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If you and your wife have children together then you need to think about the recourse of contacting the girlfriend. It's possible the girlfriend will get violent with your wife. While I don't condone cheating, I would never want to put a child's parent in harms way.
Contact an attorney and get yourself in counseling. The attorney can help you deal with the legal matters and the counselor can help you deal with the betrayal and anger. Holding on to anger is only going to hurt you in the long run. So the sooner you can work through this the better off you are going to be.
I'm sorry this happened to you. And I hope you can find some peace within your life.
Take the advice of others and don't contact the other woman. Nothing good can come of it. Focus your energy on yourself and your family now.
Sorry you're dealing with this!
I wouldn't recommend contacting her, but if you do, do it anonymously.
If you know her name, chances are she owns some property that is in the publicly-accessible property tax databases for all of the counties around here. For example, search for William Bell in the Durham and you'll see that the mayor (William V "Bill" Bell) owns a house at 1003 Huntsman dr. If you click "View Tax Bill" next to any of the vehicles he owns, you'll see his address listed on each bill.
I wouldn't recommend contacting her, but if you do, do it anonymously.
If you know her name, chances are she owns some property that is in the publicly-accessible property tax databases for all of the counties around here. For example, search for William Bell in the Durham and you'll see that the mayor (William V "Bill" Bell) owns a house at 1003 Huntsman dr. If you click "View Tax Bill" next to any of the vehicles he owns, you'll see his address listed on each bill.
I agree. You can do the same search for Wake County tax records. What a mess. Sorry you're going through it. If you plan on divorce, I would definitely contact an attorney before you did anything.
Is it better for her to go on to marry him without knowing what
she is getting in to ? She will appreciate it at some point.
You are not creating the mess, they did.
I agree with you. This guy gets to go home every night and sleep in his bed while my world is crumbling. He deserves at least a sliver of the pain I'm going through.
And thank you to everyone regarding the tax bills, the little I do know is that he and his girlfriend are renters so that's a no-go.
And I agree anonymous would be helpful, that's why I was wondering if PI's provide this service or if someone else would.
I'm sorry. But even if this woman "deserves to know," I don't think it's your place to tell her. I understand you're angry and upset and hurt, but I really don't think this is the right thing to do. Leave it alone, and deal with your own situation, I'm sure this woman will find out eventually (cheating is a habitual sort of thing usually).
Since the OP has received answers to his question about who to contact and the other responses are focused more on the relationship, I'm moving this thread to that forum where it can be more appropriately addressed.
Sorry about your marriage. But, you best ya business, fella. Git on, before you get pee'd on. You found out what YOU needed to know. Now, you're out of bounds, by trying to chase down some fool who you don't even know. All you need to do is worry about yourself, and the *itch who got out on you. It ain't the end of the world. But it might be, if you go out there sticking your face in another mans busy-ness. The game is called "cop and blow", son... not cop, block, and lock. Sometimes you cop (pick 'em up), and sometimes you blow (loose 'em). One thing for sure, you can't make no female want you. You had your chance with her. Now, all you can do is make it worse. I mean, you're gonna tell this guys woman, you and him are gonna fight (because you know he's gonna retaliate), and after the two of you end up in jail, your wife is gonna still be out here,... WIT THE NEXT MAN! So, what are you gonna do then? You better get it together, and plan your exit. Be a man! Don't let no female take your freedom away from you. If you really want to get back at them, you have to rise above this, and be a better person than both of them. Success is the best revenge, right? Right now, you have all the options in the world. But, if you make the wrong mistake, your only option will be, Bubba the cell mate. And believe me, bro... if you can't deal with a little funky ass female, I know you can't handle lookin' at Bubba's stinkin' ass, all day.
As for why, well my reason is that here I am, my life may not be ruined but it is not changing for the better. He gets to go home every night like nothing ever happened. He knew she was married, so that's obviously a risk he was willing to take.
I know his girlfriend doesn't know. My wife specifically requested that I don't attempt to contact him because it would "ruin his life". So nice of her to care about ruining someone's life.
Your wife knew she was married too, obviously a risk she was willing to take. Don't shovel all the blame on the guy, if it wasn't him it would have been a different guy.
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