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I'm reaching out to all of you for ideas of what my wife and I can do with two child family members coming for a week long visit from Tucson, AZ. My wife and I live alone in Raleigh, and are in our 40's. We are a bit stressed out by this visit, because while the children in question are not problem-children in any sense, they are a bit ... difficult. They are difficult because they don't seem to enjoy much of anything. He is 12, and could lovingly be described as nerdy. In Arizona, he spends almost all of his time (outside of school) on his phone playing games. She just turned 17, has a boyfriend, is running a fledgling business, and spends all of her time when she's at home on her phone making videos and being on social media.
Here's the thing, kids like my wife and I. Kids of all ages enjoy being with us. We can be fun, and do things that they like, but ... these kids, and I really really do love them, are different. They haven't been exposed to much in life. They live a very sheltered existence, and are comfortable only with the routine they are accustomed to. EVEN FOOD IS GOING TO BE DIFFICULT!!! They learned terrible eating habits from their mom and grandmother. Their preferred menu consists of three, maybe four or five things, so going out to eat is NOT an activity we can count on. They care less about nature and being outside than a dog cares about politics, so outdoor activities don't excite them.
The science museum might be an option for the boy, but the girl might pass out from boredom. She might like the art museum, but then he'll be bored. Marbles kid's museum is supposed to be geared to kids up to 10, so that probably is not a good option for him, and definitely not for her. Go karts are fun, right!?! Not for these kids Honestly, the only thing that I can think of that will entertain them is going to the movie theater, and the girl getting her nails done. Other than that, we'd just have to buy them stuff to make them happy. We can have conversations with the boy which is nice, but she is a woman of VERY few words.
Again, we really can entertain most kids. We can have a good time doing almost anything with most kids, but I think we might be screwed with these two. HELP!
By the way, they are coming for the week of October 7th.
bottom line: that is a Long Time Away from now in teenage-time.
a whole lot of things could and probably will change by then.
however:
let us assume absolutely nothing about them or you changes.
here are our three ideas:
1. "...what my wife and I can do with..." nothing. get out of the way.
2. ask them about what they are doing online. find out what what video game is the best.
how lighting would change the impact of her videos.
3. do you have any pets? so far, every child i have met relates to pets.
I took my teenage granddaughters, 13 & 15, and their brother (7) to the beach for the night/weekend. Carolina Beach is cool, has a small amusement park (in the summer), small boardwalk area, good eats. Pack a cooler with drinks, snacks, etc. Five & Below sells 5 dollar boogie boards....go and have fun! Mine had a blast and put their phones down for awhile.
PS...Right down the road there is an aquarium at Fort Fisher and the ferry going to Southport...more fun stuff!
PSS...Just noticed this was for Oct...okay, so you're limited with colder temps, but its still fun in that area with cheaper rates, sales at the tourist shops, and you can still get a good beach day in October.
I took my teenage granddaughters, 13 & 15, and their brother (7) to the beach for the night/weekend. Carolina Beach is cool, has a small amusement park (in the summer), small boardwalk area, good eats. Pack a cooler with drinks, snacks, etc. Five & Below sells 5 dollar boogie boards....go and have fun! Mine had a blast and put their phones down for awhile.
PS...Right down the road there is an aquarium at Fort Fisher and the ferry going to Southport...more fun stuff!
PSS...Just noticed this was for Oct...okay, so you're limited with colder temps, but its still fun in that area with cheaper rates, sales at the tourist shops, and you can still get a good beach day in October.
Have had some good trips to north myrtle in October back when we had year round track 4. Water is still in 80s. Rooms are cheap. Crowds are slim. Find a couple of days where air temps are in 80s and you can still ocean swim.
Bowling, movies, NCMA will have the Frida Kahlo exhibit, state fair is a good call. I was going to suggest the Durham Bulls, but you’ll miss the season.
I like the idea of walking on a college campus for the 17-year old. If she's into social media, she may want some "cool" backdrops to take pictures at. Franklin Street in Chapel Hill would be fun for her. I think an overnight trip to the beach would be fun for kids from Phoenix. Myrtle would probably be a good choice since there's a lot to do there in addition to the beach itself.
Are their parents coming too? Do these kids have manners? Honestly all kids these ages can be difficult in ways you describe. It’s the parents job to manage that - so if you can’t even go out to eat they should be embarrassed (and I have two VERY picky eaters). If the parents are gonna be there let them manage the expectations they’ve created. Offer activities and leave it to them to take the heat of their offspring. If the parents aren’t gonna be there ...well I’m not sure the purpose of the visit LOL. But these kids might surprise you if they’ve never been out if AZ before maybe they are bored and ready for something different - michgc has good ideas. Maybe you can arrange a tour of Epic Games in Cary. That would make you a god to the boy.
bottom line: that is a Long Time Away from now in teenage-time.
a whole lot of things could and probably will change by then.
however:
let us assume absolutely nothing about them or you changes.
here are our three ideas:
1. "...what my wife and I can do with..." nothing. get out of the way.
2. ask them about what they are doing online. find out what what video game is the best.
how lighting would change the impact of her videos.
3. do you have any pets? so far, every child i have met relates to pets.
Thanks for the response, Turkey.
1. "Nothing. Get out of the way". While I understand the point I think you are trying to make, I don't want them to come over and spend their entire time sitting on a couch or in the guest room glued to their phones. If they enjoyed things like skateboarding, biking, soccer, being in the woods, walking in shopping malls, etc, then I'd feel better about getting "out of the way", but these two literally do NOTHING.
Also, I would like to have a more interactive time with them while they are here. I want them to go back with good memories, and maybe be exposed to some different things than they are used to. Having them come and do their usual would be easy, but I am hoping for more. These kids have low self esteems. I hate that. It's one of the main reasons that they don't do much in life. It's only a visit, but I want more for them, and if they can have a taste of something different, then I think that would be a good thing.
2. Sure, I can talk to him about the video games he plays, and even play with him. I just don't want that to be the primary activity that we share. Talking to the girl about lighting ... yep, that's an idea, and something I know about.
3. Pets. Every normal child I know also relates to pets. Not these ones. Their mother and grandmother are NOT pet people. They are the type of people who do not like animals, and are of the opinion that if you must have a pet, then it should be isolated outside, and have as little interaction with humans as possible. My wife and I are the complete opposite. These kids don't dislike animals. They are simply indifferent to their existence.
We have 4 dogs. We love animals. They are a huge part of our lives. Maybe our furry friends, and the way we interact with them can help set these kids on a different way of seeing animals. More than likely, though, they will be bombarded with question when they get home like, "How bad did the house stink? How about their cars? Was there fur everywhere? etc ... " We'll see.
Would the 17-year-old like to look at college boys (or girls)? Walk around a campus or two so she can instagram the place?
The State Fair starts in mid-October and that could be fun.
Thanks for the suggestion, 919! The college campus idea sounds like a great idea. I think this will definitely be on our list!
Unfortunately, I think they will be here and gone before the fair starts. If not, we will go for sure!
Thanks again!
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Honestly, the only thing that I can think of that will entertain them is going to the movie theater, and the girl getting her nails done. Other than that, we'd just have to buy them stuff to make them happy. We can have conversations with the boy which is nice, but she is a woman of VERY few words.
