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Are people consciously aware of their stinginess or is it generally a subconscious action?
The stingiest person I ever knew, was fully aware of what he was doing and made it a part of both his personal and his business policy. He always gave as little as possible and took as much as he could. He was my boss for six months and I learned some lessons about what the rewards were for being a Scrooge.
He ended up losing many customers who were charged high prices, when other companies were recognizing the need to be more competitive and the business failed. But he made sure to squeeze all the assets out of it for himself that he could. His partner, who was his 22 year younger brother, was left holding an empty bag. But he was left with no friends and his family rejected him for his greediness and lack of concern for them.
He had hired a bunch of new people, hoping to expand his business, but when that didn't work, he laid them off, just a few days before they would have been eligible for unemployment benefits. Just one day before giving them notice, he had been leading pep-talks about what a great future the business had and how they would also prosper, by working for it.
Stinginess is highly variable and subjective. I've seen some called stingy who were very frugal and wise. I've seen some others called spend-happy and wasteful, who actually did a lot of good and usefulness with their money. People will complain no matter what.
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So one Valentines Day, on a lark, I did delivery for a local florist.
What an education.
The less disposable income a person apparently had, the more lavish the bouquet.
I delivered a huge teddy bear, chocolates and a dozen roses to a girl in a very run down duplex. I delivered a singleton red rose bouquet with baby's breath to an upscale downtown office, and everything in between.
The whole day the florist was extremely busy, and was grumbling about stingy people. Really? I felt bad for the girl who got the $250 monstrous teddy bear assembly because she could have done a lot with that $250. There was a man who called in the afternoon and asked if she could deliver a bouquet with an apology that it was supposed to go out in the morning but the delivery van had troubles. She was furious, no way was she going to make up for his forgetfulness. Hell yeah, do it, and charge him $50 for the effort. ;D
...definitely the later, and very conscious of it....never went to college, sent four kids through college with no student loans, retired from the dreaded private sector at 55 and moved to hawai'i, livin' the dream....being stingy ain't a bad thing...
Quote:
Originally Posted by ClaraC
I would call that "frugal" or "careful".
Stingy, in my opinion, has a decidedly negative connotation.
I think it is a combination. Without being stingy, frugal, and money conscious, he would not have been able to achieve what he has.
Being stiny doesn't necessarily mean you don't pay your own share. It just means you don't give stuff away for free or are generous. I think most people who are stingy are frugal, but it is not quite the same.
I see myself as stingy and I would say lot of it is subconscious. But I go out of my way not to be stingy with other people.
I am stingy in my personal life like I should throw away the thsirt with hole on it but I still keep it because I feel like I can get few more use out of it, next thing I know I have it for years and the hole keeps getting bigger. One day I stop myself and ask, it only cost $5 to buy a tshirt, WTH are you doing. I get motivated and embarrassed at my stingy self and finally throw it away. Or I am planning a vacation and looking for the cheapest option then my husband comes and points out if I paid $20 (or whatever it is) more, I can have soo much better experience. In reality that extra money is totally worth it but my natural instinct is to "wing it" with the cheapest option.
I think it is a combination. Without being stingy, frugal, and money conscious, he would not have been able to achieve what he has.
Being stiny doesn't necessarily mean you don't pay your own share. It just means you don't give stuff away for free or are generous. I think most people who are stingy are frugal, but it is not quite the same.
Giving something to another to me, is a gift to me....we both win.
Maybe too, the longer one lives on this earth the more they see the insignificance to STUFF...and money comes and goes...it's green paper with pictures of presidents.
At least I do have a generous daughter so the genes are there...
Let's see. Met humans that would rather drink hydrochloric acid then utter words of encouragement. That to me is a stingy character trait.
Or stingy in 'selective deeds. You know....that guy who will help a babe who is struggling to carry that feather in one hand and purse in the other. He will rush up to help her....then slam the door behind him when aunt Ethel comes along with an arm load of groceries. He figures that 'oldbag' serves him no purpose.
Most frugal folks I can admire...sensible in many ways. But stingy traits do tend to favor the person's small world they reside in.
Giving something to another to me, is a gift to me....we both win.
Maybe too, the longer one lives on this earth the more they see the insignificance to STUFF...and money comes and goes...it's green paper with pictures of presidents.
At least I do have a generous daughter so the genes are there...
Oh, I sometimes do give generous gifts to people I love. And have given a nice sweater to a homeless guy on my corner recently. He was so high, he thought I attack him so I just threw it at him
But I am too stingy to sell my old clothes for a few bucks at a yard sale. I rather wear them until they are unwearable.
I am too stingy to send my mom flowers for $150 on mothers day, I think she is just as happy about a $30 arrangement. I am too stingy to order a cocktail in a bar, I go with cheap beer. My cell phone is almost falling apart and I never have a good connection because I refuse to pay $$$$ for a freaking phone and good service. I am too cheap to pay for water if I can shower for free at the gym after workouts. A few years ago I went on vacation with my parents and we shared a room because we were too cheap to pay for two.
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