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Women I know who pursued divorced did so because of spousal/child abuse, emotional neglect, alcoholism/drug abuse, financial irresponsibility or infidelity (usually repeated)
Certainly there was nothing "boring" about these marriages. Too much instability, rather.
I suggest to anyone who believes that women divorce out of boredom (or greed) to read some of the divorce forums. What people endure (men and women) before taking the step to divorce is typically excruciating.
This.
I left my ex because he did not care about maintaining any significant bond with me. I hung around 10 years waiting for him to put his family before himself or his friends. Eventually I found happiness in other relationships by cheating. He would say this caused the marriage to end but in reality it ended long before we walked down the aisle.
I have been in a happy relationship for years now and cheating has never crossed my mind, because my bf takes the time to be interested in me, not just himself.
Personally,my first divorce I filed. Reasons, irresponsible and excessive consumption of alcohol and the inherit problems associated with it, one being physical and emotional abuse. A reason many have never heard of abuse as a reason for divorce is because it is definitely not something your proud of and eager to tell everyone about. It is actually embarrassing and has associated stigma.There was also the financial irresponsibility that goes along with alcoholism,the emotional distancing, apathy and neglect of family not to mention fighting. And this was after years of one sided trying to make things work.
Second divorce, he filed. I can only give my side. Alcohol, again. IMO he developed NPD or similar disorder. Not sure if it was in part due to the drinking or the drinking was due to the NPD. Not sure if it was there all along and I just didnt recognize it or it is something that develops later in life. At any rate he went from dr. jekyll to mr. hyde. Also extreme laziness and inability to hold a job.
Of other divorces, infidelity, addiction and abuse. I know of one marriage that is teetering due to the frustration of being taken for granted.
I left my ex because he did not care about maintaining any significant bond with me. I hung around 10 years waiting for him to put his family before himself or his friends. Eventually I found happiness in other relationships by cheating. He would say this caused the marriage to end but in reality it ended long before we walked down the aisle.
I have been in a happy relationship for years now and cheating has never crossed my mind, because my bf takes the time to be interested in me, not just himself.
Why cheat? Why not just leave and then pursue a relationship?
I don't know that many people who have divorced, either, but in the majority of the cases, the antecedent leading to the divorce has been infidelity on the part of the husband.
The factors contributing to the infidelity are likely many and varied, and I suppose we could all play the blame game about that till we're blue in the face, but it would really just be conjecture.
I didn't pick someone who was as concerned about my well-being as I was about hers. I didn't pick someone who was as committed to our life together as I was.
This is what happened in my previous long-term relationship, as well, which was thankfully not a marriage and so, thankfully, did not involve a divorce.
For a (short) time, I beat myself up about this, that I was stupid, chose poorly, made a mistake, was an enormously sh*tty judge of character, a fool, an idiot, etc. But the truth is, he did, for all but about the last six months or so of our five-year long relationship, give every appearance of being every bit as committed as I was. Was it a charade? Was it lies? Was it self-delusion on his part? I'll never know. And that never knowing, I realize, the more time goes by, isn't really that big a deal.
In the majority of divorces that I know of, it was the woman's fault, as in she cheated on the man, or she left him because he didn't make enough money.
But I don't know the whole story for most of those, I just knew the guy who was on the receiving end of the divorce.
In the majority of divorces that I know of, it was the woman's fault, as in she cheated on the man, or she left him because he didn't make enough money.
But I don't know the whole story for most of those, I just knew the guy who was on the receiving end of the divorce.
Sometimes I wonder if women hear more "true confessions" and admission of wrong-doing or mistakes from male friends who are divorced than men do.
Sometimes I wonder if women hear more "true confessions" and admission of wrong-doing or mistakes from male friends who are divorced than men do.
I don't know the other side of the stories, but I DO know that there are some absolutely crazy women out there, with the story of why my best friend lost his fiance.
I don't think anyone should cheat for any reason, but I guess if the "perfect storm" of circumstances happen, someone could not act in the right mindset and make bad choices. Or, of course, she could just be like "I just need some vitamin D today, and my husband is away..."
I don't know the other side of the stories, but I DO know that there are some absolutely crazy women out there, with the story of why my best friend lost his fiance.
I don't think anyone should cheat for any reason, but I guess if the "perfect storm" of circumstances happen, someone could not act in the right mindset and make bad choices. Or, of course, she could just be like "I just need some vitamin D today, and my husband is away..."
Yeah, everyone is the hero in his own story, but a marriage usually never ends because one person is entirely at fault. It could very well be that a woman cheats, but she might have felt neglected by her husband who spent all of his free time playing video games. Takes two to tango and all.
You were responding to a post that people other than the married couple should have say over when marriage ends.
No, no, no...no one has a SAY but the married couple.
But it is wrong to say they are the only people who are affected.
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