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Not sure if something is wrong with me or my emotions just get in the way. I've been trying to move out west for a better career and better year-round weather. During the day while I am being productive I am all for moving, but as soon as I am home at night in my warm bed I start to not want to move anymore until the next day. This continues each day over and over. I do not pay rent at the moment so I am sure that is a factor. I tried to think about how the positive things outweigh the negative. The negative would be having no family out west over 2000 miles away and not having my father's place to fall back on if there was no success on my own. I know that I won't know until I try it.
I really need some input on how to best handle the move and try to prevent my emotions from getting in the way.
Do you have $10,000 saved up for your move, and for the job search when you get out there? Or have you been applying for jobs over the 'net? If not, start there.
What, exactly, has your "trying" consisted of? It sounds like you're inadequately prepared for the move, which is why you're ambivalent about it.
Your feelings are totally normal. My current move was one I made with basically a 2-week notice. I had been applying to tons of federal jobs and then got one. Of course I had been thinking about wanting to move to this area for a while, but the actual process of moving is challenging and nerve-wracking.
The initial part of the move- actually getting out there, getting settled in, meeting people, etc. is the worst part of any move, but once you do it, it can be rewarding. However, thinking about whether going through all of that (especially when it is a huge move like you are considering) is worth it, is very daunting. My sister actually didn’t want to move to where she is now for a good 9-10 years. She thought she’d despise it. She broke up with her now-husband for a while because she just knew in her mind she’d hate it. Ultimately she’s there now and doesn’t even hate it as much as she thought she would. This happened after she moved somewhere she absolutely hated for two years. However, I don’t think she regrets giving that place a try for a couple of years since it helped her focus in on what she really wanted.
Do you have $10,000 saved up for your move, and for the job search when you get out there? Or have you been applying for jobs over the 'net? If not, start there.
What, exactly, has your "trying" consisted of? It sounds like you're inadequately prepared for the move, which is why you're ambivalent about it.
I have been there twice and both times I apply for work and look for roommates before going there. Each time when I got there for jobs , they did not follow up with me like they said they would until after I returned home and the roommates I contacted changed their plans or didn't reply. I had a little over 8,000 saved the first time I went.
It was hard to leave friends and my dad with him being in tears each time before I left so I kept thinking about that in the back of my mind when I wasn't busy. That was part of what made me return home so I think those bad experiences makes me iffy about trying again.
I have been there twice and both times I apply for work and look for roommates before going there. Each time when I got there for jobs , they did not follow up with me like they said they would until after I returned home and the roommates I contacted changed their plans or didn't reply. I had a little over 8,000 saved the first time I went.
It was hard to leave friends and my dad with him being in tears each time before I left so I kept thinking about that in the back of my mind when I wasn't busy. That was part of what made me return home so I think those bad experiences makes me iffy about trying again.
You're trying to relocate to phoenix, correct? Employers don't want or need to hire people who don't live there already. Unless, maybe, you have a particularly valuable, unusual skill and/or education.
Same goes for folks looking for roommates. They need your money to pay the rent or mortgage. Leaving the room open while you get your *stuff* together and actually move isn't going to help them pay the bills. Offer to start paying rent immediately, like before you move, and they would probably jump at having you as a roommate.
I suspect the same things are true in most cities.
I have been there twice and both times I apply for work and look for roommates before going there. Each time when I got there for jobs , they did not follow up with me like they said they would until after I returned home and the roommates I contacted changed their plans or didn't reply. I had a little over 8,000 saved the first time I went.
It was hard to leave friends and my dad with him being in tears each time before I left so I kept thinking about that in the back of my mind when I wasn't busy. That was part of what made me return home so I think those bad experiences makes me iffy about trying again.
You applied for jobs from home, got some interest form employers, flew out there, presumably for interviews, but they didn't see you? They didn't schedule you until after you'd returned home? I'm not sure I follow. Could you explain? Did you not have interviews scheduled before flying out there? How did you respond, when they finally followed up (after you'd returned home)?
On the positive side, at least you're getting interest from employers there. That's something. You'll probably have to take the plunge, and just move there, and pay the first few months' rent out of savings. Or else, secure interview appointments written in stone, before you fly out....?
Not sure if something is wrong with me or my emotions just get in the way. I've been trying to move out west for a better career and better year-round weather. During the day while I am being productive I am all for moving, but as soon as I am home at night in my warm bed I start to not want to move anymore until the next day. This continues each day over and over. I do not pay rent at the moment so I am sure that is a factor. I tried to think about how the positive things outweigh the negative. The negative would be having no family out west over 2000 miles away and not having my father's place to fall back on if there was no success on my own. I know that I won't know until I try it.
I really need some input on how to best handle the move and try to prevent my emotions from getting in the way.
Your concerns are legitimate. You currently have family closeby and you are not paying rent. That is HUGE. Rents are very costly. Even with a roommate, you will need a larger apartment, so really it is a wash.
Look up the median rentals in the county you want to move to (huduser.org/data sets/fair market rents). Unless you have AT LEAST 6 months of living expenses saved up, I would stay rent-free where you are. Unless you are truly unhappy, but it does not really sound like that.
I admire your brave spirit, but don't let emotions cloud the math.
To Riley, I just turned 30 in October. I know I should have been on my own by current standards, but after my parents split up when I was 16, my dad and I have been each others crutch and support , really close with my dad.
I didn't schedule interviews for a specific day because I wasn't sure when I would be there, so they said to cal when I got in town. I called a few after that fact, but they said the employer moved onto other applicants.
I am just going to go there and get a temporary room until I find stable work (I am an Uber driver so that will help with income in the mean time).
To Riley, I just turned 30 in October. I know I should have been on my own by current standards, but after my parents split up when I was 16, my dad and I have been each others crutch and support , really close with my dad.
I didn't schedule interviews for a specific day because I wasn't sure when I would be there, so they said to cal when I got in town. I called a few after that fact, but they said the employer moved onto other applicants.
I am just going to go there and get a temporary room until I find stable work (I am an Uber driver so that will help with income in the mean time).
They said they'd moved on to other applicants, but called you after you'd returned home?
Couldn't you have told them, you'd call them back to make an appointment, after you make your travel arrangements, and then set up interview dates with them, before leaving home?
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