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Old 05-21-2012, 10:12 PM
 
4,574 posts, read 4,224,680 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JrzDefector View Post
But how do I interpret this? During our encounter (and in communications afterward) he paid me many compliments, which I took as sincere since he is not someone to say things he doesn’t mean. But he continually referred to my “beautiful face” while we were together. Not once or twice, but a lot.
I understand that looks can be very subjective, but objectively speaking my face is not beautiful. At all. I really like my face and I have a few very nice features, and my body type is highly appealing to some guys. But even my own father (Mr. Brutal Honesty) says I am simply “attractive,” but not pretty or beautiful. And that’s MY DAD. I’m not the type of woman that men hit on in a bar. Guys are attracted to my brain/attitude/body, and start thinking I’m beautiful a lot further down the road. NONE of them have ever been so fixated on my face.
Not sure about the guy situation, but...

Kudos on having some modesty and humility.

Just about every woman I have seen post online who is not overweight considers herself above average and at least a 7 out of 10.

... and EVERY woman gets hit on at bars. I know because I have been that drunk A-hole who hits on anything that moves. And I certainly don't start with the most beautiful girl in the bar. I'll tell you that much. You're not going to the right bars or not sticking around late enough.
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Old 05-21-2012, 10:17 PM
 
900 posts, read 882,762 times
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I think he sincerely finds you beautiful. The thing is , relationship doesn't seem to be high priority for either of you. You can call / text him. No need to wait for him. But either way , when you speak again , don't "have a talk with him" what do you want? Another date? Just be yourself and ask for it. I don't think any man needs "talking to" Good luck
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Old 05-21-2012, 10:35 PM
 
658 posts, read 660,876 times
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If all of his compliments are centered around your looks, that's what kind of relationship you have: a non-committal physical relationship.
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Old 05-21-2012, 10:44 PM
 
150 posts, read 123,595 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JrzDefector View Post
Meh. I just wanted some thoughts on what could be going on. I suspect he is simply "into" me when it's convenient for him, but his behavior is odd to say the least. Or maybe he's one of those guys who is enamored with whatever woman he may be with at the time. In any case, I've put the burden of contact on him. If he does get in touch, we're going to have a little chat, I think.
Here's a hint from a guys perspective: if a guy tells you you have a beautiful face (repeatedly) it means he has imagined waking up next to you everyday and with a smile on his face. It's almost instinctive/biological if you know what I mean.

My only other thought is that you guys have lost some of the chase energy since you've had sex so you may need to be a bit forward now. Something like "okay, lets cut to the chase, is there any serious dating potential between us or is just too inconvenient because of our work schedules?" That way he knows he has a choice.
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Old 05-21-2012, 10:52 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Sweetlilac View Post
If all of his compliments are centered around your looks, that's what kind of relationship you have: a non-committal physical relationship.
That's actually where it gets maybe a little interesting. The vast majority of comments about my attributes on our dates have been about my personality, humor and intelligence. Just when we were in the middle of the hot and heavy, he switched to his focus on my face. No need to start lavishing compliments at that point - I wasn't exactly going to push him off. Maybe it was just to have something to say - but what's wrong with "Oh baby"?

I dunno. I'm having fun at this point with my dating life in general, so I'm not going to get too hung up.

@maddog1, LOL, no worries, it won't be a "talking to" - more of an "any idea where we're going with this?"
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Old 05-21-2012, 11:02 PM
 
6,287 posts, read 3,706,450 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cjawalt View Post
Here's a hint from a guys perspective: if a guy tells you you have a beautiful face (repeatedly) it means he has imagined waking up next to you everyday and with a smile on his face. It's almost instinctive/biological if you know what I mean.

My only other thought is that you guys have lost some of the chase energy since you've had sex so you may need to be a bit forward now. Something like "okay, lets cut to the chase, is there any serious dating potential between us or is just too inconvenient because of our work schedules?" That way he knows he has a choice.
Hm. That's a lot more than I expected. Interesting.

Well, I have let him know that the choice is really his. I've kept it very nonconfrontational, but let my feelings on the situation be known (as in that I enjoy my time with him and would like to see him again).

We'll see Thanks for the insight!
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Old 05-21-2012, 11:31 PM
 
150 posts, read 123,595 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JrzDefector View Post
Hm. That's a lot more than I expected. Interesting.

Well, I have let him know that the choice is really his. I've kept it very nonconfrontational, but let my feelings on the situation be known (as in that I enjoy my time with him and would like to see him again).

We'll see Thanks for the insight!
Yeah, it's a wierd concept to digest at first but its true. Sometimes we act out of instinct when it comes to mating partners. I once had a friend tell me that when you catch a woman doing a quick glance at you it means you have triggered a biological profile she is attracted too. Kind of like a guy checking out a woman's body for fertlity purposes. I know I get this warm feeling when I look at a woman's face abd can see me waking up to her the rest of my life. And I generally dont complement a woman often to avoid being percieved as another nice guy.
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Old 05-21-2012, 11:37 PM
 
12,296 posts, read 7,408,536 times
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The words are great, but remember his actions matter most.
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