People who surround themselves with "ugly" (safe) people (mentally, attractive)

[OzzyRules]

I put that word in quotes because some might get a different impression from my title. But have you ever wondered why a person would choose to have so many "ugly" friends and people their lives?

I'm not judging people who are fat or non-traditional looking, or doing anything like that. Some of them might be endowed physically or blessed with good features. I'm referring to the facial expressions. You can tell a lot about people's personalities from their photos. Some of them look almost mentally "sick" and you wonder why they would want to be around so many people like that.

I think I'm pretty average, personally. But I think I get along with most people on some level. I try to accept all kinds of people. Such as the people I come into contact with every day. And I think that we should try to get along with everyone.

But there are always certain people who try to play it so "safe" that they only want to surround themselves with safe people too. Maybe they attend certain kinds of churches and feel "safe" around the people there. They may even be in artistic circles in certain religious communities. But their communities tend to reinforce their fears and beliefs. I feel sorry for these people. If you look at the people in their circles and gatherings it looks like everyone is really "uptight" or something. They might have certain good qualities, like in some ways they may be very respectful and old-fashioned. But then, as a result, it's like the women would always wear long dresses. Like Karen Carpenter. Not always, I'm exaggerating. But it's just kind of out of place in today's world.

But I worry about them never being happy because they are so scared to break out of that traditional shell. I also feel like they tend to be more superstitious and not very trusting. It's not as if they don't have the potential to blossom into something more beautiful. But they just would prefer to keep building or reinforcing their psychological walls. And it just makes them look ugly when they have the potential to be beautiful.

This is hard to describe. Can anyone relate to what I'm saying?

[ClaraC]

I liked your title, but honestly, I can't tell what you're saying in your post.

[OzzyRules]

Originally Posted by ClaraC

I liked your title, but honestly, I can't tell what you're saying in your post.

I'm referring to uptight people. Which could even include people in non-traditional circles, such as an artistic religious community.

[zentropa]

Still not following you.

[OzzyRules]

Originally Posted by zentropa

Still not following you.

Uptight. Play it safe. Traditional. Conservative roles. Churchy.

[BirdieBelle]

Originally Posted by OzzyRules

Uptight. Play it safe. Traditional. Conservative roles. Churchy.

It really reads like you’re judging people from photos of them, which is not a good idea.

[ClaraC]

I'm sorry, I truly am trying to follow you, but I've never encountered "an artistic religious community".

Also, people dressed traditionally don't look ugly to me.

In fact, "churchy" people in my world are much more inclined to be physically attractive and put together, with their clothing and hair and makeup etc.

[zentropa]

Are you saying that religious people are ugly in photos?

[LLCNYC]

Me thinks you worry wayyyyy toooo much about other people.

This is your one life. It ain't a dress rehearsal. Stop looking, worrying, analyzing other people.

[InchingWest]

I have an amazing circle of friends, some of whom are fairly attractive in appearance, and others who have trouble attracting mates with looks alone. Sad to say that's the reality of the situation as everyone seems to have an excellent personality, demeanor, intelligence, whit, etc.

Really, I didn't choose my friends because of their looks although a couple have been mates in the past and they've stuck with the group, or were already there before. The important parameters are your hobbies and whether or not you all get along. I'm thankful that I have a relatively low-drama group and no one really cares about other people's looks although a couple individuals (both a guy and a girl) judge themselves rather harshly.