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Well what would you say when couples decide to stay together for their children.
As couples, they dont like being together, stopped liking each others company. When they are together, they wud just argue, so they stop talking other then imp. stuff related to kids.
Nope, not at all. As a matter of fact, it's more negative then positive to stay together because of the kids. No matter how old the kids are, they can sense the hate, dislike or anger from the tension between the parents.
For all involved, it's such a relief when the parents go their own way and stop living together.
what if one of the child has autism. And I feel like if for some reason I dont get his custody after seperating, noone would ever take good care of him.
I can do anything for my children
Are you the father? If one of the children is autistic, see if the mother will take custody of the other children while you get custody of the autistic child. That way, you can have control on how best to care for your autistic child.
Also, I would go to a family lawyer and see if they can help you with custody of the one child or all the children. Lawyers used to have free 30 minute consultations.
no. as a young person i can tell you that id rather come from 2 seperate & happy homes than 1 house where my parents are together but they really arent happy at all. even if you shelter your kids from the arguments & try your best to have everything seem okay, kids can sense that somethings wrong. the keywords of your post are ' still married JUST for the kids '....once the chlid figures out [and they WILL] that momma & daddy are only staying together because of them, they will feel guilty. they dont see it as 'momma & daddy are staying together so i dont have to go through a divorce, custody arrangements, ect' they see it as them holding you back from your happiness. kids tend to put guilt on themselves a lot...i cant say for SURE that will happen in your case, but i know how my friends felt when they realized this after their parents finally decided to divorce. hope everything works out for you.
what if one of the child has autism. And I feel like if for some reason I dont get his custody after seperating, noone would ever take good care of him.
I can do anything for my children
Agree with donie1 on all points.
I divorced my husband, and we have an autistic son. Believe me, what he was witnessing was devastating to him. He still has nightmares.
If you feel the other parent is unfit, or won't keep the child's best interests as priority, fight for custody of that child! It's so important; can't stress that enough. Get your lawyer involved. Won't be a fun process, but it's something that you've gotta do.
I have been divorced for about 14 years now. Although I do not have a special needs child, I think it is better for the kids to divorce under the conditions you describe. Fighting is harmful to children, No matter how hard you try to hide it or keep it quiet, they always know. For as long I as I live I will never forget what my then 8 year old said when my ex and I told him we were divorcing...."Thank goodness."
All these years later I am still glad I divorced. I have been able to go on with my life, remarry, have another child and bring happiness and a stable homelife to my oldest two. They are both wonderful adults. That's not to say they are perfect or that life has always been perfect for them. Graduations, birthdays and Christmas have always been a little awkward. I suppose weddings will be worse. All in all though they have not had to deal with constant fighting, hatred or animosity between their parents in the home. Our homelife is happy and a safe place for them, as it should be.
My question is this: If you get custody of your child, won't the other parent have a right to be alone with that child some of the time?
We don't have an autistic child but that doesn't change the fact that all children should be raised in a healthy environment. It is the responsibility of both parents to provide it and not blame each other for not doing so.
Well what would you say when couples decide to stay together for their children.
As couples, they dont like being together, stopped liking each others company. When they are together, they wud just argue, so they stop talking other then imp. stuff related to kids.
Is this healthy?
I come from a family where my parents stayed together for the kids until we were grown and it was fine. No major fighting, Dad did his thing Mom did hers. They were more like siblings. We would do all the standard family stuff together. Had money to buy what we needed and extras. Mom was always waiting when we came home from school. Yes it was just like most of the married couples out there today that don'! get a divorce. I think this situation is very common.
Now if there excessive arguing or abuse No!
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sorry for half info
