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So, I have a dilemma that needs to be solved. I am a male who has feelings for my roommate. The trust is mutual, her and I have known each other and have been friends for a while now (appox. 2 1/2 years). Though I now have found a strong attraction to her most recently. It hit me like a ton of bricks when I started having different thoughts of her than those I have had before.
Though on the other hand, I have also been single myself longer than my roommate and I have known each other. She recently ended a 5 year relationship, they were engaged. Given the circumstances, and the short period of time since they split. Which makes her still in the "rebound"; makes me question how long will it be before I decide to tell her how I really feel. Though I still question myself as to my intentions of furthering this friendship that we have. Questioning what I want; or what I need and as well as thinking about what her wants and needs might be. Should we seek a committed relationship or a FWB / no strings attached friendship?
Give the time since she split from her fiance, she may not want to jump into another committed relationship. Though being in a "no strings attached" relationship has it's ups and downs, it would solve both of our problems (sex, and sex without numerous hook ups via one night stands). It could create more problems; like jealousy if she or I had met someone else.
I've done research; I've read up on what can happen between friends if both of the opposite sexes are living together. I've found either way could have its ups and downs. There are no real questions for me to ask you (the one reading this) though maybe your insight maybe useful for me to think over.
Oh so everyone remembers that thread where the chick with a boyfriend wanted to have a male roommate and most of you said Oh go ahead honey it will be fine? Well here you go.
Honestly dude 2 points here: #1 IF she was interested she probably wouldn't be rooming with you and #2 She is just getting out of a serious relationship. 5 years and they were engaged? That's not going to heal over night.
Honestly dude 2 points here: #1 IF she was interested she probably wouldn't be rooming with you.
Who said she wasn't interested. There is more too it that I decided to leave out; that I already know. It's not a question as too "If" but more so: "When".
Who said she wasn't interested. There is more too it that I decided to leave out; that I already know. It's not a question as too "If" but more so: "When".
If she's giving you signals after just getting out of a 5 year long engagement ... then you are almost guaranteed to be in a rebound situation. And that's dirty pool on her part going for the roommate imo!
it only seems impossible because you are spending so much time thinking about it instead of doing anything about it.
stop "researching" and start living and learning.
It hit me like a ton of bricks when I started having different thoughts of her than those I have had before.
Let me guess: you don't meet many girls, do you?
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Originally Posted by QuestioningJester
tell her how I really feel.
It's always better to just make a move.
Quote:
Originally Posted by QuestioningJester
I've done research; I've read up on what can happen between friends if both of the opposite sexes are living together. I've found either way could have its ups and downs. There are no real questions for me to ask you (the one reading this) though maybe your insight maybe useful for me to think over.
Huh?
Quote:
Originally Posted by QuestioningJester
Who said she wasn't interested. There is more too it that I decided to leave out; that I already know. It's not a question as too "If" but more so: "When".
This would have been good to know originally. However, since you had to "do research," I'm doubting your ability to judge whether or not a girl is actually interested in you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by QuestioningJester
CaptainJack- Maybe I have too.
First of all, it's "to." Second, why are you asking us if you already know what you're going to do?
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