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If you truly love them, then they should have priority oner anything else in your life.
That said, the same should go the other way.
How your actions affect your partner should be your first consideration.
If the marriage is ever to be a success, then you will need to be fluent in the language of compromise. If you can't work together for the common goal, then you are doomed.
I believe should that situation arise in my current relationship, we would discuss it fully, and reach a mutually agreeable conclusion.
We both may need to adjust our plans slightly, or one of us may feel the other has a stronger case to argue, and adjust our aims to suit.
I can't help but notice that you have "Islam" featuring strongly in your username. Are there any specific requirements in your religion which would require you to relinquish some independence ?
I am aware that in some cultures, the role of women is much different.
Oh you are a man and I am a woman ! dont know if that might make any difference !
I'm a woman and I don't see why I would ever be put in a situation where I had to make that choice. There's no reason a person can't be married and be going to school or working at the same time - and if I was with someone who forced me to choose, it would be an easy choice because I would never spend my life with someone who put me in that situation.
Quote:
but I actually did the same thing as you suggested ! the guy said he can afford all I may need but I couldnt give up further sudies and work !I felt like there would come a day sooner or later when I shall see him as the one who stole my dreams and killed my ambitions and my father told me that I am free to accept and to follow my heart but he said that his wider experience and riper wisdom taught him that the head is over the heart ! hope I shall not regret it !
Peace and love ! Salam
I'm glad you made the choice you did and I don't think you'll regret it.
Many women get married, but still study, get educated, and have great careers. Why would you have to stop studying simply because you get married?
Exactly !
I am 20 and I have been so far the best student in my promotion at university and I will have the chance to study abroad , I mean to further my studes ( the university shall give me a scholarship to study in USA )
and I cant give this up !
I think I shall manage both !
Thanks for sharing your view !
God bless you
I'm a woman and I don't see why I would ever be put in a situation where I had to make that choice. There's no reason a person can't be married and be going to school or working at the same time - and if I was with someone who forced me to choose, it would be an easy choice because I would never spend my life with someone who put me in that situation.
I'm glad you made the choice you did and I don't think you'll regret it.
Thanks sister for your supporting words !
Well the guy didnt force me at all !
He said he can afford all I may need !
But as you said I think that my studies and work will help both of usespecially in this age where life is getting more and more expensive !
God bless you sister !
If you truly love them, then they should have priority oner anything else in your life.
I should admit thats true !
That said, the same should go the other way.
How your actions affect your partner should be your first consideration.
Certainly !
If the marriage is ever to be a success, then you will need to be fluent in the language of compromise. If you can't work together for the common goal, then you are doomed.
Yeah I fully agree with you !
I believe should that situation arise in my current relationship, we would discuss it fully, and reach a mutually agreeable conclusion.
We both may need to adjust our plans slightly, or one of us may feel the other has a stronger case to argue, and adjust our aims to suit.
Well the guy s intention is so good !
He said he can afford all and there is no need for me to tire myself
and he wants me to devote all my time for him and our future kids !
But I still want to be productive in society ! and honestly to help my parents who did all for me to study , I think it would be ungrateful not to give them anything back after all they sacrificed for my sake !
I can't help but notice that you have "Islam" featuring strongly in your username. Are there any specific requirements in your religion which would require you to relinquish some independence ?
I am aware that in some cultures, the role of women is much different.
Yeah I am Muslim , but Islam doesnt oblige women to stop studying or not to work !
History bears witness that there were many muslim women who were successfull as mothers and wives and who were at the same time scholars even !
In my religion , marriage is not legal if the woman is forced to accept !
And that guy didnt force me to accept his conditions !
We discussed and he said he would be happy if I accepted .
Yeah we as , Arabs have a culture different from that of Europeans or Americans !
Some women have a tendency to stay at home after marriage but not all of them !
I appreciate so much your post and respect your opinion !
Thanks for taking the pain of answering my question !
God bless you
I'd rather get 32 root canals without Novocaine then to get married again.
Oh I can see that you had a bad experience , n your marriage was not successful !
Oh I always tell my family and friends that if ever my marriage turned to be a failure I would be mad !
Why wont you give it another try ?
Are you afraid of failing again?
Best
wishes !
God bless you !
Many thanks to all of you for answering my question and sharing your views !
May God bless all of you !
Best regards !
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