Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
The thing that has worked the best for me is to use genuine loving and affectionate words, with her Truly-meant, heartfelt loving words can often be underestimated and underrated by some, IMO. I have always been a little baffled tbh, about why there is so much of an overemphasis on romantic non-verbal communication and body language, when a person could just as easily speak (or write) about their strong caring romantic feelings for someone who is very special to them.
In any event, using (always meant sincerely and honestly obviously, of course) verbal and written expressions of tender love and affection was a definite winner for me Everything from cute, light-hearted verbal playfulness to terms and expressions of endearment, to lots of "ILY's", and even some romantic poetry and prose, that I had written for her...
On cold winter mornings, I'll throw her coat into the dryer for a few minutes so it's toasty warm. I'll also warm her car up for her (heater and seat heater).
A surprise weekend trip to Vegas, "just because".
Flowers, of course.
Random text messages during the work day.
Etc. etc.
I'm a romantic at heart and have found that it's important to never let that part of me go.
--Dim
Dim,
The coat gesture is so great! Big props to you.....
I like the small romantic things best, nothing over the top. A card, a note, a sexy text, a massage, doing something for me that I normally find tedious, a long car ride at night, a surprise "make out" session, etc.
Looking back on my days when I had occasion to be in romantic settings with my S.O. I would say these are the things he did that I liked best.
#1 with a bullet: Neck nuzzles when I'm cooking or doing laundry. It was a kind of sly, shy way to communicate desire, but at the same time it says" "I'll be patient and wait till you're done with your project"
2. Cuddling while we watch TV or a movie.
3. A playful swat on the backside.
4. Lighting a scented candle (sandalwood) in the living room and giving me a foot massage.
We do as we are taught by YOU. If chivalry still paid off, more guys would be chivalrous. If women decided to only have sex with men who walk on their hands, within a year almost all men would walk on their hands. Its all up to you.
How about this one ladies? My old girlfriend(now ex) was asleep so i tip toed out to the corner store, bought a box of good an plenty candy, tiptoed back in and wrote a note saying "thanks for the good an plenty love" then i left it on my pillow next to her and went to work.
On cold winter mornings, I'll throw her coat into the dryer for a few minutes so it's toasty warm. I'll also warm her car up for her (heater and seat heater).
A surprise weekend trip to Vegas, "just because".
Flowers, of course.
Random text messages during the work day.
Etc. etc.
I'm a romantic at heart and have found that it's important to never let that part of me go.
Being romantic, or even more simply, 'nice to someone' only gets someone taken advantage of anymore.
Especially with online dating. With an endless supply of people that have otherwise no connections, people can burn bridge after bridge and their family and friends never know what happened.
"I thought you and so-and-so were doing well?" says family or friend.
"Oh (he/she) turned out to be crazy." says online dater or however they meet the 'random'.
In the meantime the person in the story is not taking dating seriously.
And why should they? With all the options and fun out there, who wants the fun to end?
People claim to want relationships, but I think most people want that fire in the bottle that occurs when you connect with someone early on. Problem is, that fire usually dulls somewhat, and people get bored and seek that new flame again.
Real relationships don't usually contain a never ending flame. Usually, in the beginning it is at it's hottest, and the lucky ones find someone that is compatitble enough to maintain that flame at a high level.
Me and some of my friends used to do the chivelrous routine. About 15 years ago, dinner was almost a mandatory first date option. You did dinner, then something afterwards. If things go well, at some point (date x), some level of physical activity occured and a relationship insued. This was about 5-7 years before online dating starting really picking up steam. If you dated someone, it was through networking, or a job. Therefore, you had to be somewhat PC, and play nice.
There was always the occasional random at the bar/mall/event, but those weren't as frequent.
But people didn't 'date' if they weren't initially interested in the person.
It wasn't this, "well, I'll give so and so a chance. I can get a free meal out of it"
It was, "oh my, so and so asked me out! "
And from what I have heard, there are a lot of people that joke to their friends, "person X is too sweet/nice".
And they enjoy being spoiled until they get bored and then move along. Suckers!
And since I am a guy and speak mainly with guys about dating, I hear the guys side of the story.
But from the guys side, it IS rough out there.
I choose to no longer be chivalrous. The past 5 years, being chivalrous has absolutely NOT helped me in dating. In fact, it has costed me more money, and it allowed myself to be taken advantage of. I no longer choose to be taken advantage of. And my personal experience dating women has led me to this path.
So this is what's wrong with dating! Since I don't want to be stuck with someone I don't really know for a whole dinner, I usually opt for coffee/tea/snack with someone from online dating (which I don't do anymore) and save the dinner for guys I've actually had interaction with (like from work, etc.).
I LOVE when I get excited about a guy I like finally asking me out. Maybe that's why I dislike online dating so much - I just miss the initial excitement of running into someone I like at work or school or the gym and flirting, then anxiously awaiting the point where we decide we're going to go on a date. I'm at that point right now and can't wait for the guy I like to ask me out. I'll be ecstatic when he finally does!
I wouldn't say that chivalry has no place, but I'd save the nice dinners for girls you know are actually excited to go on a date with you and save the coffee/tea for those who "just want a free meal," so the ones who really want to go on a date with you can show you how much they appreciate the dinner with you - to them it's more than just a free meal. I can promise you that!
Ok lets turn it up a notch shall we? Ladies is it romantic to have breakfast made for you in bed? With kona coffee, and fresh org juice and fresh flowers?
Ok lets turn it up a notch shall we? Ladies is it romantic to have breakfast made for you in bed? With kona coffee, and fresh org juice and fresh flowers?
Yes.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Truly-meant, heartfelt loving words can often be underestimated and underrated by some, IMO. I have always been a little baffled tbh, about why there is so much of an overemphasis on romantic non-verbal communication and body language, when a person could just as easily speak (or write) about their strong caring romantic feelings for someone who is very special to them. 
