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Sounds to me like he has a circle of friends which includes girls and is laying it out there from the start. Doesn't sound like a big deal at all to me. If you're uncomfortable with a guy having friends who are girls you should let this guy go, and then re-evaulate yourself and realize that guys are going to have friends that are girls.
It's very odd. Why would he not just tell you he has female friends? If you are not OK with that that would then be mentioned. it's just basic communication. If he does have them that he see's regularly and does not introduce you once a relationship develops, His definition of 'friends" differs from mine IMHO.
Ask him to clarify. And no you shouldn't question him if he's talking to other women, if they are his friends, but he should introduce you to them if he's going to be your SO.
I met a guy who seems to be interested in a relationship. During our conversation, he started laying down some groundrules and one of them was that if I see him out with other women I can't get "angry" or question him about it. I asked if he is proposing an open relationship & he said no. He explained that he has lady friends and he doesn't want to be with a girl who is the jealous type. Is this a red flag? Do you think this guy may be a potential cheater or jerk? I really like him and I finally found someone who wants to be in a committed relationship with me and I don't want to mess up
Perhaps a dumb question, however are you sure that you are not the jealous type...? I have a feeling...
I will say, from a guys POV, that many guys want to have sex with their female 'friends' and often are just waiting for the right opportunity... Ladies, say/believe what you want, but guys talk to each other...
Call me old fashioned or perhaps merely experienced, but people in a committed relationship really shouldn't offer themselves the temptations of putting themselves in suspicious situations, IF they care about the person that they are with...
Casual relationships, such as a 'group' of friends, male & female, are one thing, going out one on one is another... There are exceptions, however exceptions are not the rule...
Rose, you seem like a decent person that most often gives guys the benefit of the doubt, and that seems to leave you with regret.
Personally, I believe that you are going after the wrong type of guys. Those that don't learn from the past are condemned to repeat it...
I met a guy who seems to be interested in a relationship. During our conversation, he started laying down some groundrules and one of them was that if I see him out with other women I can't get "angry" or question him about it. I asked if he is proposing an open relationship & he said no. He explained that he has lady friends and he doesn't want to be with a girl who is the jealous type. Is this a red flag? Do you think this guy may be a potential cheater or jerk? I really like him and I finally found someone who wants to be in a committed relationship with me and I don't want to mess up
First thing to NOTE here is that this guy is being HONEST with you, which is a GOOD sign.
Would you like to have relationship with a HONEST person or not?
The guy informed you that he has female friends and he cautioned you beforehand because he may not like to be mistreated in-front of his female friends. Now that you know this, you can convey your CONCERNS to him, if you have any. Communication is very important for a relationship. Remember this.
If you want to take more time before you decide to commit, then take more time. But do inform this guy about your likings and dislikings. If things work out well, consider having relationship. If not, then leave.
Good luck.
Last edited by LeGenDary_Man; 11-18-2012 at 09:06 AM..
Yes, it is odd that he'd bring it up like that. Tell him you hope he won't go ballistic if he sees you hanging out with your guy friends. The groundrules are that he can't even question you about it. Let us know what he says.
yeah OP I would suggest you tell him that and if he cries foul if i were u, i will laugh while walking away ... far far away from the douchebag.
I met a guy who seems to be interested in a relationship. During our conversation, he started laying down some groundrules and one of them was that if I see him out with other women I can't get "angry" or question him about it. I asked if he is proposing an open relationship & he said no. He explained that he has lady friends and he doesn't want to be with a girl who is the jealous type. Is this a red flag? Do you think this guy may be a potential cheater or jerk? I really like him and I finally found someone who wants to be in a committed relationship with me and I don't want to mess up
Yes, it's a red flag. It's a voluntary relationship, not an employment contract. Leave him and let him replace employee 1A-2C-546 with employee 1A-2C-547.
Having female friends and not wanting jealousy over it is not a red flag to me, the "rule" where you're not allowed to question him is. What does he mean by that? If you are out and see him with someone you can't walk up to them and say hi? Or you can't ask him who it was later? If these women are really just friends then none of that should be a problem. But if he wants you to never speak about it or ask him a single question then he has a screw loose. Or he thinks you do. LMAO.
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