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I don't know about him, but even if my ex-wife said a bunch of negative crap about me, it wouldn't keep me from seeing my children, they're my kids and I would make for damn sure I'd see them every week.
Yeah, I agree. I want to ask him so bad about it. Why he told me he was hurting he lost his son. It can easily be remedied by having another child. But well we supposed to be non contact for a week. I actually thought he also swore off marriage. Like George Clooney. LOL. So was surprised he is offering marriage to me. Just no kids.
Yeah, I agree. I want to ask him so bad about it. Why he told me he was hurting he lost his son. It can easily be remedied by having another child. But well we supposed to be non contact for a week. I actually thought he also swore off marriage. Like George Clooney. LOL. So was surprised he is offering marriage to me. Just no kids.
Sounds kind of like he has no backbone.
my ex-wife talks crap about me so I can't see my kids.
I refuse to marry, but OK I'll marry you, but no kids!
next thing will be OK we can have no kids but you're raising them!
He'll cave on on that too.
I could understand if he was willing to compromise, but it just seems like he just gives into things without trying to stick to his guns.
my ex-wife talks crap about me so I can't see my kids.
I refuse to marry, but OK I'll marry you, but no kids!
next thing will be OK we can have no kids but you're raising them!
He'll cave on on that too.
I could understand if he was willing to compromise, but it just seems like he just gives into things without trying to stick to his guns.
He did not say he does not want to marry ever. I just thought, he has no plans anymore. Seeing as he is still hurting 16 years after the divorce. He actually said he should have not contacted me since it says in my profile I want kids and in his it says he does not want kids. I honestly don't remember that.
Not having kids I honestly am 50/50 on that. I just am baffled at his RIGID stance. Would love to know from him myself. But in the meantime, I'll take other's POV.
According to him, he can't. He said his wife is vindictive. He said having relationship with his son now will make it worse than good because his ex will just belittle him in front of his son. Which prompts me to ask why would she do that when he has been a nice guy, so far as I know. I told him I don't get it. He said it's just how his ex wife is, so is her mom, maybe it runs in the family. He has been divorced for 16 years. He said marriage is forever and when he lost his 1st marriage it almost destroyed him and took him a LONG time to heal. His wife left him for someone who makes more money. He said he does not want to, but if 1 wants out of relationship, nothing the other can do.
Yeah? My soon to be ex would say the exact same thing over the loss of contact he's had with our child.
The truth? My soon to be ex is avoiding visiting his son because it means 1) he has to travel (600 miles), 2) his new gf can't partake in the visitation (court order), and 3) he actually has to spend time away from his gf in order to have a relationship with his son. So, our 9.5 month old has only seen his father for a grand total of 6 hours in the past 3.5 months.
You're only getting his half of the story, and his half is based on what he wants to say. Just sayin.
Yeah, I agree. I want to ask him so bad about it. Why he told me he was hurting he lost his son. It can easily be remedied by having another child. But well we supposed to be non contact for a week. I actually thought he also swore off marriage. Like George Clooney. LOL. So was surprised he is offering marriage to me. Just no kids.
I'm not commenting on the rest of the thread but this, "Why he told me he was hurting he lost his son. It can easily be remedied by having another child" is crap.
Having another child does NOT replace the feeling of loss.
Honestly I was taken aback by this revelation on the email he sent me. The reason why I decided to back up from the relationship is coz I thought he has no plans to marry anymore. That he is just content on having LTR with me or anyone for that matter but living separately. He lives in his place, I live in my place. Now I don't get that set up.
Committed relationship for me is we either live together or we get married. Last time we talk prior to the email he sent me. I thought he want neither.
Then the email he sent me said he is willing to marry me tomorrow just I have to be certain that I won't be angry with him because he does not want to have kids no way, not at his age, his words.
I do love him though, I'm glad he is willing to marry me, the no kids stance just bothered me.
I'm not commenting on the rest of the thread but this, "Why he told me he was hurting he lost his son. It can easily be remedied by having another child" is crap.
Having another child does NOT replace the feeling of loss.
I agree. I realized that after I post it. I guess what I just have to do is ask him why he was hurting he lost his son and maybe the root why he does not want kids anymore?
Actually I have a hunch that part of why they divorced is coz he was not happy his wife get pregnant. I plan to ask him that. Otherwise I really don't see why her ex can be vindictive to him? He is such a gentle, nice guy. Makes no sense why his ex can be vindictive when she was the one who wronged him - she left him for another guy who makes more money. If there's someone who will hold a grudge, it's him not her.
He also has specific instruction. He will not accept/expect an answer from me for at least a week. That if I decide to be with him then in Jan. 24 I have to text him if I don't then he understands that I did not agree with him not wanting kids.
He won't even let me talk to him?? About him not wanting kids?
Honestly I was taken aback by this revelation on the email he sent me. The reason why I decided to back up from the relationship is coz I thought he has no plans to marry anymore. That he is just content on having LTR with me or anyone for that matter but living separately. He lives in his place, I live in my place. Now I don't get that set up.
Committed relationship for me is we either live together or we get married. Last time we talk prior to the email he sent me. I thought he want neither.
Then the email he sent me said he is willing to marry me tomorrow just I have to be certain that I won't be angry with him because he does not want to have kids no way, not at his age, his words.
I do love him though, I'm glad he is willing to marry me, the no kids stance just bothered me.
I might have you mixed up with someone else. Did you recently break up with this guy?
Okay I found your other thread. it is a bit confusing, but it sounds like you did break up and you were an official couple for 11 days?
You are thinking about marrying this same guy?
I'm quite confused.
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I actually thought he also swore off marriage. Like George Clooney. LOL. So was surprised he is offering marriage to me. Just no kids.
