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It's been a year since I posted here but I think I've pretty much thrown in the towel. The relationship I posted about fizzled out--turns out he was never into me. Just liked the sex.
Anyway, I figure life is to short to be all wrapped up in this romantic love nonsense. The amount of time and money I've spent sorting through online dating, going to speed dating events, and wasted dating men who were either jerk, nuts, or just not really into me... meh.
I've never had good luck with men--I mean, they find me attractive at first, but I usually end up being "one of the guys" in the end. It's annoying as hell to be told, "I wish my wife/girlfriend/SO was more like you... you're cool" or "I wish I could find a girl like you." All I can think of is, "no you don't... deep down, you don't." But it is cool to have so many male friends... they are fun to be around as we tend to share the same interests.
But I am not going to change who I am for anyone--been there, done that, and was miserable. I have plenty of non-romantic love in my life with family, friends, and even my dog loves me. I've been kind of thinking what it is I want to do now. Looking for love did take up a lot of time. I am considering travel for more life experiences. It would be nice to have a travel buddy--maybe I can join a travel club of some sort.
I think I am just tired of all the effort without results... besides, the summer is coming and I have tons of free time coming up for a change. I want to "do" something (other than look for love). I just need a change in my life.
I think I am just tired of all the effort without results... besides, the summer is coming and I have tons of free time coming up for a change. I want to "do" something (other than look for love). I just need a change in my life.
We all do. It'll happen when you least expect it. At least that's what my mom used to tell me,lol.
I've given up too. Looking anyway. I removed all on-line profiles. If I meet someone out of the blue someday, that would be great, and I hope I do, but I am no longer looking.
I've been divorced for 12 years now, and am really independent. It would be hard to start again, but for the right man, I would gladly do it.
I've given up too. Looking anyway. I removed all on-line profiles. If I meet someone out of the blue someday, that would be great, and I hope I do, but I am no longer looking.
I've been divorced for 12 years now, and am really independent. It would be hard to start again, but for the right man, I would gladly do it.
...turns out he was never into me. Just liked the sex.
Did you get a sense of that beforehand? If so, you gotta put a clamp on it.
If premarital sex is involved with or without a firm commitment that has been demonstrated and verbally expressed from a man less than a 6 months to a year time, the notion has to be entertained that it's just sex... unfortunately.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jillabean
I have plenty of non-romantic love in my life with family, friends, and even my dog loves me.
It's refreshing that you are able to recognize that and express it!
If premarital sex is involved with or without a firm commitment that has been demonstrated and verbally expressed from a man less than a 6 months to a year time, the notion has to be entertained that it's just sex... unfortunately.
*scratches head*
Eh....wazzat?
Clarify, please.
If I'm reading your post right, I disagree in the strongest possible way. I probably WOULD be willing to have a gf again, depending, but there's no way in all of creation that I'd get married again. Want to spend many years together, hang out, travel, camp, whatever, in addition to normal relationship stuff (sex)? Great. Marriage? Out of the question, get out of my car and get out of my life.
I ever have another relationship, first time she brings up marriage, she gets a warning. Second time, she's shown the door.
I had a similar experience to what you describe. At my old job, I met a woman and we became friends. We hung out a lot; and of course I started to like her. I never told her though. When I left the job, she said we could still hang out; but that was before I sent her "love letter" of sorts over facebook. Never heard back from her after that. She never outright said I was needy or clingy or anything. But I suspect that may have been in her thought process. I considered that situation a lesson learned.
I have a question. Neither one of us told the respective women that we liked them. What was your reason for not telling her?
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You are really sweet. 
