hang up about me being good looking (in his opinion) and therefore he was convinced I had a lot of "options" other than him. I didn't, never did and I didn't want others, I only was interested in him. But he was convinced I had or could have many men and he was bitter about it--even called me a liar when I said I didn't have a harem of men chasing me. He never could 100% accept that I was into him and I think it's one of the things that got in the way and why things ended.
He has trouble with relationships with women. I bet a lot of women have "tried" to win him over and run into this brick wall with him. I came close I think. But his own hangups are keeping him single (and he hates it... he's lonely). It's sad to see this self sabotage because otherwise, he's a great guy.
This is a bit of what happened to me in my last relationship. I was very much into the guy I was dating and had strong feelings for him. Among other things, he had a hang up about me being good looking (in his opinion) and therefore he was convinced I had a lot of "options" other than him. I didn't, never did and I didn't want others, I only was interested in him. But he was convinced I had or could have many men and he was bitter about it--even called me a liar when I said I didn't have a harem of men chasing me. He never could 100% accept that I was into him and I think it's one of the things that got in the way and why things ended.
He has trouble with relationships with women. I bet a lot of women have "tried" to win him over and run into this brick wall with him. I came close I think. But his own hangups are keeping him single (and he hates it... he's lonely). It's sad to see this self sabotage because otherwise, he's a great guy.
I wonder why he is this way?
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