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An important part of my sex life is that my man be able to satisfy me. I won't lie, it would be a turn off if we are both not up in age and he is using Viagra, penis pumps, and and any other male enhancement techniques. It just doesn't interest me at all
An important part of my sex life is that my man be able to satisfy me. I won't lie, it would be a turn off if we are both not up in age and he is using Viagra, penis pumps, and and any other male enhancement techniques. It just doesn't interest me at all
I read a study that had good credentials that said a woman's interest in sex with a particular partner diminished with the length of the relationship. But she could still be very interested and active with a new partner. The newness is the clue.
Supposedly women, if there were no societal taboos, would have their most active sex lives in a series of monogamous relationships.
I don't know what a guy with ED could do with that information, though, but thought it might be something to consider. I guess if he could keep a relationship with a woman long enough it would end up not being much of an issue.
Let's say you meet a really nice guy--he's caring, loving, kind, mature, and is reasonably successful in his career. Two months go by, and you're dating exclusively. You can see this leading to marriage. Then he tells you he has erectile dysfunction, and has had it for quite a while.
How would you handle this? Would you continue in the relationship?
I am 54.
I think marriage after only dating for two months is more troublesome.
That being said, at whatever point in our relationship, I would still stick around. I don't want a man for his penis only.
People these days tend to toss out what isn't perfect, isn't instantly gratifying, isn't convenient. It seems that if there is any sort of effort involved, folks don't want any part of it. We treat each other as if we are disposable.
Maybe we should stop living so long. People valued life when our life expectancy was 40 years.
I read a study that had good credentials that said a woman's interest in sex with a particular partner diminished with the length of the relationship. But she could still be very interested and active with a new partner. The newness is the clue.
Supposedly women, if there were no societal taboos, would have their most active sex lives in a series of monogamous relationships.
This really isn't gender specific, there are studies that have shown what is called the coolidge effect can occur in both men and women, but it does occur most often in men i believe. the coolidge effect indicates that sexual interest sparks/re-ignites whenever a new partner is available, and wanes as comfort and familiarity grows. (makes you think about the societal creation of the insitution of marriage, huh?)
apparently the coolidge effect has something to do with the effects of dopamine neurotransmitters, but i think anyone with an active sexual life has probably seen this effect in themselves in one form or another. in fact, the coolidge effect is now being recognized in the novelty and frequency use of pornography, in addition to attributing it to the increase in more erotic (or deviate) interest in various types of porn. in other words, the user need newer or greater levels of visual stimuli than before to obtain an orgasm and sexual satisfaction.
the frequent consumption of porn is also being discussed as the basis for some men not obtaining an erection or orgasm IRL without the use of porn (and ED meds) because real sex is no longer visually stimulating at the level. and from what i read, there has recently been a substantial increase in younger men having ED, an anamoly not seen before the widespread availability and use of internet porn on high-speed band width. some have even speculated that frequent porn use is causing other social, dating and relationship problems like protracted virginity in men, creating fear of approaching women (not enough desire to overcome fear, particularly with porn readily avialable at home), impacting intimacy in dating and bf-gf sexual relationships, and affecting "sexless" marriages and leading to emotional affairs.
yes, that may be a lot to blame on porn but it's not porn, it's fundamentally self control of sexual desires involving self-stimulation. because if you keep getting your dopamine fix that way, it diminishes your incentive to get it elsewhere, particularly if it is not as arousing. there are also a couple of studies indicating a 7-day recharge cycle for testosterome, meaning to go from orgasm to fully loaded it takes about 7 days. so if men are getting pops with porn/masterbaton everyday, they keep their testosterome tank running on empty, or fumes lol. anyway, anecdotal reports also suggest that temporary abstinence (6mos-2yrs) seems to reverse the negative symptoms, as if being waned off a drug addiction. and from what i understand, one of those subtle negative symptoms is the deminished time and energy it causes, i.e., abstinence often results in men being more productive in their personal and professional lives. (perhaps affecting interest in looking for a job by unemployed/failure to launch gen???)
interesting stuff huh? google "brain on porn" or rebalance brain for more info.
hope this info helps some, it is certainly worthy of experimenting with, at least is was for me. the idea also prompted me to look in other personal habits that suck time and energy, such as use of tv, internet, alcohol, certain foods, toxic friends, etc. life is too short to blow it on bad habits and unhealthy lifestyles, ... well at least during weekdays lol
p.s.: i've discovered that the best way to implement this porn/masterbation abstinence practice is to.... "keep it real" haha (save your orgasm for the real deal, not visual stimulation or fantasy). c'mon, most adult men have consumed enough porn for the remainder of their life, you know it will alway be available, and self-discipline is fundamentally a valued masculine charater trait.
Last edited by Dr. Clean; 10-03-2014 at 06:58 PM..
If he already has "Ed"... He's probably not interested in dating me, ( a girl) besides... I am not into threesomes.
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