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I am really confused about this and I think it's one of my downfalls. Recently I did a 4 day trek here in Perú and in our group were a group of very attractive Belgian girls. One of the Belgian girls was quite friendly with me but for the life of me I didn't sense anything flirtatious at all. Much later, when the tour was almost done, another guy in the group who is from Holland and speaks Dutch/Flemish told me that he overheard the girl saying to her friend (in Dutch) that she thought I was very attractive and she was trying to talk to me and I was not making any advances and it was frustrating her.
WTF? Either I am absolutely dumb to these things, which explains my singleness lately or figuring out women IS actually rocket science!!!! How exactly do I differentiate between a woman just being friendly and a woman who is acting interested? This is confusing because some women actually have boyfriends but compliment me and act like they are flirting...but they are not being serious because they tell me they have a BF.
I am an Engineer by profession and I think I just see things in a very straightforward way...if a woman likes me she will SAY so or do something very obvious that will indicate to me that she likes me...but I am thinking this game doesn't work this way...LOL!
2 things. The first may seem like I'm putting you down (I'm not) but as an Engineer you do have a different personality that women can't figure out. Yes indeed Ann Landers did a nationwide survey to determine the most boring people and by a very long shot, Engineers won the most boring people. That said I have several friends who are Engineers who are not boring. My closest friend and dance competition mentor is an Engineer and that helps in choreographing routines.
Secondly, join the club man. Since the beginning of time we have not been able to figure out women. And when you're talking women from different cultures an impossible task becomes hard as Chinese math !
If a woman likes you, she may be very forward about it (flirt in an obvious way) or she may be very friendly and kind of test the waters to see how you respond. Neither sex wants to throw themselves at a person and be rejected. So it's typical to start small and see how that's received, see if the other person will up the ante. Typically, males tend to be the pursuers and females, the pursued. So if she's projecting openness to the idea and you don't make an effort to pursue, she'll get the idea you aren't interested. Yes, this may require you (as the male) to be rejected more than most women. It kind of comes with the territory. Men got stuck with that one, mostly. Women got stuck with childbirth. It is what it is. Next time, if she's cute, ask her out! The worst someone can say is "no."
2 things. The first may seem like I'm putting you down (I'm not) but as an Engineer you do have a different personality that women can't figure out. Yes indeed Ann Landers did a nationwide survey to determine the most boring people and by a very long shot, Engineers won the most boring people. That said I have several friends who are Engineers who are not boring. My closest friend and dance competition mentor is an Engineer and that helps in choreographing routines.
Secondly, join the club man. Since the beginning of time we have not been able to figure out women. And when you're talking women from different cultures an impossible task becomes hard as Chinese math !
I don't know about Ann Landers but in my experience, the densest men to communicate with in a relationship are computer system engineers.
Yes...it has been said that women are hard to figure out. Not so!!! I say, just look into her eyes and understand things that are not expressed with words. As a rule, women are the most afraid of rejection, so they express what they want with eye contact. The one advantage we have over men is that, we have "intuition."
I don't think anyone can generalize about a whole profession. I have met engineers...civil, electrical, mechanical, materials, industrial...who were all different. People say some weird stuff on this site.
Women are easy. As a man she was waiting for you to be the first one to indicate your interest in her. You could have done this in a flirty, light-hearted way and had your answer. By waiting for her to be the pursuer, you lost out. Better luck next time!
I am an Engineer by profession and I think I just see things in a very straightforward way...if a woman likes me she will SAY so or do something very obvious that will indicate to me that she likes me...but I am thinking this game doesn't work this way...LOL!
You're looking for direct expressions of interest.
Most people are indirect when they are wooing someone they're interested in and don't know.
She's from another culture, as you are.
You both see the world through different eyes. Not to mention you're an engineer which speaks volumes to me because your mind is wired differently to begin with.
I know because I married an engineer and when he wooed me he was VERY direct with his approach.
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Either I am absolutely dumb to these things, which explains my singleness lately or figuring out women IS actually rocket science!!!! How exactly do I differentiate between a woman just being friendly and a woman who is acting interested? This is confusing because some women actually have boyfriends but compliment me and act like they are flirting...but they are not being serious because they tell me they have a BF.
